The strangest world
by Brienna25
Summary: Wanda and Ian's life after the book: "The Host". Wanda's POV. What happens with Kyle & Sunny? What are Mel & Jared up to? After a rough time in the caves, they go out to build a new world.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 1**

I'm bathing when I suddenly realize it. It's been two months. I need to talk to Melanie. I know this hasn't happened to anyone for the last few years. She will know what to do.  
I dry myself of and I leave for the great hall. It's most likely that she'll be there. Last time I saw her she and Jared were sitting in a corner, laughing about something. I didn't want to go sit with them, even though when Melanie saw me she waved. It seemed too intimate. But then again, it always feels intimate when you're around them, everybody agrees on that. They are so close.

Melanie is not in the great hall though. I try to remember what her task is for today. I'll have to go check the schedule in the kitchen. Jamie's on the other end of the great hall though, I really hope he doesn't see me, I really need to talk to Mel now.

"Hey, Wanda, wait up!"  
Of course, he saw me, that boy can really be too observant.  
"Hey Jamie, how are you?"  
"I'm great! Where are you going? It looks like your looking for someone."  
"I am, I'm looking for Melanie, do you know where she is?"  
"Of course I do! She went out with Jared this morning. What do you need her for?"  
She's not here. If I know Melanie – and I do – she'll be out for the rest of the day. I really wanted to talk to her now.  
"Uhm.. It's nothing Jamie, I'll just wait until she gets back."  
"You could come with us, we're going to the game room. Sunny wanted to see Kyle play."  
"No, Jamie, thank you, I'll go to the kitchen then."  
"Are you okay Wanda? You seem a bit distracted."  
"I'm fine, Jamie, don't you worry about me. Go play, tell Ian to win for me."

I feel hands on my shoulder and I tense a bit. This body still doesn't know those hands yet, even though _I_ do. I know it is Ian. And right after that little tensing of my shoulders I relax and lean into him. It's amazing what love can do. I feel so natural with him. It's just this body that is still not adjusted. It's been six months since the night Jamie brought us back together. But even those six months have not made my new body accustomed to Ian. We've cuddled, we're holding hands all the time and we share a bed. I know every inch of him and he knows everything about mine. But still this body – my body – seems unwilling to accept his touch. Since I am not, it's no problem. But I wish my body would stop fidgeting sometimes.

"You're going to let Jamie wish me luck? Just come watch yourself." Ian says.  
"I was going to bake some more bread. Maybe see if I can help out with dinner."  
Ian sighs. "Really Wanda, we all get days off, you know that. Take a day off too."  
"I really don't mind. I like to keep busy. Besides, today is not my scheduled day off. And I wouldn't know what to do with my time if I didn't help out."  
"Who cares? We all take an extra day now and then. Melanie and Jared took one today. You're just as entitled to it. Come watch me, talk to Sunny and laugh at us. I want to see you have fun."  
"Melanie and Jared being out is all the more reason for me not to skip today. There are already two persons missing. What if everyone decides to take an extra day of at the same day?"  
Jamie interrupts me: "We do, on the days that Jeb makes us all play!"  
"I know, but this isn't one of those days. Really, I enjoy cooking. I'm fine in the kitchen, you boys go."  
Ian kisses me on the forehead "Alright, I'll see you at dinner."

He doesn't press me. He never would. He knows I'd say yes for him and he doesn't want that. He wants me to make choices because I want to make them, not because I'm trying to make other people happy. Immediately I want to change my mind because coming with them would make him happy. If I can make him happy, I want to do that. But then I see doc on the other end of the room. And he's heading to the kitchen. I didn't think of him yet, but of course, he can help me out as well. It might even be a better option than talking to Melanie.  
I balance up on my toes, Ian leans in and I kiss him and wish him luck. I wave Jamie off and head to the kitchen.

_Authors note:_

_This is my first time writing; ever. Reviews are very much appreciated :-)_


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 2**

I walk into the kitchen, looking for Doc. He's sitting at a table with Sharon. I think walking up to him to talk right now isn't a good idea, with Sharon there. She still doesn't like me. Loosened up? Yes. Liking me? Really not.  
So I turn around and walk to the stoves. I look in the cabinets for the food schedule. I want to know what's for dinner, so I can get an early start. If I prepare everything right now it won't take that much time tonight. And really, I haven't got anything better to do right now. Potatoes and carrots. Good, I can peel the potatoes and clean the carrots, then it only needs to be cooked tonight. It's almost a mindless job. While my hands are busy, I can just think about other things…

_"Jared is my past, another life, you're my present."  
"And your future, if you want me to." The way Ian kisses me. He makes me blush. This body blushes. I can't get used to that. I'm used to a body that can lie. Where my cheeks don't reveal the way I feel. My poker face is gone. _

_Living with him in the same room. It's so intimate. I feel married to him. When I came to this world, I knew beforehand what their customs were. How the partnering and mating goes. I had considered as a Soul to become a mother. But I didn't feel ready for it yet. I didn't want to leave the universe myself. So when I came to know of this world I was fascinated with their way of reproducing. Instead of becoming a Soul-mother, I decided I would become a human mother. Productive in more than one way. It would give new Souls new bodies. And keep the human population at a good level. We needed human babies. Being able to birth a baby and not be gone myself, the idea was very appealing. But, off course, Melanie was in the body with me. And I came to the cave.  
Could it be happening to me right now? I haven't bled for two full months. I'm supposed to have had my period by now. I know all about the physical part of it, but only in theory. I might be wrong. And I don't know how Ian will react. He's always so careful. That one conversation we had about it made it very clear how he thought about children:_

_"We can't have children, Wanda, I won't bring them into this world. It's bad enough that we have to deal with the possibility of getting taken ourselves. What if our child would be captured? At a young age? And a Soul went in and after years we could get it out and our child would be gone? The younger a human is, the more likely it is they will fade away when a Soul goes in. I couldn't live with myself. No, we can't have children in this world."_

_Talking to Doc or Melanie first seems like a wise decision. I have no idea how Ian would react, how mad he will be at me._

"Wanda!"  
"What? Oh, sorry, Doc, what is it?"  
"You seemed far away there, is everything all right?"  
"Yes, thank you, I'm fine. I did want to talk to you though, but it's kind off busy in here", I say, while looking around the suddenly loud room. The kitchen is filling up. People are making sandwiches and taking fruit. Sharon started handing out milk. Talking right now is not going to work. Doc looks at me. "Have lunch first, I'll be in the hospital the entire afternoon."

I see Ian walk in with Jamie and Kyle. Sunny and Candy are right behind them, laughing about something. I think about joining them but realize that I have been thinking too much while I was peeling the potatoes. I'm not even half way through. But I have done this so many times that I don't even need my eyes for this task anymore. So I keep looking at the boys. It's nice to see Ian smile. His smile always makes me smile. I'm too far off to hear what they are talking about, but I'm not curious at all. If it's important Ian will tell me tonight. And then Ian sees me. I blush. This body blushes, I don't blush. Why can't I get the automatic reflexes of this body to stop? After all the time I spent in Melanie's body, I was accustomed to being strong, fast, not too tough, but also not girly. This body makes me feel weak at times. At first because I really am weak and no-one will let me do something about it, as soon as I try to lift something someone runs to my aid. But secondly because it is so girly. It keeps giving me away, every time. I can't seem to get it under control.

"Hey, come sit with us, I already grabbed you some sandwiches." Ian takes the knife out of my hand and holds my hand tight. I know he will let me go if I want him to, but it feels good. It's where my hand belongs.  
"How did the match go? Did you win?"  
"Of course we won, Kyle and I are unbeatable."  
I smile to myself. Kyle and Ian really are unbeatable. I haven't seen anyone win against the two of them. We walk up to the table and I sit down next to Sunny. She's holding hands with Kyle. It's like those two are glued together. You rarely see one of them alone. Sunny says that she has tried and tried to find Jodi, but Jodi just isn't there anymore. Kyle is still upset about it, Jodi was the love of his life. Ian is still upset as well, Jodi felt like a sister to him. But Kyle has grown fond off Sunny, so with Jodie gone this is the best possible outcome.

As always, Jamie is the one talking the most. I take the plate Ian hands me and just listen to Jamie talk.  
"I wonder when Jared and Mel will be back, they didn't tell anyone what they were going out for. What do you think they're doing out there, Wanda?"  
Ian whispers to me: "It's all Jamie can talk about, we wanted to drop the subject, but he kept going on. He asked all of us what we thought, but of course, we don't have the faintest clue."  
I answer Jamie:"I don't know what they are out there doing. I just think they wanted some time for themselves."

"Yeah Wanda, that's what everybody else said. But if they just wanted time for themselves, they could have gone to one of the remote caves. I think they're up to something."  
"I wouldn't know. And if they didn't tell, they must not want anyone to know either. Let them have that Jamie, don't smother them when they come back."  
"Aren't you in the least curious?"  
Was I? No, not really. I mean, I wouldn't mind knowing. But I didn't mind not knowing either. My guess was that they just wanted to feel free out there, together.  
Jeb comes walking in, looking for someone. Jamie cringes a bit and then Jeb sees him. He stalks toward us, straight for Jamie and he looks mad. I can't help it. It's instinct. I inherited it from the time I was in Melanie's body. I jump up and stand before Jamie. By the time Ian realizes what I'm doing, Jeb's standing there, looking confused at me.  
"Wanda, what are you doing?"  
"You seem mad, Jeb, are you mad?"  
"Well, yes, I need to talk to Jamie."  
"He's sitting right here, you can talk." Oh, I hate when my instincts take over like this. I didn't mean to be rude to Jeb. And after all the time I spent here I know Jeb wouldn't hurt Jamie. Of course he wouldn't, he loves the boy too much. But still, I couldn't help but react this way. Ian pulls my hand softly.

"Wanda, it's okay, Jeb just wants to talk to him, let's go and give them some time to talk." Kyle agreed: "Yes, let's let them talk, come on Sunny."  
"You boys can forget about that, you're not going anywhere, I need to talk to all three of you. But Wanda, please do take Sunny with you." Ian and Kyle sigh and slouch back down in their chairs.  
"Okay Jeb, thank you for the sandwiches Ian, come on Sunny." I kiss Ian, take Sunny by the hand and walk to the counter. I hand Sunny some carrots and go back to peeling potatoes myself. We are on the other side of the room, but since Jeb is yelling, we can hear every word.  
"Why did you think it was okay to go and play? There is work to be done! You irresponsible people! Jared and Mel took off and with the three of you not working either, the field is never going to get ready today! We need food, people! Get your buts off those chairs and get to work!"  
Sunny is trembling beside me. I can empathize with her. Whilst all I feel right now is amusement, I know that she must be feeling differently. She's still scared of the humans, with their unpredictable character. I'm not scared anymore. My body is sometimes, but I'm not. I know they won't hurt me.  
The boys get up and wave at us. It's going to be a late night for them, I guess. After missing all that time for work this morning they will have to catch up on it. I'll just finish up dinner preparations and then see if I can find Doc.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 3.**

After Sunny and I finish up on dinner preparations I tell her I want to go to my room. She asks if she can come along. I wasn't going to go to my room, but to Doc. And I really wanted some time alone, but Sunny looks sad, so I say yes. When we get to my room I look more closely at her.  
"Sunny, are you okay?"  
"No, I don't think I feel so well."  
"What's wrong then?"  
"I don't really know. I just feel sick. I keep throwing up about 30 min. after every meal."  
I begin to get an idea about what might be going on with her. And I start to blush. Of course, Sunny notices.  
"What are you blushing about, Wanda?"  
I hadn't realized that her relationship with Kyle was going that direction. It should have been obvious though. They are always together, they share a room, it's just like me and Ian in a way.  
"Sunny, before you came you read the info about earth didn't you? And when you got Jodie's body, you got all her memories with it right? And after that, I think you have followed classes, just like we all do when we first come here. You must realize what's going on, why you're feeling sick."  
"Well, I'm sorry, Wanda, but I really don't get it."  
"Have you bled recently? When was the last time?"  
"It must be… around three months ago…"  
Sunny turns white. "You think I'm pregnant!?"  
I don't get the chance to answer her. She stands up and begins walking to the door. When she's at the door, she turns around though. I can see on her face that she's confused. That she's starting to panic.  
"Okay, Sunny, calm down. I'll take you to Doc and we'll ask him to check you out." I take Sunny's arm gently and turn her back around so that she's facing the door again. We walk out and go to the hospital.

"I expected to see you earlier this afternoon," Doc says as I walk in. I just look at him and he sees Sunny walking behind me. He understands that I don't want him to say anything about me wanting to talk to him earlier. Doc and I have become good friends, we don't always need words to understand each other.  
"What's going on with Sunny? Why are you both here?"  
Sunny tries to talk but she can't seem to find the words, so I explain for her. I tell Doc we think she might be pregnant and ask if he has any way of making sure. Outside the caves, in the hospitals, you can do an ultrasound or a test. But an ultrasound requires power, so that's not working here. And I really don't know if Doc has any tests. It's not a necessity, like pain medication. To my surprise, Doc says he does have tests. He explains to Sunny how it works and asks her to test in the back of the room. Sunny looks at me, sighs and goes to take the test.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about Wanda?"  
"Oh, I'm sorry Doc, but I really rather not right now. I'm kind off worried about Sunny."  
"Of course, I understand. But was it something important? Do I need to take some time for you tonight?"  
I think about it but immediately discard the idea. Ian will be late after working on the field. I don't want him not to have warm dinner, so I'll stay in the kitchen for him, Kyle and Jamie. After that Melanie and Jared will probably be back, which means we'll all stay and talk in the kitchen. I know Ian will be upset if I leave then.  
"No, thank you Doc, it can wait."  
Doc looks at me and I know he really wants just a hint about the reason I wanted to talk to him. But I keep looking the other way and wait for Sunny. Just as Doc starts to say something, Sunny comes back. We wait for a few minutes in silence. Sunny can't sit still. And then we look at the test. Doc gasps. Sunny becomes even paler. And I feel a pang of jealousy in my stomach.

Sunny is pregnant.

"I'm going to have to take some blood to determine how long you are pregnant." Doc looks at Sunny, but she's not responding. He tugs her arm lightly but she just yanks her arm away from him.  
"I can't be pregnant! I need another test!" Sunny is about to get hysterical. I look at Doc for help. And then he slaps her in the face. Both Sunny and I are stunned. The room is quiet.  
Doc looks at Sunny. "I'm so sorry for doing that, but I needed to calm you down. Now, you are pregnant, we know that. I can assure you that another test is not necessary. With all the symptoms you have and this positive test, we know. I just need to draw some blood so that I can test how long you're pregnant. Wanda said your last bleed was three months ago? So did you skip two months? Sit down, let me draw your blood."  
The doctor inside Doc is fully present now. Sunny sits down and Doc draws her blood.  
Then he looks at me. "I don't know what your plans for today are, but I'm going to ask you to take care of Sunny today. You can't leave her alone until she's fully realized the situation and she won't flip out because of it anymore. Will you do that for me?"  
"Of course Doc, I'll get her to her room." I'm looking at Sunny, she's just sitting there, quiet and still. I take her arm. "Come on, Sunny, let's go."

The room Sunny and Kyle have is not big. After Ian kicked Kyle out of his room so I could get in, Kyle had made Walters room bigger, so he and Sunny could stay there. But it's only big enough to hold a bed and a small closet. That doesn't really matter, because no-one really has that much clothes to put in a closet. Sunny has tried to decorate the walls by drawing on them. I see she is quite good at it. The flowers she drew are beautiful. And at the ceiling it's like you're actually looking at the sky. She made the closet look like a part of the room by making it look like a tree. The branches go all the way up to the ceiling. It's the first time I'm in here. I didn't expect that Kyle would be willing to stay in a room decorated like this. But he must like it, since he hasn't objected or moved out yet.  
Sunny and I sit down on the bed. She doesn't look like she's going to say anything or that she wants to. I don't know what to say to her. All her symptoms, I have most of them myself. I feel like I don't even need a test. I'm almost positive that I'm pregnant as well. But the difference is that she _knows_, she took a test. I can't be _certain_ until I do take a test. When Doc gave her the test I saw he has more, so I can just take one tomorrow. I feel a bit uncertain. It's clear that Sunny didn't expect a pregnancy. And by the way she panicked I'm thinking she's not happy about it. How do I talk to her about this? What do I ask her? Does she need comfort? I feel tired and my back hurts. We have been sitting here for hours, both wrapped in our own thoughts. I can't take the silence anymore.

"Sunny, do you need anything? Do you want me to get Kyle? I can…"  
"NO!" Sunny interrupts me. "Don't get Kyle, I don't want him to know yet. I don't want him to know at all."  
I'm shocked. "You know he'll find out eventually."  
"No, I'm going back to Doc. He needs to get it out."  
"Sunny, that's a waste. We don't waste. We are with humans, we feel like humans, but our goal as Souls is not to waste." I'm even more shocked. How can she even be thinking this?  
"I'm sorry, but I don't care. I know Kyle won't want this. And I don't want it either. I'm going to have to go to Doc."  
I try pleading. "Sunny, please just sleep over it for one night. It will be alright."

But she's not listening anymore. She's walking – no running – out of the room. I follow her, I promised Doc I'd take care of her. We run through the great hall to the crossing of passing toward the hospital. Doc is just coming out of the passage. I think he must be heading to the kitchen for dinner. The dinner I was supposed to cook. I hope someone took over for me, maybe Lilly or Heidi.  
Sunny doesn't even see Doc but runs straight into him. "Oh, Doc, you're here! I need you to help me!"  
"Ugh." Doc isn't small and Sunny is, but she almost knocked him over right now. "What's wrong Sunny, are you in pain? What do you need my help with?"  
"Sunny…" I try to warn her, but she just keeps on shouting.  
"You need to get it out Doc. I can't have it. I won't have it. You need to get it out!"

Sunny is facing me and Doc, she's with her back to the passing to the fields. And the boys are just getting back. Jamie and Ian just looked shocked, Kyle doesn't move a muscle. And Sunny still doesn't realize.  
"I know you can do it, I know it's done. Take it out Doc." She grabs Docs arm in an attempt to get him with her to the hospital. But Doc grabs her arms instead and turns her around. And she sees Kyle. Kyle, who is definitely not happy.

"You are pregnant?" And then he hits her. "You can not be pregnant. That is still Jodi's body! I was going to have children with her someday, not with you!"  
I jump in front of Sunny and push her back. I can feel that Doc is trying to pull me away, but I'm already on the ground, Kyle pushed me aside and is trying to get to Sunny again, Doc is trying to hold Kyle back, but Kyle manages to give her a kick in the stomach. My own stomach turns because of it, he knows that there's a baby in there, how can he do that?  
"Wanda!" Jamie is already next to me, trying to help me up, but I can't get up. I know that I can't.  
Doc can't hold Kyle any longer so Ian steps forward and hits Kyle in the face. Kyle drops down to the floor.  
Jamie is still trying to help me up. But it's no good.  
"Please help Doc with Sunny Jamie. She needs to be calmed down." I try to get him away from me. I'm in so much pain. This, also, is so different than when I was in Melanie's body. That body was used to pain, this body isn't. I really want Jamie to let me just sit. It's hard to concentrate.

"But you're hurt. I need to get you up, maybe to the hospital." Jamie protests.  
"Jamie please, just help Doc with Sunny." Doc was checking on Kyle who seems to be fine, just unconscious. Jamie gets up and walks towards Sunny. She's crying and won't get up.

Ian takes charge. "Jamie, go warn Jeb. Tell him we need someone to lift Kyle to bed – again. Doc, she's not that heavy, can you lift Sunny and take her to the hospital?" Ian kneels beside me. "Are you alright? Did you hit anything? Can you get up or do you need me to carry you?" I can hear he doesn't understand why I'm not getting up.  
I am so happy that it's dark in this passage. No-one can see details in here. I don't want Ian to carry me. But I can't get up either. I really can't. The pain is so overwhelming, the cramps are too much to take. I can feel the blood on my legs. And I just start to cry.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 4.**

Ian sits down and pulls me to his lap. He doesn't say anything, he just holds me. He doesn't ask me anything; and that's a good thing, I don't think I can talk right now. After what seems like forever to me, Ian sighs. He picks me up and starts walking out of the passage. I just hold on tight and don't even bother looking at where we're going. I really don't care. He can take me to our room or to the hospital, as long as I can lie down, I'll be okay.  
When we walk through the great cave, I can hear people gasping. Maybe someone wants to ask Ian what's going on, but with the pace he's keeping up, he's not letting anyone interrupt him. I keep my face on Ian's chest. How long will it last until he realizes? My blood must be all over him. Hasn't he looked down yet? I feel the air become colder and notice with closed eyes that it's darker again. I can feel where he's going; he's taking me to our room. Ian lies me down on the bed, walks to the closet and takes out a lantern. He puts the lantern on and I can see him now. I want to close my eyes again, but I don't. I have to face this. Ian turns around.

"What happened?! Why are you bleeding? I need to get you to doc." He almost drops the lantern and lifts me up from the bed again.  
"Ian… no…" After all that crying my voice is raspy. Ian doesn't hear me. He's holding me and starts walking to the door. I try again.  
"Ian, no, I don't need to go to Doc, really. Put me back down please." I know he heard me this time, but he doesn't stop walking.  
"Really, put me down."  
"I have to get you to Doc, I don't get why you're bleeding. You fell, did you fall on something pointy or hard?" Ian's holding the door already. If I don't stop him he's going to take me to Doc. And that's not necessary.  
"Ian. Put me down. You don't have to take me to Doc, I don't need to see him." Even when he thinks I'm wrong about something or not taking good care of myself, Ian will let me decide. He wants me to always know that I have the right to decide about myself. Only when he thinks I'm being to selfless, he just does whatever he thinks is needed for me. Just like other times, he's letting me have the benefit of the doubt first. So he walks back to the bed and puts me down.

"What's going on then? You know what this is? Why are you bleeding?"  
I really don't want to tell. And for a minute, I _can't_. Another cramp engulfs me and I put both my hands on my stomach. Ian's watching me and waiting. I sigh, swallow and take a deep breath.

"Ian, I'm having a miscarriage."

Ian falls dead silent. He sits perfectly still, I can see all of his muscles are tense. I don't know what to say now. Does he want me to say anything? What is he thinking right now?  
After a few minutes, he speaks: "How long?"  
I'm confused. "What?"  
"How long have you been pregnant? How long have you known?"  
"I didn't _know_. I realized this morning that I missed my period for two months. I wanted to go talk to Doc so that he could help me find out for sure. I didn't tell you yet, because I wanted to be sure first. I know you don't want children…"

"Wanda! I always want you to tell me everything. When there's something bothering you, I want you to tell me. Whenever there's something wrong, I want you to tell me. So I can help you, so we can face things together. What did you think I was going to do, act like Kyle did?"  
I keep quiet. I'm thinking over what he said. No, I know he wouldn't act like Kyle. Ian wouldn't hurt me. Ever. But he said this was wrong. My heart sinks. He must be mad that I was pregnant. I can see Ian looking at me. He takes my hand.  
"Tell me what you're thinking Wanda."  
I mutter: "You must be relieved."  
"Relieved? Why?"  
"You don't want children; you told me you don't want to bring children into this world. You must feel relieved now. "  
Ian pulls me closer to him. "I am _not_ relieved. No, I don't want to bring children into this world. Not the way this world is. But relieved? How could I be relieved that our child died?"  
He stands up and pulls me up with him. My stomach doesn't like that and I almost fall back, but Ian sweeps me into his arms.

"I'm taking you to Doc."  
"Why? That's not necessary, it happened already, there's nothing Doc can do."  
"Of course there is, I want him to give you some pain medication."  
"I don't need pain medication, I can handle this." Ian sighs.  
"Wanda, I know you. I know you must be grieving right now. You don't need physical pain added to that any longer. I won't have it. I'm taking you to Doc." He opens the door and walks out of the room. When he's halfway down the passage I realize we have to go through the great cave again in order to get to the hospital.

"Ian, stop. Please. I'll let you take me to Doc. But please, let me change first. I don't want to go through the great cave in these clothes again. Everyone already saw, this time they won't let you just walk by again." Well, they'll ask questions anyway, but I'd rather have some decent clothes on.  
"You're right. Let's get you into some clean clothes. I didn't bring any though."  
"That's okay, get me to the cave first. I'll wash up and you can get me some clothes."  
I hear Ian groan. "I'm not leaving you alone now."  
"Okay, take me back, let's get some clothes."  
With such a sudden move that it makes me dizzy, Ian turns around. We can hear voices through the passage.

"Wanda! Ian! Are you guys there?" Jamie's calling out to us.  
"Well, they must be, everyone saw them go this way." That's Jared, he and Melanie must be back.  
"Do you know what happened Jamie? Trudy told me Wanda was covered in blood."  
"Kyle shoved her over, Mel."  
"Why would he do that? Didn't he get over that thing against her months ago?" I can hear Melanie's mad.  
They turn around the corner. And Ian takes charge of the situation.  
"Please stop, we're right here." Jamie and Melanie start talking but Ian doesn't let them finish.  
"Wanda was hurt and I want to get her to Doc. But she wants to change clothes first. I didn't bring any clothes and I don't want to leave her alone to clean up, so Jamie, can you please get her some clothes?"  
"Of course, but what happened? Are you okay Wanda?"  
"Please, Jamie, we'll talk about this later, but please, get Wanda some clothes now." I'm glad Ian's sending Jamie away. Jamie is really not a kid anymore, but he's no adult either. I don't want to think about explaining all of this to him now. Jamie walks off and Ian turns to Melanie.  
"Can you help her clean up? I can do it, but I think she might be more comfortable with a woman right now." If Melanie's having thoughts on this she doesn't let it show.

We all walk to the bathing cave. Ian puts me down on my feet and even though it still hurts, I can walk now. Melanie puts her arm around my waist and helps me in. I sit down and take off my clothes. Standing up and walk to the water will hurt too much so I opt on sliding towards it. I can feel curiosity radiating of Melanie, but she doesn't press me. Jared isn't as patient though. Since Melanie and I aren't talking, we can hear Jared and Ian right outside the cave.  
"What is wrong with Wanda? Jamie said Kyle shoved Wanda out of the way. But even if she made a bad fall, she shouldn't be bleeding that much. And why did Kyle shove her?"  
"Kyle was mad at Sunny, Wanda tried to protect Sunny and then Kyle shoved her out of the way. Wanda was pregnant. The fall made her miscarry."  
There's a silence outside the cave. I can feel Melanie's eyes on me. She doesn't say anything but helps me wash the blood of my legs. She normally can't keep quiet. I remember how that was in my head; she kept talking when I rather had her to leave things alone. But now she doesn't say anything and just helps me. I'm very thankful for that. I really don't want to talk right now. I can't even think about how to explain this all to Doc when we get there.  
Jamie arrives with the clothes and Jared and he walk away. In the distance I can hear Jamie saying he wants to stay with me, but apparently Jared is not letting him come back. Melanie helps me put the clothes on. She helps me up and I come stumbling out of the cave. Ian watches me for two steps and then lifts me up again.

"Ian, I can walk, really."  
"Maybe, but you don't need to."  
He walks to the hospital at a quick pace. Melanie comes with us. I'm glad she'll stay with me for now. In the hospital Ian puts me on a bed and asks Melanie to sit with me. Doc's standing up, but Ian is already at his desk. I hear Ian explain everything to Doc and then Doc gets some medication. He walks up to me and tells me just to relax and sleep. Ian lies next to me and I immediately drift off into a dreamless sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. ****I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 5.**

I wake up from people talking. Jamie's on the bed next to me. Of course he had to come and stay with me. I love that boy so much, he truly is my little brother. I wonder what they told him when he came. Melanie must have explained to him. He's sleeping, but I keep looking at him, I love to see him sleep so peacefully. The voices behind me go from a hushed tone to a normal volume.  
"I really think you should leave Kyle."  
"I want to talk to Sunny Doc."  
"I don't think Sunny will want to talk to you. And I don't want you anywhere around Wanda right now, do you realize what you've done? She miscarried!" I can hear Ian's trying to hold back his anger.  
"What? Miscarriage? Doc said Sunny was just fine."  
"Not Sunny! Wanda! Wanda was pregnant as well. And she lost the baby because you shoved her out of the way. You did this. Really Kyle, get out of my sight, I don't want to even look at you right now."  
I sit up. "Kyle didn't know Ian, it's not his fault." The three men look at me, they didn't realize that I'm awake.  
"Of course it's his fault, it doesn't matter whether he knew about the pregnancy or not, he shouldn't have touched you."  
"Hey, I didn't realize what I was doing! When Sunny told me about the pregnancy all I could think about was that that's Jodi! Jodi is in there! I flipped out."  
"What are you talking about, Jodi's gone. Sunny said she couldn't find her."  
"Just wake her up and ask her. Ask Sunny about it."  
And then Sunny sits up as well. "There's no need to wake me up, I'm awake already. I want to talk to Wanda. I want to talk to another Soul. Please."  
Nobody makes a move. I can see that the men are not about to leave the room. So I try to take charge.

"Ian, try to get Jamie to his own bed without waking him up. If that isn't possible, just let him walk. Doc, take Kyle somewhere to calm down – again. Give us some time and privacy here." I look at Ian and try to make him understand with my eyes. I want to know what Kyle's talking about. And Sunny wants to talk to another Soul, she won't talk with the men here.  
Ian is the first to move, he comes over to me and gives me a kiss. Then he takes Jamie – of course he doesn't wake up, when that boy sleeps, he sleeps like a rock. Doc grabs Kyle's arm and they walk off as well. Now it's just me and Sunny.

Sunny walks up to my bed. I can see she's hesitating. And to be honest I really don't want to talk to her. I really don't feel like comforting her. I know it's selfish, but right now I just don't care. I lost my baby and she didn't. It doesn't seem fair, all that happened to me was a shove and I fell, she got hit and kicked. And I miscarried, she didn't. I'm being selfish. Yes, I know. But right now, I really don't want to care about that.  
But I promised her I'd talk to her. And I really do know that it's not fair. She can't help what happened to either of us. It's not her fault. So I'll listen to what she has to say.  
Sunny is sitting on the bed beside mine, but it doesn't seem like she'll start talking anytime soon.  
"What do you want to talk to me, Sunny? What is it you need another Soul for?"  
"It starts with a bit – well more than a bit – of explaining. I hope you will hear me out entirely."  
I wonder what that is about. Does she think I might not let her finish?  
"I'll try to just hear you out."

"You know I love this world. I love earth. I love life as a human being. And I didn't want to leave when Kyle first came and took me. I didn't want to go away. And I told him Jodi wasn't here, that she wouldn't come back, but of course, he tried anyway. And she wasn't here, in this body. I was so glad that Kyle had decided to put me back. Because, of course, I was already in love with Kyle myself. Jodi's body was in love with him and her memories made me know him. Even though Kyle chose me to stay in this body, he did make it very clear that he only wanted me to find Jodi. I know he has grown to like me, but not really more than that. I'm a good substitute for Jodi. But I'm not Jodi. So I know that if Jodi would come back, Kyle would let Doc take me out and sent to another planet. And I don't want that! I want to stay!"  
"I know you do, Sunny, but we did already talk about this. If a person is still in there, it's the right thing to do; we have to give them their bodies back." Where is she trying to get to? What is she trying to tell me?  
"Yes, I know what you said. At first I thought that if Jodi came back, I might get a body like you. Someone who's body really is empty without a Soul. So that I can stay as well. But even though Kyle is kind, he doesn't love _me. _He loves Jodi. Still. Even though she wasn't here, he still loves her."  
Wait. _Wasn't_? What is she saying?  
Sunny continues: "Every evening when we were alone, Kyle would ask me about Jodi's life. What I remember about the life Jodi had before I came into her body. He had me describe all sort of things in finest details. Child hood memories. Dates he went on with her. I thought it was just because he wanted to hear about her life. That he wanted to remember the time he had with her. But it wasn't. He wanted to see if a memory would maybe trigger Jodi's return. All this time he has been hoping for her to come back.

And then she did. At first it was just faint. I noticed my mind responding to things. They weren't feelings or thoughts. It was just a faint feeling that I wasn't the one having those reactions, deep inside. After that she began to try and talk to me. I blocked her out at first. I didn't want to listen to her. I didn't want to acknowledge her. Because her being here means I have to leave."  
Sunny falls quiet for a moment. I don't know what to say. I'm shocked at what she's saying. I know she doesn't want to leave. I know that. But as a Soul, we are only supposed to want good. To want the best. Her denying Jodi her right of existence, I can't understand it. I really don't know what to say. So I keep quiet and hope she will continue. After a while she does.

"_I_ am in love with him."

And I know what she means. When I was in Melanie's body, I felt in love with Jared. But I wasn't really. The body was. And that did influence my feelings. But I, the Soul, was not in love with Jared. I fell in love with Ian. But Sunny, Sunny the Soul, is in love with Kyle.  
"I thought about moving into another body like you did Wanda. A body where no-one is inside. But if I do that, I'd still be here. And Jodi will have her body back. And Kyle will be in love with Jodi. And I'd have to watch them everyday. I can't do that. I don't think I can live through that. But I lay awake almost the entire night. I can't do this anymore, I want Kyle to be happy. I know he's unhappy without Jodi."  
"Kyle…"  
"…Knows. He has known for a few weeks now. That's why I didn't want a baby. I knew he'd be mad. I knew it would make him want Jodi back even more than he did before."  
"I don't get it, Sunny, why didn't Kyle tell anyone? Or go to Doc with you sooner? How and when did he find out?"  
"Kyle started noticing that I seemed far away sometimes. Like thinking to myself. He mirrored that to what you did when you were in Melanie's body. It looked like you were having conversations with yourself. He saw that happen to me. After that, he noticed that I couldn't remember little things I had said or done. Like telling him that I love him in the laundry room, or sitting on his lap in the kitchen. He realized Jodi was taking over. He realized she was back. And he confronted me about it. He told me I had to leave. He pleaded. Told me I'm a very nice Soul, but not his Jodi. He needs his Jodi back. And I told him I'd rather have this body gone with me than leave myself."  
I stiffen. I didn't expect anything like that. She threatened to take hers and Jodi's life away from Kyle. I can understand why he didn't tell anyone. He must have been too afraid of losing Jodi forever. If Sunny couldn't keep Jodi's body, she'd make sure Kyle wouldn't get it either. I grew more and more uncomfortable. Who was this Soul in front of me?

Sunny looked at me. "I can see you're mad. And you should be. I was wrong. And I wouldn't have done it. I love Kyle too much, I wouldn't take Jodi from him. I was just desperate to stay. But Jodi is fading again. All this time, she was just mad at me. She just wanted me to leave. I could deal with madness. But now, she's hurting. A lot. She wants to have this baby with Kyle. She stopped fighting me and hasn't talked to me since yesterday when I found out about the pregnancy. I can feel that's she's trying to make herself go away because it hurts her too much to stay. I need to leave."  
Sunny is sitting on that bed, crying. And I can't help myself. Yes, I'm mad at her. Yes, I think she has to leave. She is so wrong for what she has been doing. But I can't help myself. When I see someone in pain, I want to comfort them. I get out of my bed, sit next to Sunny and put my arms around her. Sunny cries even harder. Right now, she just needs someone for _her_. So I just sit with Sunny until she calms down and relaxes in my arms.

After a while Sunny calms down. "Wanda, I wanted to talk to you because I need you to do it now. I want to do it right away. Before I can change my mind and before someone comes back. I don't even want to say goodbye to Kyle. Will you please do it now, Wanda?"  
"I don't know if that's a good idea Sunny." I'd rather just wait for Doc so he can do it. It would be more comfortable for Jodi as well, having Kyle here when she wakes up. But I can understand why Sunny wants it this way. When I decided to leave Melanie's body, I didn't want anyone here either. And I went to the person I knew I could trust with the job. Doc. So I can understand why Sunny wants this. Sunny starts to say something, but I'm first.

"Okay, I'll do it."  
Sunny relaxes. But I can see in her eyes that she's really sad.  
"Sunny, it will be okay. I'll make sure nothing happens to you. Everything will be fine."  
"I don't care what happens to me Wanda. I don't have the desire to go to another planet. All I want to do now is make Kyle happy."  
Sunny let's go of me so I stand up and walk to Doc's desk. I get the medicine I need, a scalpel and a tank.  
"I can't turn you around when I've used Sleep. So please lie down on your stomach now."  
Sunny lies down and I want to give her Sleep.  
"Wait. I know that Jodi could tell him all of this, but she is too mad at me. Tell Kyle for me that I honestly love him."  
"I will Sunny, I will tell him."  
Sunny puts her head down and I give her Sleep, a tear falls down her cheek. Then I put No Pain under her tongue. I get the hair out of her neck for a clear working area. First I open up the tank next to me. Now I need to make the incision. I really don't want to do this. But I promised her, so I make myself do it. I cut the hole and get Sunny the Soul out. Just like every other Soul, she's beautiful. I put her in the tank and close it. Then I return to the body – Jodi now. I use Heal and then Smooth, so the wound is healed and almost no longer visible. And now all I have to do is wait. I don't know how long it will be before she wakes up.

How long has it been since the men left us? I take the tank to the other side of the room, no need to leave it right next to Jodi, I don't know how she will react when she wakes up.  
After a while I hear footsteps in the hall. And Jodi stirs. As I sit down next to her, she sits up. She looks at me, but immediately shifts her focus to the doorway.

"Kyle!"

_Author's note: I love to read what you guys think! Reviews would be great :-)_


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 6.**

Jodi jumps up and runs at Kyle. He doesn't seem to get it. First sunny is mad at him, won't talk to him and now she's running to him?  
"Sunny, really, you need to leave. I'm assuming you told Wanda everything. I hope she made you see. You have to leave. I'm sorry. But you do."  
"I'm not Sunny." Kyle looks even more confused.  
"What are you talking about Sunny?"  
"I'm not Sunny, stop calling me that! I'm Jodi, Sunny left!"  
"What?" Kyle's looking around bewildered. "Where is she? How did Sunny leave?"  
"Sunny told Wanda to take her out and so she did." Kyle shouts out and picks her up, he holds her tight. Jodi looks at me. "I have to thank you Wanda."  
I feel shy under her gratitude. Then Kyle walks up to me and pulls me into a hug. Auch, that hurts. I try not to grimace, but my body does it before I can help it. Kyle let's me out of the hug and holds me by both shoulders. He opens his mouth to say something.

"I thought I told you to stay away from my girlfriend Kyle. Why is there screaming in here?" Ian is beside me before I even realized he's in the room. He –gently- pulls me away from Kyle and we just stand there.  
"Ian!" Jodi calls out to him. She walks up to him, but Ian steps back.  
Jodi mutters to herself: "I'm going to have to go through that with each and every person here aren't I?"  
Ian is just as confused as Kyle was. He's suspiciously looking at Kyle, who now walks over to Jodi and pulls her close to him again. I think I need to explain to Ian, but of course, he figures it out on his own before I can say anything. He is really observant. He always noticed the changes in Melanie's body while I was in there. And he immediately knew I was gone from Melanie's body. And at an instant, he also knows that Sunny's gone.  
"Jodes! You're back! But what happened with Sunny?" Jodi starts to explain everything that happened.  
I smile to myself and try to walk out of the room. But Ian pulls me back by my wrist.  
"Stay."  
"Ian, this is a family thing, I don't belong here."  
"You _are_ family Wanda, stay."  
Kyle looks at me. He doesn't say a thing, but I can see that even he agrees with Ian. So I lean in on Ian and listen to Jodi explaining everything.

After about an hour Kyle and Jodi leave. They want to spread the good news around. Now that they are gone I tell Doc where the tank with Sunny is. He promises to keep it safe until the next raid, so she can be sent off. Doc wants to do some more tests on me to make sure that my recovery's good. I feel good, a bit sore in my stomach and I'm really tired. I've only been awake for about two hours now, but it feels like a complete day.

Jamie walks in with breakfast for Doc, Ian, himself and me. He puts the plates down and pulls me into a hug.  
"I'm so sorry about what happened Wanda." He says it with so much genuine sorrow for me that it makes me teary eyed and I feel a lump in my throat, so I just smile at him.  
"I brought scrambled eggs! Jared and Mel came back with eggs yesterday." That gets me curious. What were they doing out there? How could they come back with eggs? With me going on raids for food, supplies and medicine there is no longer a need to endanger themselves to steal eggs. Maybe they were feeling adventurous and wanted to steal something. But even that's hard to imagine. After all that has happened Jared's just too cautious to do things like that.  
Jamie talks enough for all four of us, so I just sit in silence, listen to him, smile when needed. After everyone's finished I get up.  
"Well, thank you for breakfast Jamie. I'll just go and get the plates to the kitchen, see if I can help out."  
"Oh, no you're not! You are taking a day off." Ian takes the plates from me and shoves them into Jamie's arms.  
"I like to help out, and I like to keep busy."  
"We are going out Wanda."  
"Out? What do you mean out?"  
"I mean out. You need some fresh air. And you need to calm down. Your body needs rest."  
"Ian, I really feel fine."  
"Maybe, but you're still keeping rest for at least a day. And if I get my way, two days more."  
Two more days? He can't be serious. I can't just slack around for three days. I know he does mean it though. And I also know that there will be no talking him out of it. How I love that man. He takes even better care of me than I do. And I do love him for it, even when I'm reluctant about just doing nothing.  
Jamie takes the dishes with him and Ian and I walk towards the great cave. I assume we're going to our room to get some stuff. Maybe even get something to eat and drink from the kitchen if we're staying out for more than an hour or two. But right before the turn to the great cave Ian pushes me into a hollow in the wall. I gasp for breath because of the sudden movement.

"Don't do that to me again, Wanda. You can't make me worry for you. When something is wrong, or when you even think something is wrong, you need to tell me. I want to know every little thing that goes on in that head of yours." Ian kisses me passionately. I'm gasping for breath again, but now it's because of the fire between us. I can't think straight anymore. I melt away under his touch, his hands go up my arms, to my shoulders and back down against my back. I want to be as close to him as possible. When Ian pulls back a bit I make a disapproving sound, but then I hear a chuckle in the passage. Melanie and Jared are standing there. Of course, my cheeks burn immediately.

"I heard you're taking Wanda out, Ian," Melanie says.  
Ian doesn't even bother to look at her. "Yep, we're taking a day off together." His fingers keep drawing circles on my back. Why does he do that? They are standing just there and I can't concentrate. This is inappropriate. I have the urge to slap his hand away, but I'm locked in his hold, I can't possible reach him.  
"So," Jared starts "do you think you two would like company?"  
I'm out of breath but I manage to answer "Of course we"  
"Don't" Ian interrupts me. "We'd really like to spend some time alone today, Howe."  
When Ian and Jared call each other by their last names, we all know to take them seriously. So Jared doesn't press it. Ian's hands keep going lower on my back. I'm starting to get a bit nervous here.  
"Well, alright. We'll talk to you two later then. It's best not to go through the great hall though. I think everyone will stop you in your tracks. Firstly; they all want to ask Wanda about what happened to Jodi and Sunny. Secondly; Jeb told everyone at breakfast why Wanda was in the hospital. The girls are all ready to smother her with kindness."  
"Thanks for the warning Mel. We'll take the exit at Docs place."  
"Have fun…" Jared laughs and he and Melanie walk off. Ian is seriously starting to kiss me now. I squirm a bit under his arms and he immediately stops. He looks at me, his eyes are dark.

"What is it?"  
"We can't just stand here feeling each other up. There is a time and place for that and that is not here and now. Anyone could just walk into the passage and see us"  
Ian grins at me. "Well, let's find someplace private then." He takes my hand and we walk back through the passage. We find the way out and then we're outside, the wind on my skin feels great. It's a bit cool, but I don't mind that all, my skin is burning.  
We walk a bit and sit down in the sun. We're still blocked by all the rock formations around us, but the sun comes at this spot. Ian pulls me closer to him and starts kissing me again. Off course, anyone could still walk outside and see us here, but this is way more sheltered than in the passage. The only people who know we might be here also know we want to be left alone. I sigh, give in to Ian, pull him to lie down with me and we kiss. I could do this for hours.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 7.**

After a few hours outside Ian got hungry. Of course he was. Ian still didn't want to leave me alone, even if it was for just half an hour. But I wasn't ready to face everyone else yet. So we waited for another hour. We knew everyone would be at work then. We slipped back inside and hid in the passages. I was afraid I would give us away; I kept on giggling, even though I really tried to hold it back. After every turn or so Ian would pull me to him and kiss me again. When we got to the great cave, really no one was there. Even with everybody having to work, there are still usually one or two persons walking around here. We hurried across the cave. Instead of going to the kitchen we decided to go to the storage room and just get snacks. Ian said I deserved it even though I disagreed. I just let him have his way. This body won't let me eat much anyway, so most of it will be for him. When we went back to go outside we saw someone in the great cave; Isaiah. Ian put his finger to his lip and whispered: "Shhhh… You didn't see us." Isaiah just nodded, looking surprised and we walked past him. Once outside we ate some snacks, drank some soda. We hadn't done much more this morning than just kissing and staying physically close to each other.

And now I'm laying with my head on Ian's chest, he's stroking my hair. He just sighed for the third time in a row. I know he wants to talk. Probably about everything that happened, but I'm really dreading the conversation.  
"You know, I'm still debating on what I should do to Kyle."  
I try to push myself up but Ian has his arm firm around me. "He is your brother, you are not going to do anything."  
"Do you really have to keep reminding me of that?"  
"Ian, he ís. You know he didn't mean it. He didn't know."  
"I still don't care about whether he knew or not. He should know by now not to touch you. At all. Ever." He clenches his fist.  
"I can understand why you're upset. I am as well, but getting to Kyle won't change that."

"You are?" Ian sits up and pulls me up with him. He positions me so he can face me.  
"I'm what?"  
"Upset." I'd rather lie down again so I don't have to look at him whilst talking about this. He said he wasn't happy about it. But that's not the same as being sad about it. He's mad Kyle hurt me, but how does he feel about the pregnancy itself? This is hard to do, since I don't know what he's thinking, but as always, I tell him the truth.  
"Yes, Ian, I am. A lot. Of course being pregnant was not part of the plan. But when I miscarried yesterday… It upset me. I would never want to lose a baby. As a Soul, I can not bear the thought of a loss like that."

Ian looks at me. "So it's because you're a Soul, it's a waste to you."  
"No! Well, yes, it is. But this was our baby. _My_ baby. Even though we did not plan it and you were strongly against it, I would have fought for that baby. It was just in my belly for 2 months. And I just knew for one day. But I already loved it."  
Ian's quiet. I keep my eyes focused on the ground. I don't want to look at him. What is he thinking? Will he be mad at me for having wanted this baby?

"Wanda," Ian says, his voice is hoarse.  
I don't look up at him, so he takes my chin. He gently tries to nudge me to look up.  
"Wanda," his voice is even hoarser. I look up and he has tears in his eyes. "Wanda, I would have loved this baby as well. I told you; I'm not happy or relieved about what happened. I am not just mad at Kyle for what he did to you. I am mad at Kyle for what he did to _us_! That was _our_ baby!"  
Ian stands up and kicks at a pile of rocks. I had no idea he would be feeling this way. I thought that he said he wasn't happy about what happened because of me. That he didn't want me to get hurt. But apparently, he cared about the baby as well. It is a relief for me to know that.  
"Ian, come sit down." He looks at me with bewildered eyes. I stand up and take his hand. "Come sit down with me." Ian sits down and we just sit here. It's getting colder and it's getting dark, but I don't care. I'm with Ian. And with Ian I feel like I can withstand everything.

After a while Ian gets up. "You must be cold, let's go inside." He takes my hand and we walk in. It's about dinner time. We debate on whether we should go to the kitchen where everybody else is, or just go to our room and call it a night. I haven't done anything today – well, except for kissing, a lot – but I feel tired. Still, I think Ian could use some company so I opt for going to the kitchen. Anyway, it's better to just have it done and face everybody now.  
When we walk into the kitchen no one seems to notice at first. Everybody's sitting with Kyle and Jodi. Kyle was always psychically close to Sunny, but you can immediately see this is different. It looked like he was protecting her and caring for Sunny all the time. With Jodi, you can see that this is a genuine, equal love. There is no longer that worshiping expression on her face when she looks at Kyle. But the love is radiating of her.  
Melanie and Jared have a table to themselves. I don't want to sit with the big group surrounding Kyle and Jodi and I don't think that Ian wants to. Ian sits me down at Melanie's table and then walks off to get some dinner for the both of us.

"How are you feeling?" Melanie's looking at me.  
"I'm fine. I'll be okay." Melanie reaches across the table for my hand. My sister. After Jamie and Ian I love her the most. I wouldn't be able to leave her either. I hear Kyle calling out to Ian.

"Come sit with us little brother!"  
Ian walks up to Kyle and Jodi. Everyone's quiet now.  
"No. I will not sit with you. I will not talk to you. With everything you did, I kept forgiving you. Every time I wanted to believe that it was just a bad part of you. That you weren't thinking straight. And maybe that was it this time as well. But I'm done, Kyle, I'm done with you. I do not want to sit with you. I do not want to talk to you. I don't even want to look at you anymore." Ian looks at Jodi. "I'm so sorry Jodes, I'm really glad you're back." Then he turns around, takes two plates from the counter and walks back to me. He sits down with his back straight, but I can feel his body's trembling.

"Ian…"  
"Not now. Eat." I just put a hand on his leg and start eating with the other hand.  
On the other end of the room I see Jamie leaving the group; he walks over to us and sits down on my other side. Someone breaks the silence at the other table.  
"Uncle Jeb says we'll have another game tonight. This time all of us. He wants to celebrate Jodi's return." Jamie is overflowing with enthusiasm. I smile at him.  
"That's great Jamie, I hope you have fun." Even when this body is physically healthy I can't participate. The game is too psychical for me, I wouldn't last for five minutes.  
"Aren't you going to come and watch?"  
"I think Wanda will want to rest Jamie." Melanie's trying to rein Jamie in a bit.  
"But it'll be fun! You didn't come yesterday either. Sitting and looking is also resting isn't it?" His face is showing his disappointment.  
"Of course I'll come and watch Jamie." Ian looks at me but doesn't say anything. We finish our meals and he takes the plates to the counter. Every one is standing up and heading toward the game room now. Jared takes Melanie's hands and pulls her up. She laughs when her feet leave the ground because of the speed and strength Jared puts into the lift.

Jamie takes my hand and with the other I take Ian's hand. We walk out to the passage. Jamie is asking Melanie and Jared if they will play. And Ian takes the time to whisper in my ear.  
"Are you really sure you want to go and watch? You don't have to."  
"I know. But Jamie is right. It's just sitting down and watching a game. It'll be fun. And I'll be distracted a bit, that's good."  
"I see what you mean. I'm staying with you though."  
"I know how you love to play, you don't have to stay with me. Please, just have fun."  
"I don't feel like celebrating." I don't know how to answer that.  
In the game room teams have already been formed. Jamie let's go of my hand and runs to the middle of the room to find out which team he has to play with. Ian and I sit down and I get comfortable in his embrace. He is holding me tight and we watch the game in silence.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 8.**

The last few weeks in the caves have been quiet. Life returned to 'normal'. Ian kept me out of chores for a week. I didn't like it, but Doc backed him up on it. I needed to rest to get my body healthy again. I asked Melanie to take Sunny the next time she was going out with Jared. I still don't trust human emotions fully. And I didn't know what Kyle or maybe Jodi would do if they realized that Sunny was still in the caves. Melanie and I decided to send her off to the Dolphins.  
We were running out of fresh items to eat in the caves. I wanted to go on a raid, but Ian objected. He said everyone was fine with what we had. But I felt guilty for not getting fresh stuff in. Ian dragged me to Doc who said that if I rested for one more week, I could go. Ian still didn't feel happy about it, but at least he respected Docs opinion on it.  
It was just Melanie, Jared, Ian and me. Kyle wouldn't leave Jodi's side and she wasn't ready to go out yet. I didn't regret that though. Things between Kyle and Ian have been tense. Ian still won't talk to Kyle and just gets up to walk away whenever Kyle's approaching him. I know that Ian feels even more loss, because avoiding Kyle means he doesn't get much time with Jodi either. She will hardly ever leave Kyle's side. Jodi was a sister to Ian like Jared is a brother to Jamie. He misses her and really wishes he got some more time with her.

Right now I'm hurrying around the passages. I went to wash our clothes, but when I got to the cave I noticed I forgot one of Ian's t-shirts, so I head back to our room to get it. When I walk in the room I hear Melanie talking from another room. I light up. She and Jared just got home last night, they've been out by themselves for a few more times. I didn't get a chance to talk to her last night, I'm glad I'll get to see her now. I walk into the passage with the intention of going into her room when I hear someone talking.  
"Wanda doesn't like me, do you know why that is?" I stand still. It's really nothing like me to listen in on conversations, but I have inherited some human traits and this is one of them. This is about me, I want to know why they are talking about me.  
"Jodi, I don't think you are the problem."  
"Is it because of Kyle? I know from the time that Sunny was in my body that Wanda was nice to her. Is Wanda missing Sunny? She seems to be avoiding me now. And not just when Kyle is around. Whenever we are scheduled in together, she doesn't talk to me at all, unless it's necessary. She seems mad at me."

I immediately feel bad. I haven't been thoughtful enough of Jodi's feelings. Of course she must be thinking I don't like her. But I don't want her to feel bad.

Then Melanie interrupts Jodi.  
"Really, Jodi, it's nothing personal. It's just that you have what she doesn't."  
There's a silence in the room.  
"What are you talking about?"  
"Jodi. You are pregnant. You are growing. You are a reminder of what Wanda lost. I know that she doesn't resent you for it. And she's not mad about it either. But I also know that she must feel pain and loss whenever she looks at you. And in these caves it's really hard to just avoid someone all together. She's not mad at you, she's still grieving."

I'm just standing there. Shaking all over. Melanie's right. I am still grieving. And I didn't even fully realize it myself. But I am also touched by the fact that she still knows me that well. She still knows what I'm feeling. She truly is a sister.  
I want to leave the passage, my emotions are taking over my body and I don't want them to hear me. So I turn around, but then I feel an arm around my waist and a hand on my mouth.  
"Shhh… Don't make a sound. I just want to talk to you."  
I get pulled into my room, but he's not letting go.  
"Don't. Scream." I nod my head and his arms leave my body. I turn around and look at Kyle. He looks at me and seems confused. "Hey, what's wrong with you?"  
I just know I can't answer him right now, so I just shake my head. Kyle just stands there looking at me.  
"Uhm, I'm sorry. But I've been trying to get you alone for some time now. Ian just won't leave your side. You have to get Ian to talk to me again. He leaves whenever I get within a few feet distance from him."  
I manage to blurt out: "Kyle, please, just leave."  
"But you have to help me. I really didn't mean to harm you. You have to get him to forgive me."  
"Kyle, I can't do anything, please leave." Human emotions are taking over me. I'm grieving; can't he see that I really am in no state of mind to talk to him now?  
"Wanda, please, just help me. Just do this for me, I know you can." And then something snaps inside me.  
"Leave! Get out! I can't help you! I want you to leave me alone! Now!" I put my hand over my mouth. I'm shocked myself. How could I burst out like that?

"You heard her. Leave." Relief washes over me. Ian's here. He walks over to me, pulls me into his arms. "What did he do to you?" Then he turns his attention back to Kyle.  
"Why are you still standing there? Get out of our room!" I see Melanie and Jodi standing in the doorway.  
"Hey, bro, I didn't do anything to her. She was already crying when I got here. I just wanted to talk to her. I miss you Ian. You're my little brother."  
"Really, Kyle, how do you always seem to be able to pick the worst times for things like this?! Get. Out!" Ian let's go of me and walks towards Kyle, who takes a step back, holding his hands up.  
"Okay, okay, I'm leaving."  
"Will you talk to me?" Jodi offers to Ian. She looks from him to me with a pleading look on her face. I don't want to deny Ian this. So I just nod. Ian sees it and looks at me. I think I can hear the smallest sigh coming from him.  
"Fine Jodes, you stay." I wipe my tears away and just shake my head lightly at Ian. I know he wants an explanation. But it'll have to wait.

After Melanie took Kyle away Ian sits down on the bed and Jodi takes the chair. I look at Ian.  
"I left our laundry in the washing cave, I should go and get it. Maybe you and Jodi and you should talk…"  
"Stay." Ian interrupts me. He takes my wrist and pulls me next to him on the bed. I can feel by the strength he is using that he doesn't want to let go. "The laundry can wait. I want you here with me." So I just snuggle up to him and look at Jodi expectantly.  
"We haven't really gotten a chance to talk about everything that happened Ian. I think it's time, don't you?"  
"How can you, Jodi? How can you forgive Kyle for what he did? And I'm not talking about what he did to Wanda; I know that doesn't affect you. But for what he did to you. Even if it was Sunny inside you, he endangered your body. Your baby. How can you forgive him for that? I don't know you like this Jodes, you've always stood up against him. Told him when he was wrong. I didn't expect you to forgive him just like that." While he keeps on talking Ian's arm tighten around me. I realize that he feels somewhat betrayed that Jodi isn't mad at Kyle.  
"You are right Ian, you know me better than that. Do you think I just forgave him like that? You _do_ know better Ian." Jodi looks mad at Ian. Is she mad about him being angry at Kyle?  
"At first I was just relieved that I had my body back again. In those weeks that I was back but Sunny wouldn't leave yet, I felt so trapped in my own body. My body. But she wouldn't return it to me. Because Sunny was in love with Kyle as well, I felt so much love for him. So, even though I knew what Kyle did, all I could feel at first was my love for him. After so many years, I was with the love of my life again. We were together. I just didn't think about anything else. For the first day and night I didn't care about anything else.  
And then I did. The second night, when we got to bed, I confronted Kyle. I told him that he was way out of line. I yelled at him. And he cried. _Kyle_ cried. He told me what happened to him that evening.  
He heard Sunny say she was pregnant. And everything went blank in his head. He doesn't even remember what happened or what he said after that. He just completely lost it." Jodi looks at Ian. When she talks again, her voice has a pleading tone to it.

"I didn't _just_ forgive him Ian. I couldn't. But what after Sunny did to him – her not wanting to leave, while he knew I was here. I can understand it. Not his actions. But the fact that he lost it. I can sympathize with it. It doesn't make him right. And it doesn't make your and Wanda's loss any less terrible. But yes, I forgave him. After weeks of despair, he did an awful thing. A thing that can not be overlooked and just forgotten. But I am choosing not to hold him accountable for it."

None of us are moving. Jodi stopped talking a few minutes ago. Ian hasn't said anything yet.  
I can understand Jodi. Love can forgive almost everything. Love can overcome a lot. But can Ian's love for his brother overcome this? We stay quiet for another few minutes and then Ian looks up.  
"I…" He coughs and tries again.  
"I'm sorry Jodi. Thank you for telling us this. But I really don't know if I can. Even with this explanation, I don't know if I can stop holding him responsible for what happened."  
"But he didn't mean to…"  
"I don't care. Right now, I don't care. He tried killing Wanda once and I could forgive him for that. I could see why he would want to do it, I used to agree with him even. But killing an innocent child?"  
"He didn't know…"  
"It doesn't matter if he knew or not. I just need my space from him for now."  
"I can understand that. I'm not giving up though. He misses you. He feels regret and sorrow. Not just for your personal loss, but also knowing that it was his niece or nephew. He also feels it's unfair that his child will get to live, while yours doesn't."  
I'm astonished by what Jodi's saying. I'm having a hard time imagining Kyle with feelings of remorse like that. She looks at my faces and smiles.  
"Off course Kyle would never admit it." Even Ian smiles a little at that comment.  
"Thank you for listening me out, both of you." Jodi nods at us and leaves the room.  
I try to get up from the bed but Ian won't let go of me.  
"I really need to get our clothes now."

"I told you, the clothes can wait." It's nothing short of a growl. "Besides, if they do get 'lost', we'll just get some new ones at our next raid."  
"That would be a waste!"  
"So be it. Do not leave me alone right now. Lie with me."  
"Don't you have something you have to work on?" He wants us to just leave our jobs for the day? We can't do that!  
"I know what you're thinking my Wanderer. And yes we can. We can just lie here and be on our own for just one more hour. Now, I want to know how Kyle made you cry."  
"He didn't." I can tell by his look that Ian doesn't believe me. So I tell him about the conversation I overheard between Melanie and Jodi. Ian just stays quiet and looks at me. He just lies there and holds me. And for now, that's all I need.

_Authors note: I love to read reviews.  
Shout out to the ones I've already got! :-)_


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 9.**

"You won't catch me Mel!"  
Jamie flashes past me. A few seconds later Melanie runs by as well. She will catch him. Jared is the only one who ever outran Mel. And her competitive side didn't like that, so she kept training until not even he managed to beat her anymore. Jared is walking up to me.  
"Where is Ian?"  
"He went ahead to get the jeep to the nearest cave." I told him I could walk to the cave where we hide the cars, but Ian didn't want me to. So he got up early this morning in to get the jeep. Jared smiles.  
"He still isn't letting you make the walk out there?"  
"Of course not."

It has been almost two months since my miscarriage. In those two months I have been going out on two short raids to just get some necessities, Ian wouldn't let me stay out for more than a day. But really everyone in the caves has gotten used to the luxury articles I was able to get them. And we're running out of them, so I convinced Ian I needed to get out.  
When Jared and I get to the end of the cave, Melanie and Jamie are standing there. Jamie's panting, but Mel is relaxed. I don't even ask who won. We walk out of the cave and get into the jeep. Jared gets in the front with Ian; I sit behind Ian, Mel behind Jared and Jamie's in between Mel and me. Ian starts the jeep and we take off. When we get to the cave hiding the other cars, Jared takes the van, Mel joins him and Jamie stays with me and Ian in the jeep.  
It's a long drive. We go to different locations every time we go on a raid. This time we ride a full day. On the way back home we'll be going through different shops. It's sunny out these days, so each time one of the group comes into a store with me, wearing sunglasses. It'll be the first time walking into a store for Jamie. I'm still not comfortable with it, but Melanie and Jared thought it would be good. Jamie really wants to do it and it's been going well for so long that they agreed with him. I'd just rather not have him go anywhere at all, but off course, I can't lock him up.  
When we get to the first motel, Ian let's me out of the jeep at the front door. He's still tense about letting me walk in alone somewhere, but we decided this is the best way. While I book us two rooms, Ian and Jared park the vehicles and everyone waits for me there. We take out the empty suitcases and walk to the rooms. Because of the suitcases there will be no suspicion about the fact that I'm booking the rooms on my own.

Jared and Melanie take one room and Ian and I share the other room with Jamie. Ian pulls me close and easily falls asleep. I can hear Jamie turning in the bed for some time. After an hour, he still isn't sleeping. I sit up.  
"Jamie, are you okay?"  
"Yes, of course I am."  
"Jamie, why aren't you sleeping?" He usually falls asleep just as easily as Ian.  
"It's nothing." Okay, now I know something is up.  
"Jamie, just tell me." I walk towards his bed and sit on it.  
"I'm kind off nervous…" Jamie looks uncomfortable. "I know all of you have done this plenty of times. And I've been with you on raids a lot of times. But I never went into a store myself."  
"Are you scared?"  
"No, not scared, just… I don't know… Anxious, I guess."  
"If you don't want to do it…"  
"I do! I knew I shouldn't tell you, you're not going to let me come anymore, are you?"  
"You can come, Jamie, we already decided on that. I just want you to be sure."  
"I am! I want to do it. I just feel a bit nervous about it, that's all."  
I lie down next to Jamie and hold his hand. "I can understand that Jamie. Try to get some sleep though." Jamie pulls me closer to him, so I just make myself comfortable.

I wake up to a shadow falling over my body. Ian looks at me, smiling.  
"The boy needed some company?" He whispers. I just nod; I don't want to wake Jamie up yet. I take Ian's wrist and look at his watch; 7 in the morning. The stores will be opening in an hour. We need to get up. I regret having to wake Jamie. Just as I want to move, there's a knock on the door. Ian goes to open it and Melanie and Jared walk in.  
Jamie woke up from the knock on the door and now sits up, pulling me up with him. He looks at me, apparently wondering why I am in bed with him. I can see on his face that it's dawning on him. He blushes. I'm glad for him that no one asks anything. While I'm off to the reception to return the keys, the rest take the suitcases back to the jeep and van. We drive off to the first mall. Ian and Jared park on one of the ends of the parking lot. I turn around to look at Jamie.  
"Let's go."  
We walk into the mall and go straight for a clothes store. Jamie seems tense so I whisper to him.  
"Relax, slouch a bit more. Look comfortable."  
In the store we get some men's clothes first and then I pick out some maternity clothes. It's not necessary to get these, but since I'm here anyway, I want to get them for Jodi. I know she will appreciate it. When we get to the counter, the Soul looks at my belly.  
"You aren't showing yet. Are you exited to have a baby? It must be so great to fulfill a calling as Mother." I blush.  
"Oh, no, I'm not pregnant. We're getting the clothes for a neighbor. Her body is not dealing that well with pregnancy, so I offered to get her the things she needs."  
"Oh. I am sorry for being wrong. Tell your neighbor that I hope she'll be feeling well soon."  
"Really, don't be sorry, thank you." I take the bags from her, pass some to Jamie and we walk out of the store back to the parking lot.  
"Wow, that _was_ easy." Jaime looks relieved.  
"Don't think too lightly about it Jaime, it's still dangerous." Jared warns him.

"Well, I'm hungry, let's go get some food Wanda." Melanie and I walk back into the mall. I head for the supermarket to get some sandwiches or something like that, but Melanie really wants fast food. We order some fries and burgers for everyone. Melanie feels comfortable enough out here that when the Soul handing us the food looks puzzled at the amount we take, she explains:  
"Our friends are outside waiting. They are enjoying the sun so much that they didn't want to get inside." The Soul just smiles at her and Mel and I walk outside.

I brought the food for Ian and me and get into the jeep next to him. Jamie gets into the van with Jared and Mel. We finish our fries and throw the package material into the bins outside. Ian nods at Jared and we drive off to our next location.

All day we have been getting clothes and more luxury items. We will get some fresh food when we get close to home. I book rooms at a hotel again. This time Ian and I get to have a room alone. We really need a shower. It was a warm and long day. When I'm in the shower for about five minutes I hear Ian coming in.  
"Do you mind if I join you?" Before I can answer him his mouth is already on mine. His arms are around me and his hands move to my buttocks to lift me up, I clamp my legs around his waist. My back gets pressed to the cold wall and I gasp at the shock of it. Ian tries to pull back and of course it's not like I'm physically strong enough to keep him from it, but I pull him back to kiss him. The streams of water tingle on my already sensitive skin. There is some agitation in my kisses and Ian kisses me back just as heated. I can't think straight anymore, I'm panting for breath and I move my hips.

Ian freezes at the spot. He just stands perfectly still and looks at me.  
"Wanda."  
How is it that he can talk? I'm struggling for breath as it is, let alone that I have to talk.  
"Wanda, how are you feeling?"  
What?  
"I'm fine, what are you doing?"  
Ian takes a towel and puts it around his waist. Then he hands me a towel as well.  
I'm really confused now. What _is_ he doing?  
"I think we need to talk first."  
"What is there to talk about?"  
"Wanda, are you sure your fine? I mean, it's just been two months."  
_Just_ two months? It has been two months. Two_ long_ months. And in those two months he barely touched me. We've kissed a lot. We've cuddled a lot. But he never went further than that. And when he came into the shower I thought that he must be 'over it'.  
"Ian, I'm fine. Really."  
"But…" I cut him off by kissing him. I let go of my towel and pull away his.  
"Ian, believe me. I'm fine. Let me prove it to you." Ian looks into my eyes for a very long time. Then he leans in, kisses me, picks me up and takes me to the bed.


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 10.**

On the last night of the raid Melanie and Jared stay in our room to eat. Normally we just split up immediately as I get the keys to the rooms. When Jamie goes to take a shower, Melanie starts talking.  
"We won't be in our room tonight. So if something happens and you need to leave, just go. Take the van. We'll get the jeep later."  
"What? What do you mean you're leaving? Where are you going? Does this have something to do with all the trips the two of you have been taking the last few months."  
"Yes, Ian, it does. But we can't tell you about it."  
I feel slightly hurt at this comment. Ian apparently feels the same way.  
"What do you mean you can't tell us? Don't you trust us?"  
Melanie looks at Jared, who takes over.  
"We do trust you, it's just better that less people know about this than more. It's got to do with the other humans. We really trust you, both of you. But there is a risk involved here. I'm sorry, we can't tell you."  
"We just wanted you to know that we won't be there in case you'd come looking for us tonight. So don't worry. I doubt anything will happen, if everything goes right, we will just be back in the morning. Don't tell Jamie anything though. I don't want him to worry about us." Melanie looks at the bathroom door.  
"We just wanted you to know in case we aren't back in the morning. It won't automatically mean we got caught, these meetings take time."  
Jared adds: "Just leave at eight tomorrow morning, staying longer will draw attention to you."  
I look Jared in the eyes. He just looks back at me, holding my gaze. I don't like this at all, I don't want to split up.  
"You just make sure you're back here in the morning so we don't have to leave without you."  
The shower stops. We can't talk anymore, Jamie will hear us. Jared and Melanie get up. Jamie comes out of the shower and they wish him goodnight. Mel looks at me one more time and they leave the room.

"Well, I want to watch a movie." Ian gets a bag of potato chips and sits down on the bed with Jamie. Curled up on the other bed I listen to them making fun of the movie. I'm really tired after another day of shopping, so I fall asleep easily. When I feel Ian getting in the bed with me I move over to give him some room. He just pulls me back to him.

"Wake up sweetheart, it's half past 7." I open my eyes to see Ian's face just inches away from mine. He kisses me deeply. Getting up is not one of my priorities right now. Unfortunately it is a priority to Ian. He backs up and looks into my eyes.  
"We really need to get up. The others in the cave are waiting for fresh food."  
"Yes, I know, I know, let's go wake up Jamie and get Mel and Jared."  
Before I can get up out of bed there's a knock at the door. Ian pulls on some pants and opens it. Mel and Jared walk in, Melanie goes to Jamie to wake him up and Jared sits down on the only chair in the room.  
"Aren't you getting up Wanda?" Jared asks me "It's almost time to leave." Jamie was fast at getting out of bed and putting clothes on, so Ian just opens the door again.  
"Bye Jared, we'll see you at the parking lot." Melanie and Jared look at him, stunned. "Get out guys, Wanda needs to get dressed." Ian always understands me. When Jamie sleeps with us I just change clothes in the bathroom. Walking around in underwear and shirt doesn't bother me. Not with Jamie, not with Melanie. But Jared being in here… No, I am not getting out of this bed with him in the same room.

They take off and Ian and I get dressed. Out on the parking lot Ian and I take the van, the others get in the jeep.  
Ian pulls me to him in the car. "Last store for this trip, then we're off to home."  
"Yes. Home." I smile at him. It truly is my home now. I can't imagine living anywhere else. We pull over at the parking lot. Mel and Jamie stay in the van and Jared walks up to us.

"Ready for your last shopping spree today Wanda?"  
"You are coming with me Jared?" Jared rarely comes into stores with me. He always says he's more comfortable being on the look out.  
"Yeah, I'm kind off bored sitting around all day."  
"Okay, let's go." I squeeze Ian's hand and get out of the jeep. Jared takes my hand and we walk into the store. It's the easiest way to get some privacy whilst shopping; appearing to be a couple.  
"What do you want?" I ask Jared.  
"What do you mean?"  
"You only ever come into stores with me when you want to get something for yourself. And then you hide the item at the bottom of the bags. So what is it you want this time?" Jared's face goes from looking surprised to realizing he got caught. Then he smiles.  
"I never figured you caught on to that, you never seemed to."  
I shrug. "I was just happy that you took some things for yourself, you never ask for anything for yourself. I just want to see you happy, Jared." Jared looks a little uncomfortable at me. It can still lead to awkward situations, talking about the feelings I inherited from the time in Mel's body. I still love him. It has become more like a sister-brother-love, but those feelings of a deeper love are in there still. I know that Jared still feels some things too. He usually is very practical, what needs to be done, needs to be done, but sometimes when it comes to me, he becomes almost as overprotective like Ian.

"Jared…"  
"I know what you mean Wanda." He flashes me a crooked smile. "But I didn't join you because I want to get something for myself this time. I just wanted to talk to you, I can never get you alone in the caves. I know you talk to Mel. I know that Ian takes very good care of you. But I just wanted to make sure that you are alright after everything that happened. I figured that maybe you need to talk to someone who hasn't shared your mind, thus knows most of your thoughts before you speak them aloud. And, someone who isn't your boyfriend. Like an outsider."  
"You are hardly an outsider Jared."  
"I know, but I still thought I'd offer." I'm touched by what he's telling me. We all struggled when I came into this new body. But I could talk about that with Ian and Mel. I never discussed it with Jared, the love I still feel for him, yet is so different from being _in_ love with him. And he usually just treats me like a friend. Not distant, but not like close friends either. Underneath the words he is speaking now, he is telling me that he truly cares.  
"Thank you Jared. It was hard. It still is, especially when I look at Jodi. But I really am alright." Jared squeezes my hand.  
"Just know that you can always come to talk to me as well."  
"I do, thank you." I realize we've stopped walking and are just standing here in the middle of the aisle. That is not normal Soul behaviour, we will draw attention like this. I clear my throat.  
"Let's get this shopping over with."

Jared and I get fresh supplies; eggs, cheese, milk, some fruit and vegetables. Jared insists on carrying most of the supplies to the van, I just get to carry one bag. I hoped that my body would gain some more strength if I just made it do things, but if everyone keeps taking things from me, that isn't going to happen. We load everything up and take off again. We're going home.

_Author's note: Short chapter sorry! I really wanted to get into the feelings left between Wanda and Jared.  
Thanks for reviewing!_


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: Off course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 11.**

"You're not allowed to do anything. Neither am I. Let's go wash up."  
It has been extremely hot in the caves. Everyone is sweating just from standing still. But the chores need to get done. Everybody keeps taking work out of my hands – I really need to figure out how to get them to stop doing that. No one will let Jodi do anything anymore because she is six months pregnant now. She was able to do some things still, but the more the pregnancy is showing, the more people take work out of her hands.

"How are you feeling today Jodi?"  
"Oh, really, I'm fine, I'm just frustrated that no one will let me help anymore. Jeb keeps talking about how everyone needs to be 'earning their keep'. I am not earning my keep right now."  
I laugh. "I definitely know how you feel. How is it that you agree with them when no one let's me do anything, but when it's about you, you complain?"  
Jodi looks perplexed. "You are absolutely right, Wanda! I'll lobby for you from now on, so that you can do whatever you want." She has a sarcastic ring to her voice, but I know she's trying to make me laugh. And it works. I laugh again.  
"Well, let's go wash up then."  
We walk to the bathing cave and get in together. Because of the darkness in here I'm absolutely comfortable being in here with another woman. I get in with a sigh of relief. The water in this cave is warm. But it's slightly cooler than the air itself.  
"That does feel good, doesn't it?" Jodi practically moans at the touch of the water.  
We have gotten close the last few months. When we got back from our last raid I brought her the maternity clothes, she thanked me and hugged me. At that, I froze. She pulled back and apologized. "Sorry Wanda, it's just that Sunny used to be physical with you. I'm used to it. I won't do it again." I just answered: "Don't be sorry, it's okay."

After that we talked a lot. Every time when our men would be doing the hard work, we'd get together. There weren't really other options, since all the other women get to do the more physical work. We talked a lot about the time Sunny was in her body. How she found it confusing to have her body back again. She even addressed the situation about her pregnancy and my miscarriage. I didn't feel comfortable talking about it, but at the same time, I was glad that she brought it up. It cleared the air about it.  
Ian seems to be happy that I'm getting close to Jodi. He still has trouble forgiving Kyle though. Two weeks ago Jodi and I were cleaning the kitchen.

_"Well, let's wipe down these tables and make ourselves useful before someone else comes and do it." I usually do this on my own, it's one of the few things they'll let me do. But since no one will let Jodi work anymore either, she has taken up helping me with the few tasks I've got.  
__While I get all the dishes and take them to the counter, Jodi cleans the tables.  
__"Uhmpf." Jodi sits down and takes her belly into both hands. I run over to her.  
__"Are you okay? Are you in pain? Do I need to get you anything?"  
__"No, Wanda, I'm fine, it's just the baby kicking. It can kick quite hard." Jodi looks at me. "Do you want to feel it?"  
__I don't know. It seems quite intimate, touching her belly. But I am curious. So I sit down on the chair next to her and put my hand on her belly. She places her hand over mine and shifts it a bit.  
__"There! Can you feel it?" Yes, yes I can. I smile at Jodi.  
__"That's amazing!"_

_The two of us are just sitting there, when Kyle walks in.  
__"Is the baby kicking again Jodes?"  
__"Yes, come here." Kyle walks over and places his hand on Jodi's belly, next to mine. When he feels the baby kicking he laughs aloud. He repeats my previous comment.  
__"That's amazing!" I can't do anything but smile at his comment. It _is_ amazing.  
__"It really is a wonder, Kyle." I look up and smile at him, but I see Jodi's distracted, she looks the other way. I follow her gaze and see Ian standing in the doorway of the kitchen. He turns around and walks out._

_"Ian!" I get up and follow Ian. "Ian, wait, where are you going?! Ian!" He stops in the middle of a passage and turns around.  
__"I don't know how you do it Wanda! How can you just sit there with him and smile at him. Talk chit-chat with him about pregnancy and babies. You are _too_ good for this world. You just forgive and forget. And go on with your life. I can't see how you can do that."  
__"Ian…" I stretch my hand out to him, but he won't take it, so I just let it fall down to my side again. "Ian, I didn't just forgive him. I felt a lot of anger as well. But I also realize that it wasn't his fault. It was because of him, but not his fault. I can't keep feeling mad. I just can't."  
__"Yes, because you are too good. Because you always want to see the best in people."  
__"Because it's not me Ian. You know that. All the times Jared hurt me while I was in Mel's body. I still forgive him. I forgave you for trying to –"  
__"I didn't know better then!"  
__"Kyle didn't know either." I whisper. We both stay quiet for a few minutes.  
__I reach my hand out to Ian again. This time he takes it. He pulls me close and we just stand there._

After that Ian got more relaxed around Kyle. He still won't talk to him, but he also doesn't get up and leave anymore the second Kyle gets close to him.  
I pull my attention back to Jodi.  
"I'd really rather not come out of this water again. But we'll have to, right?"  
"I'm afraid so. I guess it's about time to get to work on dinner."  
"Let's get our men some water first." Today all the men are working in the field. It's the hardest job in the caves, but it's also the most necessary. We can't survive on raids alone. I just can't get my hands on that much on my own, it would be too suspicious. And the rain will be coming soon, Jeb wants to get everything harvested before that.  
Jodi and I get out of the water, put on our clothes and walk out to the kitchen, to get some water. It's really not necessary to go bring Ian and Kyle water. Getting them water is just an excuse to see them. Human emotions are so special. After almost a year in this body, I still get a warm feeling inside and butterflies in my stomach when I think of my love.  
There are voices coming from the kitchen. Are we late? I didn't think we were in the bathing cave that long that we're too late to fix dinner. Jodi looks towards the kitchen with a similar puzzled expression on her face.

When we walk into the kitchen, Jamie comes running at me.  
"We're done, Wanda! We finished. The fields are empty again. And we managed to get it done before the rain!"  
I'm glad it's done. No one ever complains, but everyone is always relieved when it's all finished up again. It means everybody gets to relax a bit more again.  
Jared comes into the kitchen carrying two boxes. Kyle opens them up.  
"Potato chips! Here, Ian, catch!" He throws Ian a bag.  
"Thanks, Kyle." I notice that Kyle wavers a bit, but he does not want to let it show, turns around and hands out more bags of potato chips. I'm surprised as well, Ian talked to Kyle. Ian walks to me, sees the way I look and just shrugs. So I ignore it. I'm glad he seems to be softening up towards Kyle though.

We sit down at a table and are joined by Mel and Jared.  
"How about we go to the recreation cave, just the four of us?"  
I laugh. "You want me to participate in a game? I can't even run or two minutes straight, let alone play soccer against the lot of you."  
"Which is mainly the reason why I suggested it. You have been with us for almost a year in that body Wanda. It's time that you toughen up." Ian hisses at Jared, who doesn't even flinch because of it. I look at Mel.  
"Well, he is right. I'm not saying or thinking you should become a fighter. You wouldn't fight even if you physically could. But you are still you in that body. And I know you get frustrated at not being able to lift stuff or keep up with Jamie when he runs. We thought it will be good to get you into shape." Mel throws a glance at Ian "_Just_ into shape Ian. Nothing over the top."

"I still don't think it's a good idea."  
"I disagree sweetheart."  
"Why would you need it? You're a Soul, there's no _need_ to run. Because of being a Soul, you're the only one here able to get us the supplies we need. So there's no _need_ for you to do physical work in here, no one minds that you don't. Like Mel said, you wouldn't fight if you knew how to, so there's no _need_ for you to be stronger than you are." I knew Ian would react this way, that's why I never pressed this subject. But with Mel and Jared backing me up, I feel confident.  
"There is. In Mel's body I felt free. I felt I could do whatever I wanted to. I knew that I had endurance. I had muscles, strong muscles. If not for any other reason, I want to be stronger in this body so that I feel more self-confident. I feel very loved and appreciated, but still very weak in this body." Ian's face darkens. And that's why I didn't press the subject earlier. I don't want him to feel bad for me. Or about me. I can see Jared nodding, but I don't pay attention to it. I'm looking at Ian. And he's looking at me. He stays quiet for a long time.

"Okay."


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Thanks so much for reviewing and following my story!**

**Chapter 12.**

"Ugh." My face pulls into a grimace as I throw myself on the bed. Ian sees it and his face does the same. I just finished working out with Mel in the recreation cave. She and Jared have been exercising with me for four weeks now. Sometimes one of them, other times both of them together. Every evening after a training I just come back to my room and want to sleep. I'm so tired. Ian just stands there, looking at me.  
"I really wish you'd stop this 'training'."  
"You said you'd be okay with this. Please hold to that promise."  
"I just hate seeing you in pain."  
"I'm not in pain, really. I'm just sore. It's like all of my muscles are under tension, all the time."  
Ian lies down next to me. "I think I can help with that, I should be able to help you relax." He nibbles at my ear and I giggle.  
"That was not the reaction I was going for Wanderer." Ian pulls me closer to him and kisses me. My hands go to his hair. I try to get as close to him as possible. He is right, I'm already feeling more relaxed than I was. One of his hands is trailing its way up and down my leg, while the other hand is on my back, massaging it. And that feels good; I can feel the muscles loosening up under his touch.  
Ian pulls up my leg, so it's on his side. I take advantage of the situation and roll him over so that I am on top of him. While we keep kissing his hands go from my shoulders to my back, lowering until they find my buttocks.  
"Aren't you tired?"  
I smirk at him. "Be quiet, just kiss me."

I wake up to Ian looking at me.  
"Hungry?" I don't have to answer; my stomach begins to rumbles just as he finishes his question. We both laugh.  
"Okay, let's go then." We get up and put some clothes on.  
"What time is it? I feel like I've been asleep for a very long time."  
"You have been. It's about time for lunch, we skipped breakfast."  
"We what? You skipped breakfast? You should have gone and get something to eat."  
"I didn't want to risk waking you up." Really, he can sometimes be too sweet.  
"Well, you shouldn't be hungry on my behalf."  
"I'm not that hungry, it was way more satisfying to watch you sleep. Whenever I move, you wake up."

I have to admit, my body feels a little less sore because of the rest it got from sleeping this long. Ian takes my hand as we walk to the kitchen. Everybody's there already. It seems more crowded than usually. It also sounds like everybody's talking louder.  
We stand in the doorway of the kitchen and look at the commotion. The center of it seems to be at the counter. Melanie and Jared are standing there, with three other persons. One I vaguely recognize. Ian recognizes him as well and stiffens beside me.

"What's going on here!?" Mel, Jared and the three others with them, turn around. Ian was holding my hand, but now I'm taking two hands to hold on to his arm. My knees are feeling weak. Next to Mel is Burns, and with him two other Souls. What are they doing here? Why are they here? And how could Mel and Jared bring them in here?  
"Okay, show's over everyone. There's still plenty of work to do. Let's go. Move!" Jeb walks through the pack of people, stops at Jared's side and turns around. "Everybody out!"  
No one protests. They know Jeb well enough to realize when he's serious. Ian doesn't turn around though. He walks forward, straight for Jeb, who just looks at him.  
"O'shea…"  
"We need to eat. You're standing in front of the counter. Apparently everybody ate, but we slept in. Just let me get some food for us."  
Ian fills up two plates and stalks out of the room again. He has both of the plates balanced on one hand and I realize I'm still holding on to his arm. Too tight. So I let go, but Ian just takes my hand into his again.

"Let me carry my own plate."  
"I'm fine with it."  
"Ian, let me carry my own plate please." He budges and hands me my plate. It takes me a while to realize we're not heading to our room or any other cave. We're heading outside.  
"Where are we going?"  
"Out."  
"Why?"  
"I don't want you anywhere near them." He must mean the Souls.  
"The fact that Mel and Jared took them here, has to mean that those Souls are on our side Ian, they must have a plan." Ian looks mad and growls.  
"I'm sure they have a plan. Just as I'm sure that that plan will have to do with you. And I don't. Like. That. At all."

When we get outside, Ian places me out of sight. If anyone walks out of the caves now, they won't spot us immediately. We eat in silence. I can sense that Ian's mad.  
"You're jumping to conclusions. We don't know what this is about yet."  
"Oh, come on Wanda! They bring in three Souls. No humans. Just Souls. What else am I supposed to think? Off course they want something from you. You are going to say no."  
"If I can help with something…"  
"No! Not even if you can help, you can't endanger yourself. I can't stand to even think of it. Going on raids is enough."  
I stand up and stretch my hand out to Ian.  
"We don't know anything yet. Let's go find out first."

Burns and the other Souls are still in the kitchen. Mel, Jared and Jeb are with them. Ian stalks forward, he just stops at their table, doesn't even sit down.  
"Why are you here? What do you want?"  
Melanie answers: "Russels cell got caught."  
Ian looks surprised, I can see the anger rolling of his shoulders.  
"Come again?"  
Jared takes over: "Russels cell of humans got caught. Burns and Nick here were out with some of them for a raid, when they got caught. Burns and Nick tried to talk the Souls out of taken the humans, but it didn't work. One Soul did listen and she got Burns and Nick out of there. She didn't succeed in saving the humans present. Russels cell was just 7 people. Three of them got caught during the raid. The other four had stayed behind. Nick is the only one who knows the location of Russels cell. He got the other four humans out and then Burns took all of them to our safe place. We were supposed to meet up there last night. When we found them there, we had no other choice than to take them with us."  
"Then where are they?"  
"We took them to one of the outer caves to get some rest. Burns and Nick stayed with me and Mel to figure out what to do next."  
"But, then who is this?" Ian points to the third Soul.  
Nick answers: "This is the Soul that saved Burns and me last night, her name is Sky."  
Ian looks perplex after hearing at all this information. And I can understand that, I feel overloaded at all of this myself. I'm trying to make sense of it in my head…

"That is what the both of you have been doing all those time you went out on your own! You were having meetings."  
"Yes."  
Jeb speaks up. "Well, we haven't got any spare rooms here either, but the rains are coming soon. So for the time being, we'll just take the new group to the recreation cave to sleep." He looks at the Souls. "The three of you should get some rest as well."  
"But Jeb," Ian says "What do we do after the rains? Seven more bodies in these caves? We're crammed already."  
Jebs eyes flash to Mel and Jared. He looks back at Ian.

"We'll figure that out when it comes to it. The rains will last for at least three months. Plenty of time. Let's go you three, I'll show you where you can get some rest this afternoon." I feel dismissed. Ian clearly feels the same, he has an indignant look on his face, but he doesn't say anything. Jeb and the Souls get up and leave the room. For a while we just sit there in silence with Mel and Jared. Until Jared talks.

"We couldn't tell you. The less people knew about the meetings, the better. It was just Nate, Russel and Burns. Gail and Max got their information from them again. All of us decided that yes, we trust each other, but it's better to know as less details about each other as possible. When we took these seven people, we blindfolded all of them way ahead. They have no idea where they are, apart from the obvious fact that they are staying in a cave."

Ian nods at him. I don't know what to say either. In a way I'm hurt that they didn't trust me – and Ian – enough to tell, but I do understand why they didn't. It is the safest way.


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 13.**

After dinner everyone gathers up in the kitchen. I used to tell stories here. But now that I've been staying here for over a year, people gradually lost interest. After a while there wasn't any new information I could give them anymore. They've heard it all. But now there are three new Souls. Everyone wants to hear what they have to say.  
The four new humans sit on the outer end of the kitchen. Jared and Mel join them. Ian pulls himself up to a table and I position myself in front of him, he wraps his arms around me.

Jeb starts it off.  
"So, we know a lot about Wanda here." Sky looks at me. "What we don't know, is how you guys came to switch sides."  
Burns is the one to talk first.  
"My name is Burns Living Flowers, but everyone just calls me Burns. I came into this body three years ago. I got a love for hiking and forest walks from this body. One day I was walking in the forest and got stuck in a storm. As a Soul, I didn't know what to do. This body didn't have memories of storms either. I was all alone and disorientated because of the storm, so I just kept walking, trying to find a way out of the forest. I heard a loud crack and when I turned around I saw a tree falling right at me. Nate jumped at me and pushed me out of the way. He saved me there."

"He saved a Soul? Why?" The question was not really asked directly at Burns, but he answers it anyway.  
"As I said, I was all alone in the forest. Nate assumed that I was human, because Souls usually don't go into forests by themselves. We tend to stick together.  
Nate and I became friends and I started seeing things from the human side. I started helping him with getting supplies. At first I stayed in the house I lived in, but eventually I decided to go and stay with Nate's cell."

Doc looks at Burns. "Was there anyone with you in that body?"  
"No, there was no one here. I've been alone in this body from the start."  
The room falls quiet. After a few moments Jeb takes the lead again.

"So, what about the other two of you?" This time Nick explains.  
"My Soul name is Ice Writer, but I'm called by the name of this body, Nick. When I was placed into this body, Nick was still here. After a few weeks living with the Souls, seeing Nick's memories and hearing Nick's thoughts, I decided I wanted to help any human survivors. I moved around the country a lot, to try and find humans. And then one night I ran into Russell. It took me some time to convince him I was on his side. But we've been working together ever since. I have been staying in the Soul society, in the house I have there. Off course I can't return to that now after we got caught. They know that I am on the human's side."  
Some people look mad. They look from me to Nick. Ian pulls me even closer to him than I already was. Kyle speaks up.  
"Nick is still in there with you?"  
"Yes, we became friends and are working together."  
"Why don't you just get out?"  
"What?" Nick looks confused and to my surprise, Sky snaps her head towards me. Then she looks at Melanie. Why is she looking at me and Mel?  
"Kyle…" Ian tries to warn him, but Kyle already speaks again.  
"Why don't you just get out of that body? If you are on the human's side, don't you agree that Nick should get his body back?"

I can hear several people in the room agreeing with Kyle.  
"Yeah, get out."  
"Just leave for somewhere else."  
"He deserves his life back."  
"It's what Wanda did." At that last comment, silence hits the room. The three Souls look at me.

"What did you do?" Sky's walking towards me. Ian gets off the table and pushes me halfway behind him. Before I know it Jared, Mel, Jamie and Kyle are standing in front of me as well.  
"How did you do it? You took another body? Did you go to a healer? Or did these humans find out how to extract Souls?" Sky mumbles to herself: "But how _could_ the humans find out?"  
I look her straight in the eye: "I showed them how to do it."  
At this confession Burns and Nick stand up as well. Burns just looks perplex, Nick looks scared at the people around him, but Sky just looks mad.  
"How could you do that! Why would you do that?"  
The room is full of tension now. Jeb walks up to the group surrounding me.

"Please, just sit down again. First of all," he looks at Burns and Nick, "I can promise you, nothing will happen to you here. This is my house, my rules, nothing will happen. Secondly, really, just sit down, so Wanda can explain. This part of the kitchen is getting crowded."  
Jeb gently takes Sky by the arm and guides her back to Burns and Nick. They all sit down again. Jared, Mel and Jamie go sit down on the table behind Ian and me. Kyle looks at Ian, who nods, and then turns back to Jodi. I sigh to myself and take a chair. Ian stands behind me, with a hand on my shoulder. I place my hand over his and start to talk.

"When I got to earth, I was placed in Melanie's body. I was placed into her body, because the Seekers hoped that Melanie knew about more human survivors. They wanted me to help find other humans. Melanie was still in the body and she protected her memories very well. I got to know from her memories that there were other humans, but she wouldn't let me see anything about their whereabouts. After some time, the Seeker – my Seeker – became more impatient and I started to feel more and more with Melanie. I wanted to go see my Healer. Melanie convinced me to come to the caves. We were found by these humans and came here. Other Souls were looking for me but gave up. They thought that I would be dead. But my Seeker didn't give up.  
In here, it became clear that I was valuable. I could get supplies from stores, without having the people here endanger themselves for it. So I helped out as much as I could. When I was out getting supplies, she killed one of the humans staying here and then got caught. The humans wanted to kill her, but I felt that the best thing to do was to take the Soul out of the body and send her off. I told the humans that I would show them how to do this under the condition that no Souls would be killed, they would be sent of to other planets. They all agreed to this condition. And I trust them. They've trusted me with their lives, I trust them with my life and I know they wouldn't betray me.  
After we took the Seeker out and sent her away, I realized I had to leave Melanie's body myself. She deserved her life back. She needed to be back with Jared and Jamie. So I went to Doc and told him to extract me from this body." I don't tell them about how I wanted to die. I know Ian still feels some hurt because of it. And it isn't necessary for this story.  
"Doc took me out. They didn't want to let me go, so they found me another body. They extracted the Soul from it and tried to wake the human up. But there was no longer anyone in this body. So they put me in. The body would've died without me and my friends didn't want me to leave, so I decided to stay in this body."  
During my story a lot of people have left. They already know my story and are probably tired, it's almost midnight. It'll be a normal work day again tomorrow.

Jeb, Doc, Jared, Melanie, Jamie, Kyle and Jodi stayed. On the other end of the room the four new people stayed as well. Each one of them seems lost in thought. The Souls don't say anything after my story.  
"So, all that's left is Sky's story. Who are you and why do you side with the humans?" Once again, Jeb is the one trying to start up the conversation again. It looks like Sky snaps out of her thoughts.  
"Well, I wasn't, really. I didn't side with the humans. I sided with Burns and Nick. When I saw them, surrounded by Souls, they were going to be taken… I didn't want that. I wanted to help them. So I told the other Souls that I would take them with me.  
The Souls were surrounding them and the three humans, but the focus was on the humans. When the Souls walked towards the humans, I asked Burns and Nick to walk with me. I wanted to explain, but they realized themselves that they wouldn't be able to save the humans. They were outnumbered. I think the other Souls thought I was just taking Burns and Nick inside; they just let me whisk them away. When we weren't in danger of getting caught anymore, I asked Burns and Nick where they wanted to go. I am curious. I want to know why they chose this life. So I made a split decision and decided to come with them."  
After Sky stops talking, Jeb gets up.  
"Okay, that will just have to be enough for tonight. We have to get some sleep. Everyone earns their keep around here. And even though we can't provide you with rooms for yourselves, we do expect that you help out. Just come here for breakfast in the morning and then I will assign you some tasks for the day. I asked someone to take some mattresses and blankets to the recreation cave. I'm afraid we're all of out of pillows. I'll show you, let's go."

The humans and the Souls take off with Jeb and Doc.  
Jodi seems tired, she's leaning in on Kyle. He stands up and Jodi wants to get up as well, but he won't let her and just lifts her. She protests a bit, but Kyle won't have it. He can be so much like Ian sometimes. Just like Ian won't let me strain myself, Kyle won't let Jodi do that either. They wish us goodnight and take off to their room.  
I look sideways and see that Jamie fell asleep with his head on Mel's lap. Just as I want to get up, Jared starts talking.  
"So, what do you think?"  
"I don't know what to think about Sky." Ian answers.  
"I noticed that too." Melanie says. "She kept looking at me and Wanda like she _knew_. Even before Wanda told her story."  
It's not like me to be suspicious of others, especially not Souls, so I'm glad that Mel saw it as well.  
"We'll just have to keep a close eye on her then." Jared looks at me while he says it and I realize he says it to comfort me.  
I can't help it, I have to yawn. Ian looks down at me.  
"You're tired, aren't you? Let's get to bed."  
"I'm okay, if you want to talk some more. Or I can just go ahead."  
"Wanderer, from the first night in the recreation cave, I have never let you go to bed on your own. I'm coming with you. Talking can wait, sleep can't."  
Jared takes Jamie and the rest of us get up as well.


	14. Chapter 14

**Thanks for reviewing! I love to read what you guys think!**

**400 reviews… I wish! Thanks for sticking with me and following!**

**Once again: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 14.**

"I'll be working at the mirrors today if you need me." Ian kisses me and leaves me with Jodi. Kyle and he walk out of the room. Ian still isn't entirely comfortable around Kyle. They don't talk like they used to. But they are polite to each other. I'm glad Ian is growing closer to Kyle again. It's going slow, very slow, but at least there is some progress. I'm glad Kyle understands that he needs to give Ian space, although I think that is mostly due to Jodi's influence.  
Two of the new humans walk into the room, they look around. The room is almost cleared out and Jodi waves at them.  
"Come sit with us!" The humans look at us and walks over, they don't sit down though.  
"Please, sit down." Jodi tries again. The girls sit down.  
"So, you didn't get chores yet?" Jodi asks.  
"No, we're supposed to help with lunch later on. We didn't want to stay in that big cave, so decided to come stay here." One of the girls answers.

"I am Jodi and you know Wanda from last night. We're not allowed to do anything at all," Jodi gestures at me and herself "we would like some company, if you want to talk. I'm very curious, there isn't much interesting going on in these caves."  
The girls just shrug. They look very much a like. Not just by their looks, but also by their posture, the way they sit down, the look in their eyes.  
"What are your names? Where did you stay?"  
"I am Zoey and this is my sister Carin." Zoey answers Jodi.  
"As you know, we are from Russels cell. It was located in the woods, we lived in tents. The tents were camouflaged really well and we were also partially underground, not entirely like in these caves. Nick lived in his house near to the woods, so he would warn us whenever Souls would come close. For two times, all of us went to his house and stayed in the attic there."  
"How long have you been staying in the woods?"  
"We've been with Russell from the beginning, he is our uncle. So we have been running for about 7 years now. First we went from place to place, but we settled down in the woods two years ago. That was about the time Nick came to us. Russell didn't think staying in one place was save before that, but since we had Nick, a Soul, to help now, he thought it would work out."  
"Who are the other two with you?"  
"Cindy and Carlos, they are a couple. Carlos came from Nate's group, but decided to come live with us for Cindy."  
"Weren't you scared in the woods?" I think I'd be. The caves are underground, completely covered because of how nature created them, but tents… I don't think I'd like the openness of it.  
Carin shrugs. "Not really. We were used to it. Yes, it was dangerous, but where isn't it dangerous for humans these days?"  
Our little group falls quiet for some time. Then Zoey breaks the silence.

"How far along are you in your pregnancy?"  
Jodi smiles. "I'm just over 7 months." We talk some more about the pregnancy until Trudy and Sharon walk in. The four of us get up and all of us prepare lunch. The room starts filling with people coming for lunch.  
Mel, Jeb and Jared sit down at a table with the three Souls. I don't see Kyle and Ian yet, so I want to walk to Mels table, but Melanie sees me and just shakes her head at me, so I stay at the counter and help serve the food, even though my help is not really needed anymore. Why can't I go sit with them? I want to talk some more to the Souls. They seem to be having a heated conversation though. I try to not be obvious whilst looking at them, but I doubt I'm able to fool anyone. I never was and I don't think I ever will be able to.

"You can't leave without me! You can't leave me behind here!" Sky stands up. Now I don't have to pretend not to be looking anymore, because everyone in the room is looking at her. Burns stands up as well and puts a hand on Sky's arm. She just shakes it off and walks out of the room. Burns and Jared go after her.  
Ian and Kyle walk in with Cindy and Carlos. Of course the first thing Ian does is look for me. I walk over to him, holding two plates, one for both of us. Jodi was already sitting down again with Zoey and Carin, so Kyle walks over to her. Carlos and Cindy get some plates at the counter and go sit with them as well. Ian kisses me on the forehead.  
"Why was Sky running out?"  
"I don't know, let's go ask Mel." We sit down at the table where Nick, Jeb and Mel are.  
"What happened just now?" I look from Mel to Jeb to Nick.  
"We're going to have to go back out, Jared and me." Melanie answers.  
"And Sky wants to come with you?"  
"Well, Burns and Nick have to come with us, they are needed somewhere else. We can't take Sky with us, because we just don't know if we can trust her yet." Nick looks angry at Melanie's comment, but I can understand her. It took all of the humans time to believe I could be trusted. And Nick and Burns had similar experiences with Russell and Nate.  
"When will you be leaving?"  
"Tonight. Burns and Nick were supposed to be at…"Melanie hesitates "Someplace. Yesterday already."  
"Is anyone else joining you?"  
"No, it'll just be the four of us. And Jared and I will be back before morning."

Ian is turning so he can face Nick.  
"Can I ask you some questions?" Nick looks apprehensive, but agrees.  
"Of course, whatever you want to know. If I can answer, I will."  
"Nick is still in there with you." Jeb shifts slightly, I know him well enough to realize he is really paying attention now.  
"Yes."  
"Why?"  
"Why he's in here? I don't know. Some humans…"  
"No, sorry, that's not what I meant." Ian interrupts him. "I meant; why don't you let yourself be extracted?" Nick really looks uncomfortable now, so Ian adds in a soft tone: "I'm not accusing you, I'm just genuinely curious."

"Well, just like you humans don't fully trust us Souls, I didn't know if I could trust the humans truly with information like that. I don't mean Russell or any other humans from my group, but other ones. If Russell knew, and extracted Souls, and then shared the information, bad people could get the information as well. I didn't have the faith to do it.  
Secondly, I realized that if I left, I wouldn't be able to help anymore. It was just me and Burns. And Burns was really relieved when I showed up. It took some of the responsibility and workload of his shoulders. I, as a Soul, am too valuable for the human survivors.  
Third; I just realized the option of taking a new body last night. I hadn't considered it, because it felt like the same. Leaving Nick to give him back his body and then just go to another body, take another human's life? I always thought I'd leave one day, so Nick could get his body back. Nick agrees. One day I, when it was safe enough and the Soul-me wasn't necessary anymore.  
Lastly; Nick _does_ agree. He doesn't want me to leave. There is nothing for him that he would 'need' his own body for. He likes the way we work together. One mind, but still two minds. He feels just as valuable as I do."

"So he has no family?"  
"No, there is no one for him, no family, no love, no ties to the world sort of speak. He doesn't feel it's a big sacrifice to have me stay inside him."  
"But what if we _did_ find a body like Wanda's? A body where there's no one in there, so it could truly be yours, yours alone?"  
"I don't want a new body. After I leave Nick's body I want to be sent off to another planet."  
"That's what Wanda said." Melanie mumbles. I flash a look at her. Does she think Nick is lying like I was? I don't know about that myself. I don't sense that he's lying. But like he said himself; he doesn't have ties here either. I did. I _do_. I have a reason not to want to live without them.  
Now that Nick's finished speaking, I notice that the room has fallen quiet. Everyone was listening to the conversation at our table.  
"Thank you Nick." Ian says "I think we all understand better now." Ian did this on purpose. Not everyone was here, but he knows just as well as I do that stories go fast in these caves. He wanted everyone to know and understand. Ian sees me looking at him and just smiles knowingly at me.

I get up to take the plates to the counter. Everyone will be working for the afternoon again, maybe I can get the dishes done. And if they don't let me there's a good chance I'll be able to get some stuff ready for dinner. Before I can walk out, Ian stops me.  
"Don't leave without kissing me Wanderer." His eyes are so full of love, I feel my heart overflowing. I kiss him and walk to the counter. The kitchen clears out, Trudy walks over to me.  
"Wanda, let me take the dishes." Of course.  
"Okay, but Trudy, can I prepare dinner? I want to bake pizza."  
"For pizza? Yes, you can definitely cook."

The room is actually empty now. I'm alone. That only happens rarely when I'm in our room and even then Ian usually shows up after a few minutes. I just know it won't take long now either, before anyone shows up. I start kneading the dough. I have to fill up four big plates to make enough pizza for everyone in the cave. And even then no one will get to eat their bellies full of it, I'll have to see if we have some lettuce left, or it will have to be bread or soup. When I've filled the second plate up with dough, Jared walks in.  
"Pizza?" He walks over to me and cracks a laugh.  
"What?"  
"You've got some dough on your cheek." Jared lifts up his hand, it hovers for a bit, but then he wipes the dough of my cheek. _Why_ do my cheeks burn now?  
"Thank you." We fall silent, Jared comes back to his positives first.  
"Need some help?"  
"I can manage. I'm sure you have something better to do than kneading dough, Jared."  
"I really don't. Mel and I are free of chores today, because we're going to be out all night."  
"Okay, you take the last batch then."  
"You know," Jared says "it's still strange to see Mel's recipes coming from your hands." I only know this recipe for pizza because Melanie used to make it. It's Jamie's favorite food.

When there's no one else around, the vibe between me and Jared is always different. It's like the air is thicker. Like it's harder to focus on what I want to say. Jared usually lightens the mood up, but this time he seems just as lost in thought as I am. I look aside and catch him looking at me, my breath catches and of course my face turns red again. I look down and a strand of hair falls in my face. Jared takes it and slides it behind my ear. We just stare at each other for a minute or so.  
"So, what are we eating with these pizzas?" Jared breaks the silence. He finished kneading his batch sooner than I am with mine. My smaller hands and weaker muscles slow things down a bit. Him speaking up clears the air. I take a deep breath to steady myself. I know where my heart is, just as I definitely know where Jared's heart lies. It's just a strange, special connection. I know Mel and Ian have it as well. It can be confusing. It is confusing. But all of us know where we stand.  
"I was hoping there is still lettuce in the cooling area. Can you go and look?"  
"Uhm… It'll have to wait, or are you almost done as well, we could go together?"  
"I'll be a while with this last batch. If you just go ahead and look if there is some lettuce, I'll be done by the time you come back."  
"It's okay, I'll wait for you."  
"Jared, it's a ten minute walk. If you just go now, it'll save time." Why is he being so difficult about this?  
"I'll wait."  
"Jared…"  
"I'm not letting you stay here alone, we have strangers in the caves, Wanda."  
It dawns on me now. "That's why you're here. You're on guard duty." Jared doesn't whisk it off or soften it like Jamie or Jeb would. He's like Ian with this. He just owns up.  
"Yes, I am. And I am not leaving." I know that stubborn look on his face too well to even try and protest more. I sigh though, to let him know that I do _not_ agree. All he does is chuckle.


	15. Chapter 15

**Once again: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 15.**

Fortunately everyone liked the pizza. Jamie told me it was the best ever and Mel just winked at me, she knows it's her recipe. After we finish dinner Jeb stands up and asks who's in for a game.  
"The rains will come soon, we don't know when we'll be able to play again when they come, since the game cave will be packed with all of our belongings then."  
Everyone is excited and we head off to the recreation cave. The new humans and Souls look a bit lost. I walk over to the Souls and explain.  
"We play soccer regularly. Usually everyone participates, we just divide everyone in two teams. If you don't feel comfortable playing, I'll just sit down and watch with you."  
"I'd love to play!" Burns says and Nick agrees. Sky seems to be hesitant.  
"Don't you want to play? We can just sit over there." Sky shrugs.  
"No, that's fine, I'll play."  
"Wanda! You're in my team!" Jamie calls me, so I walk over to them and do a bit of stretching. I'm still not as fast and strong as I'd like to be, but I have improved a bit because of the training I've been doing. At the very least I'm a bit quicker.

Or not. After two goals – I don't even know which team scored – I know that I have to quit. It's either that or stay with my team and stand still. I'd rather stop altogether then. Ian walks up to me, but I wave him off. He shouldn't stop because of me. He understands my wave, smiles, blows me a kiss and stays in the field. My team won't miss me, that's for sure. Snacks for everyone would be nice. When I look at Jodi I see her patting at the ground next to her. I mime that I'll be right back.  
I take my time walking through the passages. I'm still trying to catch my breath and they will be playing for a while, there's no rush for the snacks. When I get to the storage caves, I look for the caramel chocolate bars I brought from our last raid, there should be two boxes… There! I lift them, but they are more heavy then I thought. I'm determined to get these chocolate bars to the rest though, so I'll just see this as a physical exercise. Then I hear footsteps. I'm assuming it's one of the guys.

"Good, you can help me carry these."  
"I'm sorry?"  
"Oh! Sky! I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting you."  
"Were you expecting someone then?" Sky looks over her shoulder.  
"No, I wasn't expecting anyone really. I just assumed you were one of the guys. Normally when someone approaches me, it's one of them." Sky relaxes.  
"Really? And why is that?"  
"Overprotectiveness." I smile at her and hand her a box. "I was here to get some snacks for everyone. Carry this one, please?" She takes the box and we walk back towards the recreation cave. Sky is walking slow.  
"Wanderer? I have some questions, some things bothering me, but I think they might be personal. Do you mind if I ask you some things?" Wanderer? I introduced myself as Wanda to the newcomers. How does she know my name is Wanderer? I shake the uneasiness of and just assume someone in the caves told her. Besides, it's not a secret.  
"Of course, just ask, I'll see what I can answer."  
"Why? Why do you side with the humans? Why did you give them our most valuable information? Why would you let yourself be taken from your Host?"  
"Well… The Host I was in, Melanies body, she has a very deep love. Love for Jamie, her brother, and Jared, her boyfriend. That love came through in her body. It touched me. And it made me love them as well, because of the love the body felt."  
"So you let the Host influence you?" I can hear the faintest hint of her thinking I'm weak from her voice.  
"Yes and no. The persons she loved, I loved them as well because of the body. But I think I'd still have become sympathetic of the humans either way. All of the emotions of this species are overwhelming. Maybe if I didn't have a resistant Host, I wouldn't have considered it. But then I wouldn't have _known_. And when I did know, this was the only path for me to choose."  
"And showing them how to extract us?"  
"Firstly, it saved the Seeker, and her Host. The only other option for the humans was that they would've killed the Seeker, which meant killing the Host as well. I couldn't bare the thought of such a loss, for both of our species. But secondly, I knew I had to give Melanie her life back. She didn't want me to do it, she was fine with working with me, but she was in love with Jared and I was in love with Ian. Apart from the fact that _she_ didn't like it, the body was torn as well, it wouldn't let me love two men at the same time."  
Sky breaths out loudly. "You were in love with that man? And he was in love with you? You, the Soul? I assumed his love was for your Host, the Host you are using now."  
"No, Ian fell in love with me. And I love him."  
We just walk in silence for a while, I can see Sky is lost in thought.

"Can I ask you something as well?" I ask Sky.  
"Of course."  
"Why did you help Burns and Nick? You said you don't know yet if you are on the human's side. But then why not let Burns and Nick be taken?"  
"We were surrounding Burns and Nick and the humans. And I heard them trying to save the humans. I realized they would be taken. I didn't want that. I didn't feel for the humans at that moment. I felt for the Souls. I was shocked at what I heard them say, how they stood up for those humans, but I didn't want them to get hurt. So I took them away from there."  
"What about now? How do you think about these things now?"  
"I'm still glad I saved Burns and Nick, but I still don't know what to think about the humans. They seem so… hostile to me. Apparently they don't like Souls, why should I stand on their side when they act like that towards me?"  
"That's not because you're a Soul, Sky." She looks at me, confused.  
"What do you mean?"  
"I've been here for quite a long time. The people here know me and love me, as I love them. The first evening you were here, you came at me quite strongly. The humans are mad because of it. They stick up for each other, and I am one of them."  
"You truly are one of them." Sky looks puzzled and lost in thought. We reach the recreation cave again and we step inside.

Kyle sees me as soon as I walk into the cave. He's with Jodi and I can see they both look relieved. Kyle walks out of the cave and I walk over to Jodi. The game hasn't stopped, but I immediately spot some persons missing. Ian, Jared, Jamie and Mel are gone. Before I get the chance to wonder where they are, I see Ian walking back in with Kyle. Ian shoots a look at Sky and then walks over to me. Kyle notices the boxes at my feet and comes at me as well.  
"Hey, everyone, caramel chocolate bars!" Kyle shouts. Ian takes me in his arms and whispers in my ear.  
"You shouldn't leave like that on your own, we were worried."  
"Nothing to be worried about, my love." I look him in the eyes.  
"You don't know that, we have guests. Promise me you won't go wander of on your own anymore."  
I smile at his use of my name as a verb. "It's who I am."  
Ian smiles back at me but also replies: "That's not a promise, Wanderer."  
I laugh and kiss him. "If it makes you feel better, I promise."  
Jared, Jamie and Melanie walk in as well and I can feel Jared's eyes doing a check-up over me. I smile at them and that seems to satisfy Jared. He takes some caramel bars from Kyle and they all come to sit with us.

Doc also walks over to us and starts talking to Jared.  
"I know you're leaving tonight, I didn't think you'd be gone that soon again. Had I known, I would've addressed this earlier. But, the last and only time we got Soul medicine was for Jamie. We could use some more, or we will run out of them. I mean, we haven't had real bad incidents yet, but I've used it for burns, cuts and headaches, stuff like that. It just made life for everyone easier."  
I turn around and look at Doc and Jared.  
"I'll just have to join Jared and Melanie on this trip then, so we can get some."  
"No!" Ian heard as well and takes my hand. "You are not going in a hospital for medicine. You will not hurt yourself anymore."  
"It will be healed within minutes Ian, and it will benefit everyone."  
"Oh, come on! There is no need for Wanda to hurt herself, Ian." Jared is annoyed. "You're overreacting as usual. We know what medicine we need. Wanda can just go in, pretend that she has a body with really bad head aches or severe belly cramps. Then get the Soul to leave her for a minute and steal the medicine we need."  
Wow. Why didn't I think of that? That's really a good plan. Ian relaxes a bit more.  
"That is a good idea, Jared, but I can't do that at night. I'll have to wait for daytime then."  
Jared dismisses the subject. "We can talk about all of this later, you can't come with us on this trip. We need to get Burns and Nick out and we can't have anyone knowing where we're taking them."  
"So blindfold me." I still feel that slight ping of hurt inside. I know it's not personal, but it's there nonetheless.  
"No, we'll just have to make another trip when Mel and I get back."  
"Jared, you know we shouldn't. Our last raid was very thorough. We got enough to last for months. And that was with reason. When the rain comes, we can't go out anymore. The sand will be mud, so we can't cover our tracks anymore. We need to take advantage of this now."  
"We'll just either have to take the risk or wait the rains out before we get more."  
"But what if someone _does_ get seriously hurt during the rains?"  
"Then we'll figure it out then."  
Ian tries to take over. "Just let Wanda and me come."  
"O'shea, like I said, we can't have anyone know where we're taking Burns and Nick."  
"Would you let me finish, Howe? Take us out with you and bring us to a hotel. Wanda will get us a room and we'll wait until daytime. When we are there, you and Mel can take Burns and Nick away. We get the medicine in the morning, you come pick us up and we'll all head back. That way you don't have to go out for two trips and we won't know where Burns and Nick are going."  
Jared grinds his teeth. "If you have anything you want to take with you, you'd better hurry. We're leaving in an hour."


	16. Chapter 16

**Once again: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 16.**

Ian and I just change into clean clothes, we don't need anything else for a raid. Especially not if it's just going to be one day out. When we get outside, Jared is already there with the jeep.  
"You ran and got it? There is no need to do that, I can make the run."  
"I know you can, but they can't." He points at Nick and Burns in the backseat. They are both blindfolded.  
"Oh, yes, of course."  
Mel and Jared take the front seats, Ian slides in the back next to Burns and pulls me at his lap.  
"I know it won't be as comfortable, but there's no more room." I let out a small laugh.  
"I think I'll be more than comfortable, Ian."  
"Everyone ready to go?" Jared starts the jeep and we take off. I wiggle around on Ian's lap a bit, I don't want to put too much weight on him. He moves his mouth to my ear.  
"If you keep doing that, my little Wanderer, I'm going to have a problem here. We are in a car full of people." My eyes widen as I look him in the eyes. I try to sit as still as possible, but Ian positions me in a way that's comfortable for the both of us.  
"Get some rest, sweetheart." It's past midnight, I definitely am not used to staying up this late, I need a good nights sleep to have enough energy. I can't be looking tired in the hospital tomorrow so I just put my head on Ian's shoulder and close my eyes.  
"How long will the drive be Jared?" Ian asks.  
"We're taking you two hours out. It's another hospital than the last time, off course. Even though Wanda is in another body now, I don't want to risk going to the same one again."  
"Will Burns and Nick be returning to us again?"  
"I don't think so. We need to get some things ready." Burns answers Ian.  
"Burns…" Nick warns him.  
"I know, I'm not giving anything away."  
"I'm so sorry about having to blindfold you guys," Melanie says "As soon as it's safe enough and we're far enough from the caves, we'll take them off."  
"It's okay, we understand." Of course they do. It's the last thing I hear before I drift off into sleep.

"Wanderer, sweetheart, wake up." Ian's soft voice wakes me.  
"You need to get us a room." I try so sit up, but realize I'm on Ian's lap, there isn't much room to move. I yawn.  
"What time is it?"  
"It's about three in the morning. Do you think you'll manage on your own?"  
"Of course, I'll go get a room."  
"Okay, I'll wait here for you."  
"Ian, there are three bags in the trunk, take those out. Wanda can use them for medicine and it will give you 'luggage' for being here."  
"Thanks Jared."

I take off to the reception. The receptionist looks surprised at seeing me.  
"Good evening, can I help you?"  
"Hello, my name is Rises to the Sun, I would like a room for two."  
"You're out late." The Soul smiles at me.  
"Yes, my partner and I thought we could keep on driving, but he fell asleep a while ago. When I felt my eyes falling, I realized it was better to go get a room. Of course I know it's dark out, but I hadn't noticed that it's this late already."  
"Yes, you do look tired. Well, I'm glad you stopped here then, and didn't get into an accident."  
"As am I." The receptionist hands me the key to the room. "Thank you."  
"We serve breakfast from 8 tot 10, if you would like some in the morning."  
"I think we will, thank you." I try to hide a yawn behind my hands and smile. "Good night."  
I walk outside and go get Ian from the car. He takes the bags and says goodbye to Jared and Melanie. Burns and Nick no longer have blindfolds on, so I look at them.  
"Good luck and stay safe."  
"I'm sure we'll see each other again, Wanda, maybe sooner than you think." Jared and Nick don't look happy at that comment. Melanie has opened her door and leans out of her seat to hug me.  
"You stay safe as well, I expect to see you here in the morning."  
"Of course we'll be here. Jared just told Ian we'll be here somewhere between 7 or 8. Just keep checking the parking lot from your room to see if the jeep's here." I let go of Melanie and Ian and I walk to our room. As soon as we get in to the room, Ian just lays down, without even bothering to take his clothes off.

"You should get undressed Ian."  
"Why, you got plans?" He wiggles his eyebrows at me. It looks so funny that I just burst out into laughter.  
"No," His face instantly drops to disappointment. "But you shouldn't get those clothes even more wrinkled than they already are from the long drive. We're going outside tomorrow, during daytime. People will notice."  
Ian sighs. "You're right, I'm just so tired."  
"Really? I don't feel that tired at all."  
"You slept in the car, of course you're not tired anymore."  
"Too bad that you are…" I take off my clothes and get into the bed. Ian's voice is husky when he talks again.  
"I don't think I'm _that_ tired though…" He quickly undresses and lies down next to me, taking my face in his hands and kissing me.

"Are they here yet?" Ian's standing at the window, looking through the curtains. It's 9 in the morning and I'm starting to grow worried.  
"No, still no sight of them."  
"Well, I'll get us both breakfast then. If I don't it'll draw suspicion." I walk out of the room and go to the buffet. The Soul behind it smiles at me.  
"Good morning to you, Miss." I smile back.  
"Good morning." I take two plates and start filling them. Before the Soul can ask me anything, I explain: "My partner is taking a shower, I offered to get us both breakfast, so that we can eat in our room." After Ian and I finish breakfast, I take the plates back to the breakfast area. When I get back in the room I look outside myself.  
"We can't stay that much longer, they will notice."  
"I know, but they will also notice if we just walk off, holding those bags."  
I sigh and look out of the window again.  
"They're okay Wanda, they're just running late, nothing happened." Ian wraps his arms around me.  
"You don't know that."  
"I know Jared. Nothing happened. Trust me."  
"It's 11 now and they were supposed to be here 3 hours ago." I sigh again. "We just can't wait any longer though. I'll return the key and we'll just have to walk to the hospital. Maybe they'll show up after I get the medicine."

I walk into the hospital. Ian wasn't happy with me going alone, but a store is something different than a hospital. Humans can come into a store with me, but in here, with the waiting area and all, it's crowded in a different way and not a good idea. So he's reluctantly waiting outside for me. I walk up to the counter as I did yesterday.  
"Hello, my name is Rises to the Sun, is it possible that I could see a Healer?"  
"Of course, dear, what's wrong with you?"  
"I've been having terrible head aches. My partner and I are passing through and I thought I could wait until we got home, but I think it has to do with the sun."  
"Just sit down for a minute, a Healer will come for you."  
"Thank you."

After a few minutes, a Healer walks up to me. "Rises to the Sun? Hello, I'm Healer Rose, will you walk with me?" She takes me to an exam room. "Well, Rises to the Sun, what is the problem?"  
"I'm travelling with my partner and I'm experiencing quite the head aches. I didn't have them in the area where we come from, but we didn't have as much sun there. I started getting the head aches since we came into sunny territory. I think this Host doesn't respond well to the sun."  
"Well, I can give you some medicine for the pain. But I think staying out of the sun as much as possible is the smart thing to do for you Rises to the Sun. From your name I take it you love the sun, but the human bodies can't stand sunlight for that long."  
I laugh sheepishly at her. "I do think your right, Healer Rose, I didn't think of that."  
"It can be hard, getting adjusted to these Hosts, I know it took me some time." She hands me some No Pain and I take it. "How does that feel?"  
"Oh, I feel better already." I have to think of a way to get her to leave. Just ask for water? No, there's a faucet here in the room, that won't make her leave. What else? I get up on my feet and walk towards the table. I feign interest.

"I've never been to a Healing Facility before. All of this looks interesting." Healer Rose looks at me and smiles.  
"Yes, I do think it is interesting." She replies at me. I look at the medicine on the table and then I see it; Sleep. I can't think of a good reason to get the Healer leave the room. I take the sleep, turn around and spray it in her face. She slumps down on the floor and I feel bad about that. I consider trying to lift her onto the bed, but doubt I'm that strong. Besides, I need to hurry up. I get as much medicine as I can into my bag. I don't even care that I'm emptying all the compartments. Since I used Sleep on her, she'll already know that something's wrong either way. After I've filled the bags I walk out of the room. I try to walk slowly, but I really want to hurry.  
The Soul that helped me when I first came in looks up at me. "Could Healer Rose help you?"  
"Oh yes, I feel much better." I don't stop to answer, but just walk out. Outside, I want to walk to where Ian's waiting, but the jeep pulls up beside me.

Jared smiles at me. "Need a ride?"


	17. Chapter 17

**Wow, chapter 17 already. I had no idea I'd be loving it this much, writing fanfic! I literally type out a chapter and then post it. I have no idea where the story's going to go. So please keep reviewing, it gives me ideas as well :-)**

**And as always: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 17.**

"Can you get in? We are kind of in a hurry." I was just standing here on the parking lot, staring at Jared. I shake it off.  
"Sorry, let's go." As I get in, I notice Mel lying in the back, she seems to be asleep. Ian's holding her.  
"Wanda, did you get everything?" Ian leans forward and I hand him the bags. When he leans in, I can see he has blood on his hand. In alarm, I turn myself around entirely.  
"What happened, why do you have blood on you?"  
"Turn back around Wanda, people can see you." Jared tells me gentle, but firmly. I listen to him and turn around again. I want to look at Ian, to know what's wrong, but I understand that if I act out of the ordinary, I'll put us in danger.

"What happened?"  
"Seekers." Jared answers me.  
"It's not my blood, it's Mel's." Ian says at the same time. No! My sister! I look at Jared.  
"She'll be fine once Ian uses the medicine. It's a good thing you just got them."  
Ian's treating Mel's wounds. "Tell us what happened Jared."  
"When we got to the place we were supposed to bring Nick and Burns to, there were Seekers. They must have gotten the location from one of the humans who got caught. We didn't notice them in time. When we did, we tried to turn around and leave, but they blocked the street. We couldn't get out of there with the car, so we had to get out and run."  
"Wait, you weren't in the jeep?"  
"No, we had another car. We have two of them – well, one left now – at another safe place. We didn't want to use the jeep because it is too easy to recognize and follow. As I said, we couldn't drive off anymore, so we got out of that car and made a run for it. The Seekers didn't seem shocked or surprised at all that there were two Souls with us. They seemed to be expecting it. But they didn't want to harm the Souls, which was our luck. Burns and Nick positioned themselves in front of us and then we ran off. Most of then couldn't keep up with us, the Souls weren't as fast as us. Well, we are used to running, I guess they aren't." Jared smiles a bit.

"Three of them did keep up though. I told Burns to keep Melanie out of the way and Nick and I tried to fight them off. Unfortunately, two of them came at me at once and Mel tried to get away from Burns to help me. Burns wouldn't have it and because he tried to keep her back, she stumbled. The Seeker got hold of her arm and yanked her towards him. Mel pulled herself loose, which made the Seeker lose balance, but she lost balance herself as well. They both fell down and then she hurt her knee. Mel got up and wanted to run off, but the Seeker grabbed her by her ankle. Mel got thrown back down to the ground and fell on her head. She lost consciousness right away. Burns took her and we managed to escape."  
"Are you hurt, Jared? Where are Burns and Nick now?" Jared's face nudges down a bit, but then he looks straight up again. I can't see his eyes, because of the sunglasses he's wearing, but I follow the line his face went. His lower leg is bleeding.  
"Ian, I need some medicine here. Now." I stretch my hand out to the backseat.  
"Wanda, it can wait until I can stop, you can't just hang over me and treat my leg while I'm driving."  
"Then pull over."  
"We can't pull over here, it's too crowded."  
I give in. "Okay, fine. Tell me what happened next."

"As I said, Burns took Mel and we ran off. When we were sure we weren't followed anymore, we got the jeep and I took Burns and Nick to another location. I didn't know the location before, for safety reasons, but Nick showed me the way. He assured me they won't use the location anymore."  
"Did one of them get hurt?"  
"No, they are both fine, not even a scratch."  
"What happened to your leg?"  
"I ran into an iron fence. Burns was holding Mel and I was… Kind off… Arguing with him… Saying I wanted to hold Mel. I wasn't paying as much attention as I should have and fell over the fence. It had a very sharp edge and made a large cut. Burns even joked about it, saying that it was fate telling me that he should carry Mel." Jared smiles at the memory, Ian chuckles as well, but I can't see the humor in it. Jared must have been really distraught then, I've never known him to lose focus or make mistakes in the outside world.

"How's Melanie doing, Ian?"  
"She's fine, I healed her entirely."  
"I _do_ feel great."  
"Mel." It's nothing more than a whisper coming from Jared. Even with the sunglasses on, I can see the relief washing over his face.  
Mel sits up, but Ian tries to keep her down.  
"Easy there Mel, I know you feel great now, but that's the medicine. You hurt your head, we don't know if you're entirely okay."  
"Hey sweetie, glad to have you back." Jared doesn't even turn slightly to be able to see Mel, but smiles broadly. The tension leaves his body and he relaxes. Now, for the first time since I got in the jeep, his face actually shows he's in pain.  
"Jared, pull over."  
"I'm fine."  
"Pull over, Jared."

Jared drives to a parking lot and stops at the end of it. We are a bit hidden by trees, no one will notice us right away. I still don't take the risk of healing him right here and now though. I just get out of the jeep and walk to the driver's seat. Jared slides over the middle, so he doesn't have to get out. I start the car and Ian hands Jared the medicine.  
"Oh, that's better, thank you Wanda."  
I drive the rest of the way. During our drive, the sky is getting darker. Not because it's late, but because the rain will be coming, the clouds are fastly approaching. I take the jeep all the way up to the caves.  
"Okay, take Melanie and the medicine to Doc."  
"Aren't you coming?"  
"I'd rather park the jeep now. The rain is coming. When the rain starts, we can't drive the car back to the hiding spot. Not only will the tires leave trails, we will also leave footprints."  
Jared begins to disagree but I cut him off.  
"You know I'm right. You and Mel need to get yourselves checked out by Doc. And Ian will be with me."  
"Come on, let's be quick about this." Melanie looks at Jared. "You are usually the one who is fastest to see how things need to be done and how to get it done best. Wanda is right, this is the best solution. The jeep needs to be safely parked. Even though I hate to admit it, we _are _both injured and need to see Doc and rest. Wanda won't be alone." Jared gives in and gets out of the jeep. He takes Mel's hand, but when she gets up, she has to steady herself on Jared's arm.  
"I'm dizzy." So Jared lifts her up and carries her inside. They don't even look back.

"Do you need me to drive?" Ian asks me.  
"Not really, but if you want to, you can." I know he wants to, so I slide over to the passenger seat and Ian takes the wheel. He grabs my hand and we just drive in silence. Ian parks the jeep and we get out and start the walk back to the caves. Just when we reach the platform, the rain starts. Ian starts to run and pulls me with him, but I pull him back.  
"Let's stay out here for a while."  
The rain is not cold. It's so warm outside, that the rain doesn't even cool me down a bit. I pull Ian's face to mine and kiss him deeply.  
"I'm so glad nothing worse happened today." I tell Ian.  
"So am I, I was nervous about you going into that hospital, but when Jared pulled up with Melanie wounded like that…" It's still strange for him. Melanie is so much tougher than I ever was or will be. It's not just the body, it's the personality. And before I left her body, Ian never knew that body anyway other than someone who needed protection. Who was afraid of violence. And who needed care after that. Seeing Mel wounded like that must have touched a memory.

We stay close to each other, kissing, holding each other. Fifteen minutes later Ian pulls back.  
"We have to get in."  
"I like it out here better." I reply, making Ian laugh.  
"We can't stay out here longer. They know we're supposed to be back, Mel and Jared are here already remember? If we stay out any longer, they will worry about us. Besides, it _is_ raining. Meaning; our room is wet right now. And probably, so are our belongings and bedding."  
I grimace. I hadn't thought about that yet.  
When we walk into the caves, Jodi and Kyle are standing there, Kyle's holding two towels. He hands both of us one.  
"Thanks Kyle."  
"No problem bro."  
As we all walk into the cave, Jodi starts talking.  
"It was very convenient that Melanie and Jared came through. They told us the rains were coming, so no one has their stuff or bedding wet, everyone got to the recreation cave in time."  
"Except for ours, I guess then." Ian laughs.  
"Well, no, of course not, Ian. Did you think we would let your stuff get wet? Because Melanie and Jared went to Doc, Jamie got their stuff. Kyle and I went to your room and got everything. Well, Kyle got everything out, he wouldn't let me carry anything, of course." Jodi lovingly pats her belly.  
"That's nice of you both, thank you for that." I stop to hug Jodi. We continue our way, now I'm walking with Jodi, Kyle and Ian are behind us.  
We walk into the recreation cave, everybody's in here now. There's always that feeling of excitement when the rain first comes, you can just feel it in the air. After a few weeks, of course, that feeling fades, everyone's desire for privacy shows up again. I look around to see where our mattresses are. Jodi steers me towards a corner of the cave. I can see that they put our mattresses next to Jodi's and Kyle's. I look at Ian to see his response to this. He smiles and turns to Kyle.

"Thanks for moving our stuff in here."  
We all sit down on our mattresses.  
"So, Jodi, how are you feeling?"  
"Heavy." We all laugh to that, the conversation is light and relaxed.


	18. Chapter 18

**Once again: Of course I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 18.**

Ian doesn't mind at all that we are next to Kyle and Jodi. In the mornings, when all of us are woken up by Jeb – he likes an early start, so everyone has to get up early – we even all chat for a while. It's still strange just waking up and having the entire population present.  
It's been two weeks since the newcomers came. Zoey, Carin, Cindy and Carlos have adjusted well to the live in the caves. They've been welcomed by everyone. Of course people are also worrying where to put them, but everyone agrees that they'd rather be crammed up in the caves than sent people away. Humans are too rare and valuable.  
Sky hasn't been adjusting though. She's sleeping at one of the outer corners of the cave. I heard her discussing with Jeb, she didn't want to sleep in the recreation cave at all. She said she wasn't comfortable here. Jeb told her she had to, because people still didn't know whether they could trust her or not. She argued that that was more reason not to sleep with all of us. He ended the discussion, saying she had to stay in sight at all times. Whenever she gets the opportunity, she asks questions. About where we are, about how we got here, about the other humans, about the Souls on our side. It's making Jared suspicious of her.

I'm in the kitchen kneading dough for bread when Jared and Jeb come to see me.  
"Have you got a moment?" Jared asks, as he points out to a table. I clean my hands and sit with them. Jeb looks around before he talks.  
"We want to take Sky out."  
"What? Why?"  
"She's been asking questions. We can't trust her. We need to send her off."  
"We can't go out in the rains, we can't send her to another planet right now."  
"I know that Wanda, but we can keep her in the tank until we can go back out again."  
"She helped us, I don't see why you should do this."  
"It's no different from when we took Candy."  
"We didn't know Candy, Jared!"  
"No, but we do know Sky. And I think all three of us – and more people with us – agree that she can't be trusted."  
"Are you going to tell her?" I ask.  
"I don't think that would be wise. I'm almost certain she won't agree. We plan on taking her at night, when she's already asleep. Not only will she not see it coming, but it also won't alarm anyone." I don't like this at all. Sneaking around, it's not like me.

"Why are you telling me?" They already decided they are going to do this, I don't see why they come talking to me about it. It's not like they want advice or something.  
"Wanda, you are one of us, but you are also a Soul. We don't want to do this behind your back. We want you to know, before we do anything, so that you'll know what's going on." I look Jared in the eyes first, then Jeb. I appreciate their honesty about it.  
"When do you want to do it?"  
"Tonight, we already asked Doc to be ready."  
"Okay, will you wake me up, so I can be there?"  
"Are you sure?"  
"Yes, I'd like to be there."

"Wanda, wake up." Jared whispers in my ear. I turn around to see his face right next to mine.  
"I'm coming." I wiggle myself out of Ian's arm and get up quietly. Ian doesn't wake up, I know he won't wake up anytime soon. Just before we went to sleep I told him about the plan. He agreed that Sky should be taken out. He told me to wake him up, but looking at him now, I decide not to. He looks so peaceful asleep. Besides, Jared and Jeb said they didn't want anyone else with us.  
Jared already went to the other side of the room. I can see two figures at the entrance of the cave, that must be Jeb and Doc. I hear a muffled 'hmpf' and then I see Jared standing up, holding Sky. He's walking out of the room, Jeb and Doc follow and I come as well.  
In the hospital I can see that Doc has put up canvas at the ceiling. Doc sees me looking at it and explains: "I put it up for Jodi already, if she goes into labor, she will want and need privacy, she can come here. Of course, it's convenient for now as well."

Jared lays Sky down on one of the field beds and steps back. Doc has already prepared everything; the medicine, scalpel and tank are on a side-table next to the bed.  
Jared and Jeb step back and Doc and I step in.  
"Do you need help, Doc?"  
"Yes, please, Wanda."  
Before Doc starts the procedure, he checks if Sky is still unconscious. Jared takes medicine out of his pocket. Sleep. He already used it on Sky in the recreation cave. Of course, it's much better and easier than using chloroform.  
"Ready, Wanda?" Doc asks me.  
"Yes, let's do it."  
Doc makes the cut and gently extracts the Soul.  
"I don't think I will ever get used to how beautiful the Souls are." Jared. I don't answer him, but hold out the tank to Doc. He slides Sky in and turns around to the body. After closing the wound, he turns the girl around, so that she's on her back.  
"Now there's nothing left to do but wait."  
Jeb and Jared sit down on one of the other beds, while Doc puts the tank away.  
I sit with the girl and start talking to her.  
"Sky? Well, your name is not Sky anymore, but maybe you recognize the name anyway. We would like to welcome another human with us. Can you wake up? Are you feeling well?"

I keep talking to her and holding her hand. I don't know for how long I've been sitting there, but Jeb and Doc are lying down by now. Jared doesn't let the tiredness get to him and stays awake with me. My voice becomes a murmur. Jared sits down on the other end of the girl and takes her hand. He takes over from me. I don't move, but I keep quiet and listen to Jared talking.

"You are safe here. You won't be harmed or taken again. Please wake up. Let us know you are here." The girl doesn't respond.  
The room is becoming brighter and brighter. The rain is still falling, but I can tell it's no longer night. I've been up almost the entire night and the weariness is getting the better of me now. I can feel that I'm slowly sinking into sleep. I'm being lifted but even in this body, those hands and arms feel too familiar. Jared takes my hand away from the girls hand and puts me down on the bed.  
"Thanks…" I mumble to him and I drift away.

I wake up to a sigh. "Do you have to do everything yourself, Wanderer?" Ian.  
I am not ready to wake up, so I don't even reply to him, maybe he'll think I'm still asleep.  
"Explain Howe." Jared is still awake, of course he is. While Jared starts to talk, I can feel the bed moving as Ian's weight gets on it. He pulls my head into his lap, I don't bother to listen to Jared and just make myself comfortable with Ian.

"Come on, can you open your eyes? Can you talk to us? We are curious, we really would like to meet you." Ian's talking to the girl now. When I open my eyes I see Ian sitting next to her. Jared must've left, because I don't see him anywhere. Jeb isn't here anymore either. Doc is sitting at his desk, looking at Ian. For the rest of the day, Ian and I take turns talking to the girl. Mel, Jared and Jeb come checking up on us a few times. They bring us food as well.

When the evening comes, Ian wants to go have dinner in the kitchen with the rest of the people. I refuse to go with him, I want to stay with the girl. Ian almost looks mad.  
"You don't have to do this, Wanda, it's not your responsibility."  
I disagree with him. It's my race that did this to this girl. I need to be here to help her wake up and return. I know better than to say that to Ian though. So I just look at him. It's like staring each other down. Ian grumbles, frustrated at me and stalks out of the hospital. In under 15 minutes he returns with two hot plates full of food. We share another look, his is full of understanding, mine is full of love. He understands, as always.

For three days we stay with the girl. She's not responding. We give her fluids, but her body is weakening. She's not coming back. I don't want to admit it, I feel defeated. How many humans are like this by now? Even if we could manage to take more Souls out, how many people are just gone? Is there hope? This is the third time in the caves that a human doesn't return. The odds don't seem to be on the human's side.

On the third night I speak up.  
"We need to get Sky back in."  
"No! We can't trust her."  
"I know that Jared, but if we don't the body will die. This girl, this human, will die. Do you want that?"  
"No, but putting Sky back in is not an option."  
"You'd rather let this girl die?"

Jeb takes the lead.  
"We're putting Sky back in." Jared starts to protest, but Jeb just keeps on talking like he isn't being interrupted. "We'll just put an extra eye on Sky. There isn't another option. We can't let this body die. We'll manage. Sky doesn't know the way out and she doesn't know where she is."  
"Jeb, have you thought about what will happen when Sky wakes up? She'll know we took her out and be mad. We don't trust her, but she doesn't trust us either. If we put her back and she wakes up, she'll be convinced she has even more reason not to trust us."  
"That's not how it works Jared. She was asleep when we took her. The body hasn't woken up. If we put Sky back in, the last memory she will have will be that she fell asleep in the recreation cave." I try to assure him.  
"She'll notice that the body is weaker."  
"Probably, but if we put her back in, take her to the recreation cave and take her back to the spot where she was, she'll be confused a bit, but she won't automatically know what we did."  
"Are you sure about that, Wanda?" Ian asks me.  
"I'm assuming it'll be the same as when Mel left me. She left for a few days and when she came back, she had no memory at all from the time she was gone. It's a chance we just have to take. We can't let this body die."  
"Okay," Jeb says "Put her back in Doc."


	19. Chapter 19

**Obviously: I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 19.**

After Doc put Sky in, Jared took her back to the recreation cave. Our little group went to sleep as well. When I wake, Sky is still asleep. I decide to go and wake her up. We need to get her back into the normal rhythm.  
"Sky, wake up." I can see Ian lingering on the other side of the room, watching me. Jared's making his and Mel's bed, he never does that. I put my hand lightly on Sky's shoulder.  
"Sky, it's morning, wake up." Sky moves slightly and opens her eyes.  
"Good morning, Wanda." She gets up, but doesn't sit up straight, she leans on her underarms and looks exhausted.  
"I think I might be sick, I'm not feeling that well."  
"What do you mean, Sky?" I ask her.  
"I'm light headed. But I am hungry."  
"Would you like me to take you to Doc?"  
"No!" She stops herself. "I'm sorry, no thank you, I don't think I need a Healer." She must still be afraid of Doc, I can understand that.  
"Okay, I will bring you some breakfast, you just stay here." I smile at her and walk away. As soon as I'm out of the cave, Jared comes walking beside me.  
"Did she suspect anything?"  
"No, she thinks she's sick, so I said I'd bring her breakfast." Jared nods and walks off to whatever chore he has for today.

When I get into the kitchen I see that Jodi's behind the counter.  
"Hey Jodi, breakfast for two please."  
"For two?" She looks past me and sees Ian walking in. "Oh, I see, you're getting for Ian as well."  
"No, I'm getting for Sky. She's feeling light headed." Jodi doesn't ask, she knows what we did, everybody knows. And even though we know that is really hard to keep a secret for someone here, Jeb still told everybody not to deliberately tell Sky. I take the plates from Jodi, she winces.  
"Are you okay, Jodi?"  
"Yeah, this baby can just. Kick. Hard." She smiles at me and I turn around and walk out of the kitchen. Ian stops me as I walk past him. He kisses me on the forehead and says: "Jared and I will be nearby if you need any of us." He and Jared are worried Sky will find out what we did and that she'll get mad. I know I can't convince him that it's not necessary to keep watch. Another Soul won't hurt me.

"Feeling better now?" Sky and I ate breakfast in the recreation cave.  
"A bit, thank you, I don't know what's wrong. I'm still hungry though."  
"You could get another plate, if you want."  
"I don't think so, thank you, the humans won't like me taking their food." I can't argue with her reasoning there, I used to think the same way, so I don't push it.  
"I'll go see what chore there is for me today."  
"There won't be. You were on kitchen duty, but I told them you aren't feeling well."  
"But I have to help!"  
"Sky, everyone has a sick day now and then. You get a free day today, you were up for a free day in two days anyway, you're just getting your free day in advance." I smile at her with a – I hope – reassuring expression on my face. She agrees and lies down again.  
"I wonder how I could feel so fine last night and woke up feeling so ill."  
"It's what human bodies do." I pat her on her arm and take off to the kitchen with the plates.

When I walk into the passage I see Jared standing there.  
"Are you on Sky watch?" I ask him.  
"Actually, Jeb is right now, I thought the two of us could do some training. It's been a while." We used to train in the recreation cave, but with everyone sleeping here now, I didn't get the chance anymore. I don't want to do it with everyone present.  
"We can go to one of the field caves. We can't sow in for a while, so those caves aren't used right now."

I'm panting and sweating. But no one would notice the sweat anyway. It's wet in here. The rain doesn't pour down like outside, but there's still enough of it falling down that I was soaked within minutes. First we ran a few rounds through the cave together. I was out of breath before we even finished half a round. On willpower and with Jared's encouragement I managed to get three rounds in. Right now I'm standing across Jared.  
"Really, Wanda, just kick."  
"I don't like violence, you know that. I don't need to know how to fight. Like Ian pointed out, I wouldn't be able to fight even if it would save my life."  
"It's not about fighting or learning how to fight. It's about getting your strength up. We don't really have many ways of training your leg muscles. If you just kick me, then I'll block it. Put as much strength in to it as you can, it will make your legs stronger." He seems a bit too sure that I won't be able to hurt him. Off course I can't – I know that – but being told that I can't cause any damage at all; it's not like he's giving me a compliment.  
So I kick. I put all my strength into it and I try to kick. And miserably fail. Jared blocks my leg and sees I'm about to fall, so he tries to steady me by holding my leg. It's no use, I fall face first. That hurts. As I want to get back up, Jared is already sitting beside me.  
"You're bleeding." Yes, I can feel some blood on my cheek.  
"Let's get you to Doc." No, let's not get me to Doc.  
"Is it bad?" I ask Jared.  
"It seems to be a small wound, you've got some gravel in it though." Jared touches my cheek.  
"Come on," He stands up and stretches his hand out to me. "I'm taking you to Doc."  
"What will happen if we do that now?"  
Jared looks at me confused. "What?"  
"If we go to Doc now, Ian will see me. He'll be convinced that he was right after all and that I shouldn't be doing this. And then he'll be even more reluctant to let me train."  
"Does it matter Wanda? If we wait, he'll still see it, only later. And he'll feel the same about it."  
"I know, but at least I got some more training in if we wait."  
"I'm not waiting, I want that healed right now, I don't want to see you hurt like that."  
"It doesn't hurt that bad." It's more of a throbbing sensation in my cheek now. I can feel exactly where the wound is. And Jared knows it. Obviously I can't fool him.  
"You either walk with me or I pick you up. Which will seem worse?" Overprotective. All of them. I'm feeling warmth and frustration at the same time. At moments like this, I'm really not happy that they chose this weak, sweet, petite body for me. At this rate, I'm not ever going to get the chance to strengthen up.

Of course when we walk through the passages, people see my face. I hear some gasping, but no one asks. It might have something to do with the angry look on my face, it's not a familiar look to anyone. We didn't run into Ian, but I'm sure he'll hear soon. Doc used Heal on me and the wound isn't visible anymore. Jared wouldn't train with me anymore, so I decide to take a bath. I go get a towel and some clean clothes. As I turn around to walk out, Melanie's there.  
"Want some company?"  
"Are you done for today already?"  
"Just cooking duty tonight, but I don't think I'll need another bath after that." Mel smiles at me. "Just wait for me."  
We head to the bathing cave together and get into the water. Even though I was already wet, I'm really glad to step into the water. I feel clean almost immediately. I haven't even washed yet, but I feel so much better already.  
"Jared won't train you anymore."  
"I know."  
"He feels bad."  
"It isn't his fault though."  
"Try telling him that."  
"Hmpf."  
"You're mad." Mel tries to understand my mood.  
"Frustrated, really." Mel wants to say something again, when we hear a voice.

"Wanda? Are you in there?" Ian. It was only a matter of time before he'd come and see me.  
"Yes, I'm here." We can hear Ian coming into the cave.  
"I wouldn't mind if you stayed out there, Ian, I'm in here as well." Melanie calls out at him. Of course, it's dark in here, he wouldn't see anything, but I get what she means.  
"Oh, sorry Mel." Ians steps slow down, but he's not walking out.  
"Wanda? You're done training."  
I can practically _feel_ Mel rolling her eyes while she sighs. "Guys.", she mutters.

"Wanda?" Do I have to answer him right now?  
"Go away, Ian! Leave us to bathe." Sometimes I'm actually glad Mel is more blunt than I am.  
"Fine, we'll talk later." We can hear Ian walking out. Melanie bursts into giggles.  
"Yes, dad." I can't help but laugh with her.

As we get out of the water and dry off, we hear footsteps again.  
"Wanda!"  
Mel mutters: "Seriously, Ian?" Then she shouts: "We're almost done, just wait for us outside!"  
"Hurry Wanda, Jodi went to Docs, she's having contractions and she's asking for you."

I dress as fast as I can, leave Mel behind and run towards Doc with Ian.


	20. Chapter 20

**I do not own anything off the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 20.**

When we get to the hospital, we have to walk past a lot of people. It seems like everybody is here. Kyle is hovering over Jodi, Doc and Candy are standing beside them. Jared, Jamie and Jeb are in a corner and I can see that Mel caught up with me and is walking to stand with them. In the doorway and hall are still more people.  
"Ian, we have to get everybody out."  
"What?" There's a panicky feeling to the atmosphere in the room, Ian has it as well.

"Get them out. Jodi doesn't need everyone here."  
"Oh, yes, sure." He speaks up now. "Everybody out!" A few people start to move, but most of them just keep lingering. "Come on, guys, give Jodi her space. She doesn't need an audience here."  
Everyone seems to get that he's serious, and they start leaving the room and hallway.

"So, how are you feeling Jodi?" I walk up to her.  
"Fine, I'm just having some small contractions. Not regular at all, yet, but Kyle," Jodi rolls her eyes, "as soon as he realized I was having contractions, he wanted to get me in here. He wouldn't let me walk, so naturally everyone saw him carrying me and people started following us out. I just wish it had started at night, so no one would know it started."  
Everyone except for Doc, Candy, Kyle, Ian and me left the room now. I take Jodi's hand and squeeze it a bit.  
"You'll be fine, I know you can do it. Good luck." I stand up and nudge Ian to come with me.  
But Jodi speaks up: "I didn't send Ian to come and get you, just so that you could come and wish me luck. Wanda, you're my best friend here, I want you to stay. I need another woman in here. No offence, Candy."  
Candy smiles: "None taken."  
Ian and Kyle both stand frozen. They must both be wondering why Jodi wants me to be here. Kyle might be mad that Jodi wants a Soul here.

"We'll be right back, Jodes." Ian takes my arm and we walk into the passage. "Are you sure you want to stay?"  
"Why wouldn't I want to stay?"  
"Won't it be too hard for you?" So that is what he was thinking. Always concerned about me first.  
"I'm just worried that Kyle won't like me being there."  
"He'll be fine. He might have been a bit shocked, but he knows Jodi and you are close." Ian assures me. "I'll be nearby if you need me." Ian kisses me and walks away, I get back into the hospital.  
"Umpf." Jodi takes a deep breath. "It's not like it's hurting, but it's discomforting. It takes my breath away."  
"You should try to breathe through them Jodi. If you manage to breathe through the easy ones, right now, you'll be able to breathe through the hard ones when they come later." Candy instructs Jodi.  
"When is later?" Kyle asks.  
"It could be days. When it's a first baby, the average amount of time is about 48 hours from first contraction until delivery. But it could last longer. We just don't know." Kyle's face is becoming a bit more white.  
"Then why am I here already? If it can take days before this baby comes out, I could just do what I want right?"  
Doc answers now: "Yes, you could Jodi, but we thought you would like the privacy of being here."  
"Besides," Candy says, "the sooner you give in to it and relax, the faster it'll go. So just focus on your contractions, breath and think about your baby."

"Oooohhh. That. Hurts!"  
"Breathe through it Jodi, you can do it, it's going so well." I hold Jodi's hand.  
"I don't feel like it's going well at all!"  
It's early in the morning. Jodi's been having contractions for about 18 hours now. Last night, Kyle and I took turns sleeping. Jodi insisted that she'd manage, that we should just both go to sleep, but neither of us liked the idea of her having to deal with her contractions alone while we were sleeping. So we took turns, held her hand and encouraged her. When Kyle or I slept, we just took one of the extra beds here, but Candy and Doc have been taking turns in leaving the room. They slept in the recreation cave. I heard Doc telling Kyle that they wanted to relieve each other, so that when the actual birth is there, both of them would be feeling rested enough to both help.  
"Can't we just give her No Pain? Why don't you just give her No Pain, Doc?" Kyle's walks up to Doc who's sitting at his desk.  
"You know that Kyle," Doc replies patiently, "we can't use No Pain because we can't monitor the baby. The way Jodi's feeling is the only indication we have here."  
We had a conversation about it, a few months ago. The machines for monitoring a baby were just too big to smuggle out of the hospital. And they don't get moved from the hospitals either. Stealing machines like that just wasn't an option.  
Jodi's grabbing my hand again. Squeezing. Kind off hard, but I try not to let her notice. No doubt she is in way more pain. She's been having contractions every 7 to 8 minutes now. Candy already told Jodi that it will definitely not take 48 hours. I can hear Kyle talking on the other end of the room, he keeps insisting that Jodi gets something for the pain.  
"Stop complaining Kyle, it's bad enough already. Leave Doc alone." Jodi tells Kyle. I'm surprised that he just listens to her and comes back.

For the last two hours contractions have been coming every 4 to 5 minutes. Kyle has been trying to get Doc to give Jodi No Pain for over an hour now. Finally, when another contraction comes, Jodi lashes out.  
"Get out, Kyle! Stop complaining, help me through this or get out! You're the one who did this to me anyway, just leave!" With that last sentence, she sits up. The look on Kyle's face is so shocked that I almost laugh. Kyle gets up and walks to the door, but then Jodi starts yelling again.  
"What. Are. You. Doing?! Get back here, don't you dare leave me right now!" Kyle comes back, takes Jodi's hand and just keeps quiet.  
Ian walks in the room. We placed Jodi with her back to the entrance, so she doesn't see him, but I do. I look at Ian questioningly, but he shakes his head at me and nudges Doc to come out. Ian looks tense, what's that about? I don't let myself wonder about it though. Apparantly Kyle's out of words and Jodi needs someone to encourage her.  
With every contraction, Jodi reaches out with her hands to me and Kyle, to squeeze our hands.  
Doc walks in and starts collecting most of his medicine. Is there someone hurt out there? Doc looks a bit nervous, he isn't looking at me. I look back at the entrance, but there is no sight of Ian. What is this about? I consider leaving the hospital to find out, but I really don't want to leave Jodi here. It is not an option to leave right now, no matter how curious I am, it will have to wait. Doc walks out with the medicine, I can see he only left the things necessary for Jodi's delivery. He gathered everything fast.  
Jodi grabs my hand again and my attention shifts to her.  
"You're doing so well, Jodi, it won't be long before you'll be able to hold your baby." Candy tells Jodi. Kyle just sits there, let's Jodi squeeze his hand, but doesn't say anything anymore. He's sweating and looking pale. The nervousness is radiating from him. It makes me smile. It's so strange to see him like this. But also heart warming, it's his love for Jodi, he hates seeing her like this.  
Doc returns to the hospital and looks around as if he's searching for something. I raise my eyebrows to him and he understands that I want to know what's going on, but he shakes his head slightly. Jodi is focussing on her contractions and Kyle is focussing on her, but Candy notices Doc as well. She shrugs her shoulders at me; she doesn't know what this is about either.  
Jodi has progressed a lot; the contractions are only 2 minutes apart now. The baby will be coming soon.

And then Jared and Ian walk in together.  
"A word, Kyle?" Jared says.  
Kyle doesn't even look up. "It can wait."  
"No, bro, it really can't." Kyle does look up at that, Ian hasn't called him bro in a very, very long time. Kyle mumbles to Jodi "I'll be right back." and he gets up and walks just outside the entrance with Jared and Ian. At first they are speaking at a hushed tone, I can't make out what they are saying, but then Kyle practically shouts.  
"We can't move her right now, you idiots, she's in labor!" Kyle stalks back into the room, Jared and Ian follow closely behind him.  
"Don't you think we don't know that? But we have to leave, right now. It's way more dangerous staying in here. The caves aren't safe anymore."  
"You're not taking Jodi."  
"We _are_ taking all of you Kyle. Knocking you down and carrying you outside will take way more time and will be a lot harder, so I hope you'll just walk and help us lift Jodi, but we have to leave _now_."  
What? Leave now? Why would we have to leave? Jared said the caves aren't safe anymore? What happened? Ian looks at me.  
"Wanda, we'll explain later, but we need to go. Now. Please, come with us."  
"But what about Jodi?"  
"We're taking Jodi with-" Before Ian finishes his sentence, Jared cuts in.  
"You know, Wanda, we wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't necessary. There is no time to explain, it's no longer safe here and we need to leave now." My head clears up and I get into action. I turn to Jodi.  
"Jodi, sweetie, we are going to move you. It's really necessary, but you'll be safe. Candy, Doc, Kyle and I are staying right by your side." I nod at Ian and he and Jared lean in to pick up Jodi.  
"I will carry her." Kyle pushes the two men out of the way.

We all walk out of the hospital. To get to the exit we have to cross most of the caves. Which are empty. There is no one here. All the bedding in the recreation cave is still there. When we walk past the kitchen, I see plates, half empty or even full. It's all just left behind. Chairs have fallen over. I hear Jodi moan as she has another contraction. Kyle tries to slow down, but Jared is walking behind him and pushes him forward. Kyle looks angry, but doesn't respond and just walks on. Ian had taken my hand and is taking me through the caves at top speed. I'm out of breath, are we there yet? And then we get to the exit. I see several tracks, cars that have left already. Melanie and Jamie look relieved at the sight of Jared. Jared gets into the front with the two of them and the rest of us sit in the back of the truck. Someone has taken a mattress in here, just as Kyle has laid her down, the truck starts to move. Fast.


	21. Chapter 21

**I stayed up late to write this. Didn't want to leave you (and myself really) with such a cliff hanger. Unfortunately, I didn't get to finish, last night, but here it is now!  
By the way, if anyone has got a great idea for a better summary, let me know!  
**  
**I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 21.**

Ian's holding on to me, not letting go, but I wiggle out of his hold and go towards Jodi. Walking isn't an option at the speed this truck is driving, but I slide myself over to her. Doc and Candy are setting up some lamps so that we have light in here.  
"I need to throw up." Doc has quick thinking and hands me a bag, which I hold for Jodi to throw up in.  
"At least being on the move didn't slow down your contractions."  
"I can't have this baby in a truck." Jodi moans.  
"You're going to have the baby here, Jodi. The contractions are coming fast now, you will soon feel the urge to push. I'm going to check you now… Yes, you're fully dilated, the baby will be coming soon. If you feel the urge to push, just go along with it and push." I'm sitting next to Jodi, holding her hand, Kyle is on her other side. I can feel Ian behind me, even in this limited space, he wouldn't try and invade.  
"Honey, you are doing great, it won't be long before we can hold our baby." Kyle is trying to encourage Jodi, but she snaps at him.  
"Don't tell me that! You don't know that! You're not the one who has to push this baby out. I can't do it! I can't! It won't come, I'm sure of it." I look at Kyle, we both are a little lost for words.  
"Yes, you can, Jodi. You can do it. You'll have to do it. This is the turning point Jodi. Every mother has it in labour. When you get to the point where you think you really can't take it anymore, that's the point where the birthing process is changing and the baby will come. This baby _will_ come." Candy tells her.  
"That's easy for you to say, you're not the one doing it." Jodi's gasping for breath again at a contraction.

"I did it. I had children, before I was taken by the Souls. I've helped with deliveries in the hospital, when the Soul was inside me, so I have the medical knowledge. But I also did it myself, three times, so I can speak from experience as well." I'm a bit surprised by this news. Not because I think it's strange or didn't think she would be a mother, but Candy rarely gives us any information about her human life before the Souls.  
It got Jodi to calm down. I feel like she needed someone telling her that she could do it, someone who knew, for sure. Not someone knowing about the theory of it. Jodi takes a deep breath and lies down.  
"That's it, Jodi. Try to relax, the contractions will come. I know it's stressful right now, but try to relax. Try to breathe through the contractions like you did so well inside." When Jodi gets another contraction, she takes Kyles and my hand again, to squeeze them. I look at Kyle, we are back into the same pattern that we were inside.  
The truck takes a sharp turn, I think I'll fall, but Ian's hand steadies me. I mouth a thank you to him and then focus on Jodi again. A few contractions follow each other up shortly.

"I need to push!"  
"Okay, so push, just go along with it. Just follow your body." Candy encourages her.  
And so Jodi pushes. I just know my hand will turn blue from her squeezing. But I don't complain, off course not, this is about Jodi. Candy tells her she's really doing well.  
After fifteen minutes off pushing, with one final push and a big scream, Jodi pushes out the baby. Candy takes it and Doc hands her a blanket. Jodi stretches out her arms and Candy hands her the baby. Kyle is looking emotional, he puts a hand on the baby's back and kisses Jodi on her forehead. Jodi has let go of my hand so I slide back to Ian. I wouldn't tell anyone this, but I feel exhausted. I didn't get much sleep, my hand hurts and I had to run through the caves.  
I can't imagine how Jodi feels, she just had a baby and she's in a truck. Why are we in a truck? Where are we going? I don't get any of it. But I'm not going to talk about it now. Jodi and Kyle deserve what little kind of privacy we can provide for them. I hear Candy asking if Kyle wants to cut the umbilical cord, which he does.

We all just sit in silence for a while.  
When the truck takes another sharp turn, it's like everyone comes to their positives at once. We all have a lot of questions I think. When Kyle speaks up I realize that our priorities differ though.  
"What is it? A boy or a girl?"  
"I don't know Kyle, you look." Jodi tells him. Kyle lifts up the blanket covering the baby, a huge smile forming at his face.  
"It's a beautiful girl Jodes."  
After another moment of silence Doc asks: "Have you decided on a name yet?"  
Jodi smiles. "Yes, her name will be Helen." Ian stiffens a bit behind me and holds in his breath. I don't think Kyle noticed that, but he looks at Ian.  
"That's a lovely name Jodi." Candy tells her.  
Ian nods at Kyle, then puts his mouth by my ear. "That's my mother's name." He murmurs. I understand why Kyle looked at him.

I really want to know what's going on. Why we're in a truck right now. But I still don't want to distract Jodi and Kyle from that beautiful wonder. They deserve to just be happy for a bit before reality kicks back in. I lie down and Ian holds me.  
He whispers in my ear again: "I know you didn't get much sleep, I slept all night. Get some rest, my Wanderer."

I wake up from the truck stopping. Jared opens the doors and asks us to come out. We get out and I see we're in a forest. I don't see much of the forest though, another truck is there. It already has the doors open.  
"It's daytime, I know you were needed in the back, but could you come sit in the front for the rest of the drive? Well, at least for the daytime?" Jared looks at me.  
"Of course I will, do you need me to drive as well?"  
"No, you being there is enough. Jamie and Mel will go in the back." I know he would rather sit with Melanie, but he knows Ian won't let me sit in front without him. And Jared feels that he's needed in the front as well. Jared turns to the others.  
"If you need anything from this truck, get it and take it into the other one. We've still got a long trip ahead of us. Mel and Jamie will explain everything to you in the back."  
Jodi holds Helen and Kyle lifts them both up and gently sets Jodi down in the new truck. Doc and Candy take the bags filled with medicine. When Mel and Jamie are in as well, Jared closes the door. He walks to the front.  
"Let's go."

I thought the men would start explaining, but they don't. After just a few minutes of silence, I can't take it any longer. We've been driving for what feels like hours already. I need to know what happened now.  
"Why are we taking off?"  
Ian looks at me. "Sky got out."  
"What?"  
"She's been asking questions. And apparently some people slipped up, giving her little details. The details on their own wouldn't be important, but Sky must've added all the details up and found out some things."  
"How do you know people slipped up?" Are they just assuming that?  
"After we found out Sky was missing, we asked around as well and we put one and one together."

"So, she left the caves?"  
This time Jared answers. "Yes, she left somewhere in the night. I don't know what time exactly, but when we woke up, she was gone. Sky got outside and went straight for the cars – I can't believe someone slipped up on that! Because of the mud, it was a clear trail. We started packing up immediately."  
"Actually," Ian continues: "it wasn't much packing up. We told everyone that they could only take the things that they really didn't want to leave behind. Everyone got their things and went to the exit. Jared and Aaron went ahead and got both of the trucks. I went to Doc to warn him and Doc and I got all the medicine to the exit. When Aaron and Jared came with the trucks, everyone else went in the other truck, Jared has instructed Aaron about where to go." All of them in just the back of one truck. They must be really crammed up in there.  
"But what about the trails? If they come looking for us at the cave, they will follow the trail out of the desert."  
"We went the opposite direction. It's not exactly the direction we needed to take, but I didn't want to risk running into the Souls." Jared says. "As you could see, this truck is different from the one we had. I sent Aaron to a safe place as well, they switched up as well, but even closer to home."  
"So, where are we going now?"

"A safe place. Burns and Nick have been preparing it for our arrival. It was always the plan to go there, but we were going to wait until the rain had ended. That would give them enough time to set everything up."  
"Is it just the two of them?"  
"I'm sorry Wanda, but just to be sure, I'm not going to tell you anything until we get there. It's still possible that we get caught." Ian looks mad at Jared, but I understand what he means.  
"But how does Aaron know where to go?"

"I gave him some basic directions. He's going to wait for us at a safe point. From there he will follow me." I don't think I can take more information right now. Well, it's not like Jared would tell me more.  
"I can't believe Sky did that."  
"She never did choose our side, Wanda."  
"I know, Ian, it's just hard to realize that someone betrayed us." I'm sad that she did it. Sad that she didn't understand the point of what the humans are doing and what I am doing with them. I wish she would've understood.  
Jared pulls me out of my thoughts.  
"It's going to be a very long drive. If you need some rest, rest now, you look tired."  
"I already slept a few hours in the back, I'm feeling awake enough."  
"How did Jodi do?" We talk about the birth of beautiful Helen.


	22. Chapter 22

**Sorry for not updating earlier. I had three different story lines in my head. I had to pick one so typed out a few scribbles for all of them before deciding.**  
**I don't think this is my best work, but I really wanted to update :-) Please review!**

**I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 22.**

After a few hours of driving Jared stops the truck in the woods again. I don't get why he stops here, there's another truck over there, but then I see Aaron in the drivers seat of the other truck. Jared gets out of our truck to go talk to Aaron.  
We switch up a bit, so that the people in the trucks are more evenly divided. I stay in the front with Ian and Jared and we take off again.  
"So when will we be at the final stop?" I ask Jared.  
"The place where we just were is supposed to be watched. I know one more location. If the last place was watched well, then Nick or Burns should be waiting for us at the next spot. From there on they will drive."  
"So you don't know any end locations?" Ian asks.  
"No, for this, we decided that it's safest if only Souls know the location."  
"That's a lot of trust."  
"I know Ian." Jared looks at him, a bit pained. "It _is_ a lot of trust put into them, but we're certain about them. We know we can trust them, just as much as we can trust Wanda." I'm really glad he feels that way. Especially for Jared, it was hard to trust me. A lot of it had to do with me being in his girlfriends body, but he was also one of the people who in general had a harder time trusting the Souls than others. I'm glad that he trusts not only me, but Nick and Burns as well.

The next stop is an hour from the last one. I can see both Nick and Burns, waiting for us. Jared pulls over and we step outside.  
"Good to see all of you." Nick says.  
The other truck stops and Aaron gets out with Jeb. They open the back doors to both of the trucks, but explain to everyone that they can't get out yet. People seem happy to be getting fresh air again though. Jared and Burns shake hands.  
"Okay, so all of you, get in the back, we'll drive the rest of the way." Burns looks at me.  
"You can sit in the front with me, if you'd like." But I want to sit with Ian. I want him to hold me and not let go for a while. Well, not let go at all. Seeing Nick and Burns gives me a sense of safety. I feel my knees shaking, Ian notices and holds on to me tighter. With the relief I feel now, I know that for the past hours, I've been feeling scared, uptight and on edge. Ian tries to look me in the eyes, but I'm still looking at Burns and Nick.

"Wanda, are you okay?" Burns has a worried expression. Ian answers for me.  
"She'll be fine. Let's just go." Before Burns can answer, Ian takes me to the back of the truck. We get in with Jared. Before Burns closes the doors he hands us some food and water, he tells us to settle and relax, sleep if we want to. It's still going to be a long trip. We've been driving for almost the entire day, it's almost evening. And still more hours to come. I'm not liking the idea, but at least I have been spending most of the drive in the front. The rest have been crammed up in the back of the trucks the entire way.  
The atmosphere in the back of the truck is tense. Most people are focussed on Jodi and Helen. Everyone must feel scared and lost. Most of them have been living in the caves for years and now they lost a home. I snuggle up to Ian and let him hold me. I feel so save in his arms, I can't imagine life without him anymore.

After hours of driving, the truck stops. Burns opens the doors.  
"Everybody out, please."  
We all get out of the truck and I see the other truck is here as well. We're inside, in a garage. Burns is already on his way.  
"Let's not stay and talk here, we'll get you settled in first." He opens a door leading to a stair. People are already murmuring complaints behind me, but everyone follows Burns.  
When we get to the bottom of the stairs, we enter a hallway. Our group easily fits inside this hallway, it's big! I hear Melanie mumbling next to me.  
"Jeb isn't the only one who was paranoid."  
Before I can think about what he means with that comment, Burns goes through another door. We enter a large sitting room. The room is a square. In every wall it has a door. There are couches and chairs in here. Pillows on the floor. There's enough place for everyone to sit down and then still there are empty seats.  
Burns waits until everyone sits down, he and Nick stand in the center of the room.  
"I know you have been travelling all day long and I know everyone must be tired." Nick starts. "So we'll keep it short. If you go through the door on your right, it takes you to another hall. There are a lot of doors, they are all bedrooms. Choose a room to stay in. Most bedrooms can accommodate 2 persons, but there are a few that are for 1 and some for 3 or more to stay in. I suggest that, at least for this first night, you all just pick whatever room you want. All of the beds are made, so you don't need to worry about that.  
The door on your left leads to another hallway, from there you can get to the kitchen and some other rooms. Just get to the kitchen in the morning, there is food enough."  
He doesn't explain where the other door leads to. It must not be important enough to explain now.  
"Now, about where we are. We're in a bunker. We don't know why it was built, or when it was built. We do know that the Souls don't know that it's here. We've been searching for a save place for months all across the country when we found this. Burns and I came here weeks ago to prepare it for your arrival. It was always the plan for all of you to come here.  
Are there any questions right now?"  
People start talking at once.

"But _where_ is this bunker?"  
"What's in the other rooms?"  
"How can the Souls not know about this?"  
"Are we sure it's safe to trust _these_ Souls?"

Then Jeb stands up.  
"Okay, people! I can't go and say everyone has to listen to my rules, because this is not my house. But I am kindly suggesting right now that we let all questions wait until tomorrow. We have all been crammed up in the back of a truck all day, so we're all just plain sick of each other." Some people laugh at this comment.  
"And, some of us sat in the front, taking care of us, saving our lives today. Last of all, Jodi gave birth, I'm sure she wants some rest."  
At first, no one moves, but then Ian and Jared get up as well. It's almost funny how much they are alike with their loves; as Ian stands up he pulls me up with him and Jared does the same with Melanie. Mel smiles at me, I know she noticed the similarity as well.  
Neither Jared or Ian talk, they just walk out of the room, through the right door. As we leave the room, I can hear people getting up behind us.

Jared stops at the first room, it's for three persons, so he wants to walk on, but Jamie's voice stops him. "Could I sleep with the both of you for this one night?" I get that he doesn't want to sleep alone tonight. He's been through a lot today. He must have been so scared. Mel takes Jamie's hand. "Off course you can." I give Jamie a hug and Ian and I get into the second room, this one's meant for two.

"What do you think of all of this?"  
"I trust them Ian. Not just because they are Souls, but also because they have been proving themselves to the humans, like I did. I trust them. I believe we're safe here." Ian smiles at me.  
"I know, my Wanderer, but that's not what I meant. I trust them as well. I meant, what do you think about the bunker?"  
"It's… Overwhelming. How can this be here? Were humans really that paranoid?"  
"Some were. And apparantly they weren't wrong to be."  
"I guess you're right about that."  
Ian gets down on the bed.  
"Come lie with me."  
I lie down next to him and he holds me. His breathing steadies and I think he has fallen asleep, but then he sighs. I look up to him and I catch him staring at the ceiling.  
"Am I keeping you awake Wanda?" Of course he is. If he doesn't sleep, I don't sleep. But I don't tell him that.  
"No, sweetheart. But why aren't you sleeping?"  
"I'm really not tired. I haven't slept in the truck today." No, he was watching me. "But I really don't feel tired. I still feel filled up with adrenaline. We could have all been caught today. We could have all lost our lives. We – I – could have lost you today."  
I get up from the bed. "Well, I _did_ sleep in the truck today. And I'm not tired either. Let's go explore." We take to the sitting room, Burns and Nick are still sitting there, Jeb and Jared with them. Mel isn't there, she must be asleep. Ian just says one word.  
"Shower?" Burns points straight ahead, it's the door from which Nick said it would lead to the kitchen. In this hallway we see that the doors are labeled, so we find the bathroom fast. Ian pulls me in and we get under the shower. After showering, a lot of my energy has gone. We dry off and head back to our room, when we cross the sitting room Jared remarks: "Took you long enough." Of course I blush and he and Jeb laugh. Nick and Burns just seem a bit uncomfortable. Back in our room, we now both fall asleep easily.

As I wake, I feel safe as always. I'm in Ian's arms. But then I notice it's dark. Really dark. It usually isn't dark when I wake up. I open my eyes and sit up straigt. I feel disorientated. And then I remember. We're not in the caves, we had to evacuate and now we're in a bunker. I woke Ian up when I sat up. He pulls me back to him and starts kissing me in the neck.  
"It can wait." His mouth travels up to my ear.  
"Aren't you curious?" Ian's mouth goes back to my neck again.  
"Yes, but not _that_ curious." I sigh a little.  
"But… We…" He's kissing my collarbone now. I can feel his lips smiling against it.  
"Yes?" He teases me, as he kisses me again, making me shiver. I try again.  
"We… should…" Really, I give up, I pull Ian back up and kiss him back.  
And then we hear a door open, with that, the smell of fried eggs comes in. And Ian's stomach growls. We both laugh and reluctantly get up. We haven't eaten much yesterday. And I _am_ curious to find out more about this place.


	23. Chapter 23

**I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Please review! **

**Chapter 23.**

Most people are still in the kitchen, eating breakfast. Some of them are still in their bedrooms, but I know they will come soon as well. Ian and I sat down with Jamie. I don't see Jodi or Kyle anywhere, they must be wanting some privacy. As we eat, Nick stands up.  
"I would show you all around, but taking more than 30 people at once would be a bit much." Some people laugh, but most still look uneasy. I smile encouragingly at Nick.  
"So, I'll just let all of you explore yourselves. Because we are with a lot of people and of course, certain things need to be done, we decided to put up a schedule. It's the same as the schedule you used in the caves, just with other tasks. If you have any questions, Burns and I will be staying here in the kitchen. Enjoy your breakfast." Nick sits down again, I see Jeb nodding approvingly at him.  
I want to know a lot, I have a lot of questions. But I know other people are more anxious to find out things. I know I'm safe here, _we're_ safe here. The questions I can ask later. I stand up and take Ian's hand. I use the same sentence I did last night.  
"Let's go explore." Everyone seems to need it that someone goes first. They were all sitting still, even when they had finished their meals. But now that we got up, more people get up and walk out. Others go to Nick and Burns. We take the plates to the counter and leave the room. We don't even talk about it, but head towards the unexplained door. I'm most curious about what's there.

"Do you think we could get lost in the bunker, like in the caves?" I ask Ian.  
"I don't know, but what I've seen so far, the hallways are straight pathways. I figure this one just stops dead at the end and all you can do is turn around. And I think all of the hallways do. But it is big."  
He's right. We can't see the end of the hallway from where we stand now.  
"Just go door by door?"  
"Let's do the left first and when we head back, we take the right doors." Ian nods and we open the first door. It feels big, but I can't see yet, it's dark. I can see Ian from the little light we still have from the hallway, he moves left, holding the wall and then finds the light switch. This room _is_ big.  
"If I would have to name it," Ian says: "I would say it's the recreation cave." I agree. It's just a big, empty room. There's nothing in here. We can see that there are more doors in the wall. I think that if we walk through the hallway now, at least 5 or 6 doors will lead to this room. We walk back out and open more doors on our way through the hall. The rest of the rooms of the left all seem to be used as storage rooms. Full rooms. Sorted by what they hold. A room full of beds. A room full of cabinets. A room full of chairs. Nick and Burns are really well prepared. How many people could stay in this bunker? How did they get all of this here this fast? They left the caves only a few weeks ago. My questions will have to wait though.  
After 20 minutes we reach the end of the hall. Ian was right, it's a dead end.  
"If you like long walks, just walk around these caves." Ian laughs. We turn around and keep opening doors. All of these rooms are storing things again. But then Ian opens a door to a gym. This is perfect. I've been wanting to build strength I could do it in here. I walk into the room and look around. There are punching bags, mats, a boxing ring, a climbing wall. This is perfect for all the men to let of some steam. In the caves all they could take it out on was the fields, by working as hard as they could. Now they can actually exercise. And so can I.  
I catch Ian looking at me, he opens his mouth, but then Trudy and Geoffrey walk in. We chat for a bit about this new place and then go to the large sitting room again. Ian asks if I want to look around more, or maybe get some rest. I don't see why I would need rest. Yesterday was emotional, yes, but not physically demanding. We decide to go to the kitchen first.

It's less busy in the kitchen now. Most people have walked out, getting to know this bunker. Nick is still talking to Lilly, but Burns is sitting alone. We walk up to him.  
"Nick is more like a leader then I am, everyone goes to him for questions. Well, some came to ask me some things, but I didn't get that many questions." Burns smiles.  
Ian and I sit down at the table.  
"Have you both slept well?" Burns asks. "We are planning to assign the rooms permanent this afternoon, as soon as everyone has had a chance to look around."  
"We slept just fine, thank you." Ian answers for us.  
"Burns, how did the two of you get all of this done? You just left our caves a couple of weeks ago. How could you have found this place and get it ready for us in such a short time?" I ask Burns.  
"We didn't. We found this place more than six months ago. We started stocking up back then. Have you seen everything already?"  
"No, we haven't looked through all of the rooms in this hallway yet, just the middle one."  
"Well, this hallway has a lot to offer. We have a very large pantry. We've been filling it for months, all preservable products. It also has four freezers and six refrigerators. We've been driving around, getting supplies daily. When someone asked about the large amounts we were taking, we said it was for work, or a party. As long as we fill up daily, we won't run out of supplies here."  
"Did the two of you did all of this alone? It still seems like a lot of work for just two."  
"Well, we had help. We found more Soul sympathisers." What? More Souls on the human side?  
"Why aren't they here then?" Ian asks.  
"They are living in the house above this bunker."  
"Do they know any more human survivors?"  
"We know about some small groups, nothing as big as yours though. The plan is to get everyone here." Burns answers. Ian looks shocked at the idea.  
"Won't that be dangerous? Getting everyone on one location?"  
"It seems like it would be more dangerous, if one gets caught, all of the humans get caught. But right now, we have six Souls – seven if Wanda will come up – there is no need for humans to go outside anymore, which makes the risk of getting caught very slight."  
"We can't go outside at all?" Ian doesn't look happy. At the caves, we could get out every once in a while. We weren't near human population, so even during the day, we could get fresh air.  
"We plan on letting people come up at night, maybe two or three at a time. You can get outside through the house and get some fresh air. But during the day, it is too dangerous, for now." For now? Will it be safe later? Before I can ask anything, Ian talks again.  
"So, we are in a bunker, hidden by Souls who are living in the house above us and the plan is to get all the humans we know in here. How many humans will there be joining?"  
"The small groups we found are another twenty-eight. The three other groups you know as well have forty persons now. So at least, sixty, seventy more people.  
"So there will be more than a hundred persons in here."  
"Yes." Burns smiles. "And room for more. This bunker could accommodate one hundred and fifty persons. If we switch up some of the other rooms, more. Right now, the bunker also has rooms for entertainment purposes; books, the gym, games, television and even computers. But we could clear out some of those rooms and get more beds." Burns looks a bit lost in thought. "Everything you could think of, it's here. The only thing we couldn't provide is a Soul hospital. We managed to get medicine, like Wanda did. But we couldn't get hospital equipment."

I'm amazed by all that's here. People won't get bored easily anymore. That's a good thing, not getting bored. But it also can lead to people not wanting to get to their chores. On the other side, they don't seem to like Soul television, so I guess they won't like watching it anyway. Then I think of something.  
"How can we have electricity in here? The Souls will notice that you're using a lot of electricity at this bunker, they will think it's from the house, but we Souls don't waste, not even energy."  
"Most Souls have switched to solar panels. We did that for this house as well. This way the use of energy isn't stored."  
"But what about the water then? Won't they notice you're using a lot of water?"  
"We have been collecting rain water. The water in the showers and the bathrooms is used for that. So we're also scheduling shower times, because it's not raining much. We have more rain than you used to have in the caves, but not that much more. The faucets in the kitchen have clean, drinkable water, but we'll only use it for cooking. If you want to drink water, you'll have to get it from the pantry." They thought it all through, the Souls won't have any indication from energy or water that there are more people here.  
"Thank you, Burns, for answering our questions." Ian looks at me now. "Ready to look at the rest of this bunker?"

We walk out and decide to go through this hallway the same way we did the other one. Ian opens the first door, next to the kitchen. In the kitchen we saw a door behind the counter, it also leads to this room. In the kitchen we have two stoves to cook on. In this room there are two large ovens, 1 refrigerator, and two dishwashers. That's a relief, we won't have to do the dishes by hand anymore.  
The next room has a label 'Washing room'. Wow. One side of the room has 6 washers. The other side has 6 dryers. Not washing any more clothes by hand either! What a luxury! Ian doesn't care that much – of course not, he never did wash up his own clothes – he's already at the door.  
We walk in the pantry. Even though Burns just told us about everything that's in here, it's still a shock to see. It _is_ big. It holds a lot, it's all stacked up like in a store.  
I'm overwhelmed by all of this. I hold Ian's hand and we walk past all the other rooms, most of them we just open the door and take a glimpse inside. Computer room, television room, library. More and more storage rooms.  
We have seen everything in here now, well not all bedrooms, but we don't need to see every single one of them. We walk back to our bedroom, to get some alone time. We're not talking, it's a comfortable silence. In the hallway to the bedrooms, we run into Kyle.  
"Oh good, I found the two of you, Jodi has been asking for the two of you."  
We follow Kyle to their bedroom. There's even a cradle in here. Kyle sees me looking at it.  
"Nick gave it to us last night. When they went to get this place ready, they knew Jodi was pregnant, so they have everything that could be needed for a baby." Very thoughtful of them.

"Hey Wanda, Ian! I'm glad to see you!"  
Ian walks up to her and gives her a kiss on the cheek. "Hey Jodes." I hug her. "How are you feeling?"  
"I'm feeling great! Candy came to check up on me and Helen this morning. She said we are both doing good. She wants me to rest up some more though." Jodi doesn't look happy at that. I think she's curious about everything in the bunker as well.  
Kyle took Helen and walks up to Ian. "You're an uncle now, hold your niece."  
Ian takes Helen from Kyle and sits down. He's captivated by Helen's lovely face. I'm captivated by seeing Ian with her. I feel love flowing through me. My Ian holding his niece, such a small baby in his big hands. At the same time I feel a flash of pain. That could have been our baby in his hands, but it isn't. I wonder if those flashes of pain will ever go away.  
Ian looks up at me and smiles. I can see in his eyes that he understands.


	24. Chapter 24

**I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 24.  
**  
At lunch, Jared stands up.  
"Everyone, please listen up." He waits until the room is quiet. "We've had all morning to look around and get to know this place. We'd like to permanently assign rooms to everyone. Right now, we've got more rooms than people, but soon, the other humans will join us."  
Some people start talking. I know Nick, Burns, Jared and Jeb have been explaining the plan to people this morning, but it wasn't discussed in the group yet, so not everybody knows. Jared just waits it out.

"As I said; since the other humans will be joining us, we can't go and use all rooms. People will have to share. Obviously, couples will share a room, but some other people are going to have to share as well. There are a few rooms suited for 3. One of those will go to Lucina and her kids, one is for Kyle and Jodi and the other ones will be for people still coming in, there will be some more children coming. If you're fine with the room you had, just stay there, if you would like another, switch up. First come, first pick, so we get to choose. Just, do share, we can't have every two-persons room just having one person in it. If you change rooms, just take the bedding off and bring it to the laundry room. Then we'll wash it before the new group arrives."  
"When will the next group be here?"  
"We expect them no sooner than three weeks from now." Jared pauses, waiting for more questions, but no one asks anything, so he continues.  
"We put up a schedule for the tasks that need to be done, apart from that we want to put up a schedule for showering. We can't all shower whenever we want to; we will run out of water fast if we do that. This place runs on solar panels, the water we use is rain water, so don't drink from any faucet in these bunkers. The only exceptions are the faucets in the kitchen, but we will only use that water for cooking, drinking water can be found in the storage room."  
Most people get up now to choose a room. Some stay to ask Jared some more questions.  
"Do you want another room, Wanderer?" Ian whispers in my ear.  
"I'm fine in the room we have, but if you want another one, that's fine with me." I smile at him.  
"I don't care which room we have, as long as it's you and me in there." I nod, agreeing with him.  
We check the schedule. I get to do the dishes today, Ian is free for the next few hours, but has to help cook dinner. I look at the schedule; the only tasks are cleaning and cooking. Of course, we don't need to do manual labour anymore. I don't know how happy the guys will be with this. I kiss Ian on the lips.  
"Go. Go relax, or whatever it is you want to do. I'll see you at dinner."

And so our live in the bunker begins.

-

Everyone adjusts really well. With all the luxury here, the tasks that need to be done are relatively small. If you're on laundry duty, all you have to do is throw it in. Someone else is on folding duty. The tasks are divided in such a way that it never takes up a lot of time. Cooking is the biggest task, but everyone is scheduled for it only once a week. And if you have to cook a day, you don't get any other task for that day. Well, mostly you only get one task a day.

Almost everyone is playing soccer in the largest room, but even though I have been starting to exercise the last few weeks, I'm still not at a level where I can participate a soccer game. I'm walking through the hall, towards a smaller room. This room is empty as well, but I brought a radio in here. When someone turned on a cd in the sitting area one evening, one song stirred one of Pet's memories. She danced. And she was good at it. She had studied different styles of dance; ballet, contemporary, jazz, even some hiphop, but that last one not long, she didn't like it that much. I took a radio and found an empty room. I kept the radio here and whenever I get the chance, I come to this room to dance. I love it. The flow of my body, fluent movements. Losing myself in the music, in both choreographies I can remember as well as when I just dance from the heart. I have to dance alone though. Ian can't. He isn't trained, but he doesn't like it that much either. But I don't mind.  
I turn on the music and walk to the center of the room. I requested some mirrors from Nick, so I can see what I'm doing. But most of the time I just dance with my eyes closed. That's what I do today as well. Which is why I don't notice someone coming in. I suddenly feel arms around my waist. A careful touch, strong but kind. He clearly knows the choreography I'm dancing – I was supposed to make a lift, but normally I skip that part – he lifts me up and puts me down again. Almost dropping me at it, because halfway the lift, I realize that he's a stranger. Of course he is. No one in here knows how to dance. In silence, I look at him and he looks back at me. He's a Soul.  
"You must be Wanderer."  
"Wanda."  
"Ah yes, Wanda."  
We stay silent for another moment. I'm thinking fast. He knows my name. That must mean he's on our side right? He doesn't look threatening. He must have come with a new group of humans.  
"I'm Will. Another group just arrived an hour ago. Jared and Nick welcomed them in the sitting area. They were told to pick a room and go to get to know this place. I thought I'd look around as well and here I found you. Seeing you're a Soul, I knew you had to be Wanda. You dance beautifully."  
He looks straight at me. His eyes haven't left mine for a second. I'm starting to feel a bit uncomfortable at his gaze.  
As if he knows what I'm thinking, he looks away.  
"Would you like to meet the new group?" Will smiles and looks at me again. I just nod.

We walk out together, to the sitting area.  
"Which.." My voice cracks, so I try again. "Which group did you come with?"  
"I actually didn't stay with a human group. I just escorted them in. I live in the small town above this bunker."  
What? How many Souls know about this? I thought there were just a few Souls, living in the house above us. Will makes it sound like there are a lot more.  
"There are more Soul sympathizers in the town, Wanda. I actually came down because I wanted to talk to you."  
"What do you want to talk about?"  
"Oh, it can wait a bit longer. I know you will like to have Ian with you. And I'm curious to meet him as well."  
He knows about Ian as well. Well, we aren't a secret. And I know that other Souls talk about me, but still, it's strange meeting someone who seems to know everything about you. We walk through the last door and are in the main sitting area. I only see one or two new people, but there must be more. I walk towards the kitchen and Will follows me. Before I open the door, I can hear someone shouting in there.

"I'm the teacher here. I have taught the children all they know! You can't just come in here and take that away from me!"  
Sharon is standing in front of a new human. He's sitting down, looking calm, but also looking a bit scared at Sharon. Doc is standing next to Sharon, I see Jeb and Nick standing with the new man.  
"Sharon." Doc starts. "He's got a degree. He's been teaching the children at his group as well. It'll be.."  
"I've been teaching the kids since we were in the caves!" Sharon interrupts him. She's really mad.  
"And you did a fine job, Sharon. But now we've got another teacher, someone who knows more than the basics. It'll be better for the kids." Jeb kindly but firmly tells Sharon. She turns around and walks past me, shooting me and Will a mad look. Doc looks at everyone with an apologetic look on his face and takes after her.  
"What was that about?"  
Ian. I feel my shoulders release the tension I didn't even know they were holding. My hand slides into his, I can see Will noticing. Ian leans in to kiss me, but something about Will's look makes me turn away and head for a table. I don't let go of Ian's hand though.  
Nick sees us walking in and he waves at Burns, they both come to us.  
"Good. We wanted to talk to you Wanda." Nick says to me, Burns smiles encouragingly. They both sit down as well.

Burns brought all of us tea, I take a cup from him. Ian's looking strangely at me from one side and Will is doing the same from the other side. I'm keeping my eyes on my tea. I look up at Nick as he starts to talk.  
"We would like you to go up, Wanda."  
Ian sits up straigt. "Up? What do you mean up? You mean into the Soul World? She's not going anywhere."  
Always jumping to conclusions, that man. I do agree with him, but I want to know the rest of the story first.  
"We have been getting more Souls on our side in the village." Will says.  
"What?" Ian falls quiet.  
"In the village, we have several Souls on our side. They live in different houses throughout the town. We're trying to get as many Souls as possible before we get to the next part of our plan."  
Plan? Next part? What is this about?  
"That seems risky. More Souls knowing about the humans, what if there is someone you can't trust?"  
"It is risky, but it's part of the plan, we can't do it without them. We are moving as fast as we can, but we need everyone we can get. Which is why we're asking Wanda to come up and help."  
"Help do what?" I ask him.  
"Most of all, we need numbers up there. But also to help find more sympathisers."  
"Why do you need numbers of Souls up there? Didn't I just say – and you agreed – that the more Souls know, the more dangerous it is for us humans?"  
"Yes, Ian, but we need numbers fast, so we can move fast."  
Before Ian can say something, I cut in. "Then, what is this plan?"

"We're going to get the humans their world back, starting with this village."


	25. Chapter 25

**Took me some time... I had surgery and couldn't write.. I'll try to update sooner. Please review!**

I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)

**Chapter 25.**

Ian and I just fall quiet. How? I don't see how they will make that work. I know that Ian doesn't get it either, he isn't saying anything. Before I get to ask, Will starts again.  
"We've been getting Souls on our side. There are several Souls on our side, so that the other Souls in the town don't suspect anything. We want to do it at night, take out the Souls and send them off."  
I feel this is wrong on so many levels. I have a lot of objections against this and I don't even know where to start with it. But I have to start somewhere.  
"But how do you decide? How do you decide which Soul gets to stay and which one has to go? The Souls on our side obviously aren't going to be removed. But if you keep them in, you're still not letting the humans get their world back. Take Nick, he is still in there with the Soul. But because Nick is on our side, he doesn't get his body back? We can't just go and randomly pick which human gets to come back and which one doesn't."  
Will tries to cut in, but I just keep talking, while I stand up.  
"And what when a human doesn't return in his body? Do you put the Soul back in? Which Soul? How do you decide which Soul gets to stay?  
And what about humans who won't accept us? Look at Sharon, Maggie, Kyle how he used to be. They haven't really hurt me, but Kyle tried. There will be more humans who won't accept us Souls, even if we are on their side. If you get back more humans and the hating humans become a group, they could hurt us."  
Ian takes my hand. "I would never let anything happen to you."  
"Please sit down, Wanda." Will smiles at me. "Let me explain to you."  
Ian squeezes my hand and I sit down.

"When we start, we're going to take out the Souls from the bodies in this village. We won't take out sympathisers yet. We just regain every body. The humans that come back, will come to the bunkers. The humans that don't come back, will get another Soul in their body. One of the sympathising Souls. It's like you, being placed into that body. The host didn't return, so in order to save the body, a Soul had to go in."  
When I start to say something again, Nick says something first.  
"It isn't ideal, but what is? We can't let the humans stay underground for the rest of their lives. They want their world back and we think they deserve it, would we be on their side if we didn't believe that? The Souls on our side, we don't like the idea of having to jump to another host, but we have hope that most humans will return."

"I don't know what to do about humans who still won't accept us, but we're going to let the humans deal with that themselves. It's time we stop meddling into their lives." Will states.  
"We want to get all humans back that we can. The ones that can't come back, will have Souls. And then hopefully. we'll be able to live in peace together."

"We would like you to come up, so you can become a familiar face in the village. And like I said, we can use all the - "  
"No."  
Will stops mid-sentence and looks at Ian. "What?"  
"No. Wanda will not go up. She has already endangered herself enough for us humans."  
"It won't really be dangerous. She won't have to steal for you."  
"You want her to find more sympathisers. What if she comes across a Seeker? What if she finds someone who says he is on the human's side, but then goes to the authorities and gets her first? I'm not taking that risk with her."  
Ian has let go of my hand, but I reach out to him now.  
"Ian…"  
"No, Wanda."  
"Ian, I'm not going."  
"You can't – what?"  
"I'm not going up. I want to help, but I'm not going up." I look at the three Souls. "I'm sorry, but I can't. It would mean being up there and not seeing Ian. Or Jamie, Wanda, my friends."  
"I'm here now." Will says.  
"Yes, but for the first time in a month. I wouldn't be able to go down daily. And I can't miss them that long."  
"How long do you think it will take, Wanda? The plan is to start in three weeks."  
I look at Ian. I didn't want to do this. I thought it would mean months. I didn't think they were this far into the plan. Ian looks back and his face changes from relief to tense again.  
"Not even for a few weeks Wanda. You can't. _I_ can't. It's still too dangerous." Ian's pleading. He knows I've already decided.  
"She will be with me, Ian."  
"What do you mean, I'll get a job near you?" I look at Will.  
"No, you'll play my partner who came over from another town."  
Wills partner? That makes me think twice about this. But still…  
"Come on, we're going to our room." Ian gently pulls me with him, if I wanted, I could easily break loose from his grip.  
"I'm going back up in three hours, Wanda." Will tells me, after Ian pulls me out of the room.

Ian doesn't lead me to our room though. He stops at Kyle's room and knocks.  
"Jodes, are you in there?"  
"Yeah, come on in!"  
We walk in, Jodi is sitting on a chair, breastfeeding Helen.  
"Oh, I'm sorry." Ian wants to head out, but Jodi stops him.  
"Seriously, I'm not going to hide every time I feed her, I said come in, didn't I?"

We sit down and talk about the wonder that a baby is. I get to hold Helen for a while. When Jodi first handed Helen over to me, I felt strange holding her. I didn't want to let it show, but Jodi noticed anyway. We were alone and she told me it was okay. She couldn't relate, but did understand.  
Jodi says Helen needs to sleep and that she'll take a nap herself, so Ian and I take off.

Almost immediately we walk into Jamie.  
"Good, Jamie, I was looking for you! Let's go play a game." We walk to a room, sit down and take a board game. Jamie's talking a lot about how he likes this new life in here. The little chores we have to do. And then Melanie walks by.  
"Come sit with us, Mel!"  
Melanie looks a bit surprised at Ian's enthusiasm, but she sits down as well. I lean over to Ian and whisper in his ear.  
"I know what you're doing."  
"That's okay." He says cheerfully. Mel and Jamie look up at his comment, but Ian ignores them and continues the game. I get up.  
"I need to go to the bathroom, I'll be right back."  
Ian immediately stands up as well. "I'll come with you."  
"Don't be ridiculous." I snap at him. "I can go to the bathroom alone, I will be right back." Ian looks a bit hurt, but I'm too annoyed, I stalk off.

When I walk around the corner, Jared is standing there.  
"I was waiting for you."  
"Off course you were."  
"You should go." He says.

I stand still and look at him.  
"Why?" I ask him.  
"It would benefit everyone. We humans can be irrational. We would sacrifice everything for one person we love. Ian isn't looking at this rationally. He wants you to stay. For himself, for you, for us. So that you can be safe. But you know as well as I do, that up there, every Soul on our side, is needed. You need to go."  
Jared is right. And I do agree with him. I just feel a slight twinge of hurt inside. He _is_ always practical. But my irrational emotions want him to not want me to go.  
"Will is still waiting in the kitchen, you should go now."  
"If you're suggesting what I think you're suggesting; that's not going to happen. I'm not leaving without saying goodbye to Ian."  
"It would be easier." Jared says.  
"Not at all. Not for him, not for me. I want to say goodbye, he doesn't need to feel left. I did that to him once, I'm not doing it again."  
I know Jared is practical, but leaving without a word? I can't believe he suggested it. Jared's face hardens, but in his eyes I see he respects my choice.  
"Do you want me to come with you?"  
"Absolutely not." I turn around and go back to the group I left.

"Ian, come with me." Mel looks up, not even surprised, she knew. Jamie does look surprised though, but before he says anything, Melanie takes his arm and shakes her head. Ian doesn't look happy but walks with me. As we leave the room, we pass Jared. I feel Ian's hand tighten on my arm and I know he realises that I've been talking to Jared. When we get to our room, Ian turns me around.

"Please don't go. I can't stand the idea of it. Even a few weeks, it's too long. We can't protect you. I can't protect you!"  
"Ian, you know I have to do this." I repeat part of Jared's words to him. "Humans – human emotions – are irrational. You would sacrifice a lot for me. You just want to keep me. And I get that. I feel the same about you. I _would_ always choose you. But doing this, that is also for you. It's for you, it's for Jamie, Melanie, Jodi and Helen; everyone. And by that, it's for _me_. I don't feel like I need to, I want to! I want to help getting you your world back. I want to help to get you safe. Not just safe in hiding, but safe in your world. Ian, you would've let Sunny go, if she were still here. You would let Burns or Nick go. You're just not willing to let _me_ go. But I have to do this. And you know I do."  
Ian looks defeated. His breath leaves his body. He walks the one step towards me, holds me and whispers in my ear.  
"I know. I know you do. I know you have to, my Wanderer."


	26. Chapter 26

**I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 26.**

After I say goodbye to everyone, we go up the stairs, to the garage. Nick and Burns are taking us. They blindfold us both and we go to our home. My home for the time being. It's evening, that gives Will and me time to work on our story before we go outside tomorrow. Will takes me inside and shows me the bedroom.  
"This will be your bedroom, I'll remove my stuff as soon as I get the chance."  
"You don't have to do that."  
Will looks at me. "You want to both sleep in this room?"  
"No!" I take a breath. "No, that's not what I meant. This is your room. You don't have to leave it for me. I'll be fine in the guest room. Really, I insist."  
Will shows me the guest room and we head back down.  
"Do you want something to eat?"  
I skipped dinner at the bunker, so yes, I do. Will makes us both dinner and then we sit down.  
"So, what's the story?" I ask Will.  
"We're going to pretend to be partners. Even before we were on this world. The story is that we were partners on the Singing World. You left there before I did. When I got to this world, I knew you had to be doing something with your love for music. My Host is a trained dancer and I assumed you would be as well. I found you in another town, where you were giving a performance. You realized it is me and came here with me. My neighbours know that I was out of town. Since it was dark, we will just say that we arrived late in the evening – which we just did."  
"So, you are working as a dancer?"  
"Yes, I both perform and teach. I would like you to come teach as well, but if you'd prefer just to perform, that's okay."  
"I'll teach. I've taught before, not in dance, but still. I'd like to teach."  
"Perfect. Is there anything else you'd like to know now?"  
"No, I'm just tired. I'll help you with the dishes and then I'm off to bed."  
We take the plates and wash them up. I see Will has a dishwasher, but neither of us seems to mind doing the dishes by hand. I tell Will goodnight and head to my room. It doesn't take me long to fall asleep.

I've been working at the studio for a week now. The first day at the dance studio felt a bit strange. I felt nervous. I was afraid I would give something away. And even though he is treating me with a lot of respect, it felt strange pretending to be Will's partner. The looks he gives me… But this arrangement isn't for long and I just keep in mind that I'll be able to hold Ian again soon. So I went into the studio, Will introduced me and we started teaching together. Both he and the students were happy that he had a dancing partner to help instruct now, it made things easier. And I love the dancing! The teaching as well. It's so satisfying to do. If this would have been the first body I got when I arrived at this world, I believe I still would have done this.  
I'm meeting a lot of new Souls. Will introduced me to some sympathizers as well. There are more than I expected.  
In the evening we invite other Souls over, usually small groups. If we invite four people, at least two of them are also sympathizers. And then we try to find out how the other two people feel about the humans. Are they just scared of the humans? Are they really against the humans? We have to be careful about it. If we talk to the wrong person, they could still easily send Seekers at us. But since we are all Souls, the chance of Seekers actually thinking that we would do harm, isn't a real threat. If they would come asking questions, we could just pretend that all we do is pity the humans, feel sorry for them. Will and I never bring up to anyone that we know that there are still humans. The only Souls that do know about that, have heard from Nick or Burns.  
The two of them are really the ones in the most danger. When Will and I came out of the bunker, we still didn't know where we came from. I still don't know the location of the bunker. I know there are humans. But I don't know where they are. Burns and Nick are still the only ones that do. So if we got caught at it, the two of them would be in the most danger. Well, them, but the humans even more.

I'm staying with Will for a week now. Just like in the bunker, I take time alone to dance. I'm in the studio almost all the time. Practicing solo's, trying to find out how to explain certain moves in the lessons. This evening, he comes up to me. We had dinner at the house and then I left for the studio. During dinner, he kept looking at me with his intense look. For the week I have been here, he hasn't done anything wrong. He's been friendly, polite and – like he felt I need it – kept his distance from me. But he's always looking at me so intensely. It gives me a weird feeling. And then I feel a bit guilty for that feeling. Maybe he's just really engaged in all conversations he has. That he just gives you his full attention whenever he is talking to you. But it's still there, the feeling. I can't shake it off completely, it got worse when I caught him looking at me at other times as well. In class, it makes sense, when you dance together, you look at each other. When I am instructing the group, everyone looks at me, so of course he does at well. But when we have guests, I catch him looking at me as well.

"I would like to practice the duet that we're going to teach the class tomorrow."  
I nod at him, change the music and then we start to dance. As always, I get lost in the dance. I feel like I'm flying. Dancing solo makes me feel good, but dancing with a partner makes me feel great. We go through the dance once. Will points out the hard bits and suggests we do it again, so we do the routine again. When we finish the routine, I'm out of breath, I want to let go and step back, but Will doesn't let go. I look up at him and he is looking at me intensely. And then his eyes close and his head comes down. He's going to kiss me! I can't step back, he's holding me too tight, but I manage to turn my head and he kisses my cheek.  
"What are you doing!"  
I take a few steps back from him, but he just walks with me.  
"Wanderer, we would be perfect together. I'm a much better fit for you than that human is."  
"You say 'human' like it's a bad thing."  
I walk to the other side of the room and this time he stays where he is.  
"Humans aren't bad. But I do think a Soul should be with another Soul. You don't have to change yourself for me. I have seen you this week, you looked happy with me."  
"I'm happy because of the dancing, Will. I'm happy because I get to walk outside. I'm happy because of the teaching."  
"Because of the interaction you have with other Souls! Don't tell me you haven't missed that."  
"I won't. I am happy to have interaction, but it doesn't matter to me that they are Souls. I was just as happy with the humans, the only difference was that I was hiding and now I'm not."  
"Wanderer."  
Will takes another step towards me again.  
"Please don't Will, I'm with Ian. Do not make this any harder."  
"You seemed happy, you seemed to like me."  
"I do like you, but I'm not in love with you."  
Have I led him on? I don't believe I have. I haven't treated him any different than I treated Nick or Burns, or any of the humans at the bunker. I can't imagine him thinking that I encouraged this.  
"Wanda, like I said, with me, you could be yourself. You don't have to change yourself. I am of your kind."  
"I don't change myself for Ian. You want me to change myself for you! This past week, I may have seemed happy, but I missed the interaction with humans. I missed that humans _do_ disagree on things. The disagreeing, the sarcasm, the conflicts, it's what make things real, more worth it. We Souls, we always get along, we don't think about ourselves. But with the humans, I realised that because of the bad things, we appreciate the good a lot more. Because of the hurt, the love feels so much more intense and better. And _you_ want me to give that up. _You_ want me to change. You insist on calling me Wanderer, I have told you a number of times, my name is Wanda. And you don't want Wanda, you want Wanderer. That's not me."  
Will looks at me with a pained expression on his face.  
"You don't know. You haven't lived with the humans. Because of your goodness, your kindness, you believe they should have their world back, or at least, that we should share it. But you don't truly understand what it is to be human. And I don't blame you for it, of course you don't. But I do. I am changed, from within. I didn't change myself for the humans, I changed because of them."  
Now he looks defeated, he's looking at the floor.  
"I'm so sorry, Wanderer."  
"Wanda."  
His head snaps up.  
"Wanda. Of course."  
Will walks past me and goes to the house. I keep looking at him until he is inside. Just as I want to turn around, I see someone walking up to the front door.

"Burns!"  
He turns around and smiles at me.  
"Hey Wanda, I'm here for you."  
When I reach him, he lowers his voice.  
"How would you like to go home for a few hours?"  
I don't think he knows how right he is in what he just said. Home. I'm going to see Ian!  
"You have no idea. Let me just change into other clothes, I just finished dancing."  
Burns and I walk in together, Will comes out of the kitchen. I leave the two of them to talk and run upstairs to change. When I get back down, Will wishes me good night, I will see him in the morning. Burns takes me to the car and blindfolds me, I still can't know the location of the bunker.  
"As you know, it isn't a long ride, Wanda."  
We sit in silence as we ride.  
"I'm sorry, Wanda, I have to ask, is Will feeling sick? Or is there anything else wrong? He was quiet when you were upstairs changing, but also, the way you parted, it seemed a bit awkward."  
I explain to Burns what happened and he stays silent. I can't see him, so I can't read his expression trying to find out more about what he's thinking. He stops the car.  
"Here we are, you can take that off."  
I take off the blindfold, Burns has already left the car. He opens my door, takes my arm and steadies me. He looks me in the eyes.  
"I'm sorry for what happened with Will. I'll discuss it with Nick and Jared right away. I'm not taking you back there tomorrow."  
Before I can even respond, he opens the door and we walk down the stairs. It's late, but the sitting area seems to be full with the people I love. Jamie, Jared, Melanie, Jodi and Kyle… I don't see Ian at first sight, so I want to turn. But before I can move, I get pulled into those arms. Those arms I know so well.  
My love.


	27. Chapter 27

**I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 27.**

"You have to leave in another hour." Ian grunts.  
We're lying in bed. Being in the sitting area, talking to Jamie, Melanie, Jodi and the others, it only lasted an hour before Ian took me to our room.  
"I don't think so, sweetheart. I'm not going back to Will."  
Ian sits up.  
"You're not going back up?"  
"I'm not going back to Will."  
"Why? What happened?"  
I explain to him what happened that night and what Burns said. Ian gets up, pulls on a shirt and pants and throws me my dress. Always immediately into action.

So we go to the kitchen. It's late, but from former visits, we know Burns and Nick will still be there talking to Jared. Ian and I walk up to them and we sit down.  
"We were just talking about you." Nick looks at me and smiles.  
"What are you going to do about it?"  
"Ian, what do you want us to do? We still need numbers up there, we would like Wanda to go back out."  
"She's not going back to Will!"  
"We wouldn't ask that of her." Burns says. "We want to take her to Linda. Linda is single, living alone and a teacher at a primary school. The school has a position for a general arts teacher. Wanda has taught before, she could teach the children some dancing. But also painting, music, creative things."  
"This village isn't that big, what will people say about me going to another house? I don't even know Linda, what story are we going to tell?"  
"The point is that you don't know Linda, she doesn't know Will either. Souls break up as well, Wanda, you know that. The story will be that you broke up with Will and you needed a place to stay. No Soul will find it strange that you'll stay with her. We Souls just do acts of kindness."  
He is right. I was thinking about it from a human's point of view. A human would find it odd that I just move in with a stranger. Souls won't even think about it twice.  
I nod. "Okay, I'll go to Linda. Am I going tonight?"  
"It's late. She'll be asleep now. We have two options; You come back up with me, stay at my place and I take you to Linda in the morning. Or you stay here for a day, I go up alone and I'll get you to Linda tomorrow night. Since you and Will are 'splitting up', no one will find it strange that you're not working a day. They will assume that you are taking a day off. The second option would work better for me too, it gives me time to go by Will first and talk to him about all of this."  
"Good, Wanda stays here for a day. Since she is, details can be discussed tomorrow."  
Ian and I go back to our room. For now, we have no other plan than being close to each other. As he takes my dress of again, he stops kissing me just long enough to say: "I have missed you so, so much." I don't get to answer him though.

I can't believe it's just been one week. I have missed Ian so much. The thought of going back out for two more weeks isn't appealing. But I feel I have to do it. Ian didn't give me a hard time about it, he knows me better than that. It's strange how much things change in one week. The last group of humans arrived, all the groups we know are in the bunker now. It's a lot of people, but it isn't crowded, the bunker has enough room. I feel a bit out of place. At breakfast, Ian went to sit with people I don't know. He introduced me and I sat with them, but I didn't connect to them. I was looking around for Melanie and Jared, they were sitting at another table, also surrounded by strangers. Mel sees me looking and smiles at me. Jared follows her gaze and just looks me in the eye. He doesn't look away, so I do. And then Jamie comes to sit with me.  
"Hey Wanda! Why are you still here?"  
It's the first feeling of normal I have since I got into the kitchen. I smile at Jamie.  
"I decided to stay for a day." Jamie is not a kid anymore. And I would explain everything to him, but with the kitchen full of people I don't know, I don't feel comfortable talking about it. He picks up the signal and doesn't comment.  
"Want to watch a game?"  
I look at Ian. He didn't talk about a game, so he isn't going to join in. I missed him, but I missed Jamie as well. Ian is holding my hand, almost absentmindedly, while he is talking to the others. But when I pull my hand away, he cuts off the conversation and looks at me. I should have known he would keep some of his focus on me.  
"Go. Enjoy." Ian kisses my hand and smiles.

Jamie and I head to the large room where they play soccer. On the way he fills me in.  
"There is so little tasks here in the bunker and so many people, that usually, you get two days off and then one day of chores. So everyone has a lot of free time. There are a lot of soccer games. But also, we have younger kids here now. Sharon has been teaching the younger kids. Jeremy, the new teacher, he's teaching the older kids. He's even teaching some of the adults. We have plenty of books in here, so people are learning from that. The gym is usually full. It's nice."  
We reach the game room. I see Kyle standing with a group, so I look at the side wall. There they are, Jodi and Helen. Jamie is full of enthusiasm, he takes off for the game, I walk over to Jodi.  
"Hey. I'm glad you're here for a day." I look surprised. "Kyle told me, he spoke to Jared this morning. Sit down." She pats on the chair next to her.  
As I sit down, she hands me Helen.  
"This little baby has missed you." Jodi smiles. "As have I."  
I get a warm feeling inside. Just a week. Only a week I have been up there and now I feel so happy to be back with my friends, my family. Jodi and I watch the game. We talk a bit about the life she has in here, the life I had outside. She knows about Will, but still lets me tell her the story. It's nice to talk about it with another woman.  
Jamie and Kyle are on the same team and they are winning. The new humans are still exited about being somewhere where they can make noise and run around, they are a bit sloppy in their game. They divide into smaller groups and have several matches. The persons not playing are sitting with me and Jodi. I meet a lot of new people. And in this relaxed setting it's easier to talk, connect and get to know them.

Mel appears at the door and nudges her head at me, meaning she wants me to walk with her. I stand up and Mel takes me to a small room. This room has been made nice. There's a sofa and some arm chairs. Jared is already sitting in one of them.  
"Since you're here now, we thought it was a good time to update you." Melanie starts.  
"The good news is that everything has been going so well, that we all decided to speed up the plan. We were supposed to start in two weeks. But we're going to start in one week. I don't think you'll be back down here before that, so we thought we'd explain some details now."  
Jared takes over.  
"The plan will be to start in the evening. We need to do everything as fast as we can, so the Souls won't be able to fight back."  
I dislike the thought of that. It feels like I'm actually going to fight my own kind. I've made my choice, I'm on the humans side, but still, the way he puts it to words…I don't like the feeling of it being an attack. I know that it is though.  
"This really is a small village. And right now, we have almost half of the Soul population on our side. On the evening of the plan, the Souls on our side will invite the other Souls to their houses. We will use Sleep and remove the Souls. Nick and Burns have been storing tanks for quite some time, we have plenty. You know that nothing will happen to the Souls. For this plan, the first part of it, only Souls are working on it. You don't have to worry about humans doing things they're not supposed to."  
Jared looks at me and pauses, he looks like he's searching for something in my eyes. I know nothing will happen. I have full trust in them. I stay calm and look back. He seems satisfied and starts again.  
"After taking out the Souls, we will get the bodies down here. And the humans will go up."  
"That seems… fast. And dangerous."  
"We've got it all planned out. The bodies will be here in the bunker, safe. Doc, Candy, some more doctors we have down here and up there, all medical people, will stay with them."  
"But I mean the humans going up, how will you know they are safe?" I ask Jared.  
"You know that this is a very small village. The humans will live up there. The Souls on our side will live up there. If a new Soul arrives in the village, we have enough numbers. One, two, or a small group of Souls showing up won't hurt us. We will be able to take them, and get the humans back. Or make them see our way."  
I see the necessity of all of this. And they have found the most peaceful way to do this. No Souls will get hurt. And the humans will get their life outside back. But it feels like a war to me. Which I don't like. For the humans, it _is_ a war. It has felt like a war all this time. And I chose my path.  
"If we take every Soul arriving at this village, then later on we can expand to other villages. All we need is the numbers to do it."  
I'm thinking about something else now.  
"What do you do to the humans not returning to their bodies?"  
Melanie answers: "When Sunny was in Jodi's body, she kept looking for Jodi inside her head. Most of the Souls outside have been doing that as well. Some have found the human inside. Just like Nick has. They are staying in their body at first, so we keep the numbers. If a human doesn't return, one of those Souls will jump Hosts."  
I grimace at the thought, Melanie sees it.  
"None of us like that option. But it's the best option for both Souls and humans. We try to get everyone on our side. That's the reason we want so many Souls out in the village. It's the reason we want you to go back up, even if it's just for one week. More Souls on our side, means more chances of saving human bodies."  
"You are right, Melanie, Jared. You both are. The plan is good. It makes sense. And you know, I really do believe in it. This is your world. And you should have it. I'm glad that you're willing to share it with Souls like me. And I think you will be surprised to find out how many Souls will be wanting to share as well."  
Melanie chuckles.  
"We already are surprised at that Wanda. We never thought we would get such big numbers of Souls on our side in this village." Jared says.  
I get what he means. Even though I am a Soul. And I know that Souls are kind-hearted, I also didn't expect that many to be on the humans side. It gives me hope for a peaceful live together. And taking back the world for the humans, it's going to go as peaceful as possible. So I'm glad. And I hope this plan will work. We will make it work.


	28. Chapter 28

**I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 27.**

"Let's go find out where the rest is."  
Linda steps away from the two bodies of which she just extracted the Souls. This evening, we invited our neighbours in. Linda knew, from the conversations she had with them, that they were not going to be on our side. So we had to take them out. I'm just hoping that the humans in there return.  
I've stayed with Linda this week. She didn't mind having someone in our home, she likes the company. 'A nice change', she said. Living with her is easy. It's a great companionship, but I don't feel close to her. She was nice to live with, but I'm looking forward to being with Ian again.  
Last night Burns came and told us the plan was to go ahead tonight. All of the Souls on our side have invited guests over for coffee. And if everything worked out the way it was planned, by now, all Souls should have been extracted from the bodies. We are supposed to wait for Burns or Nick to come by to get the bodies to the bunker. But Linda just said she wants to leave the house.

"We should wait for Burns or Nick, that's the plan."  
"We know nothing is going to happen here, Wanda. We extracted the Souls, the bodies are here in the bedroom, nothing will happen. But maybe, with someone else, everything isn't going this well. We should find out if anyone needs help."  
I strongly disagree with her. I can understand her need for wanting to help, it's what most Souls want, to help each other. It would be too optimistic to believe that everything is going this well for everyone. But still, I want to stick to the plan.  
"I'm sorry, Linda, but I think we should wait."  
"Well, I'm going out."  
Linda turns around and walks out of the bedroom. What do I do now? Follow her? Stay here? These bodies have to be safe. I have to keep the tanks with the Souls safe. But I can't let Linda take off on her own. Before I decided what to do, the front door shuts close. I look out the window to see where Linda is going. She walks to a house and knocks on the door. Someone opens it. I see Linda starts to speak, but she gets hit and dragged inside. I hold back a scream. Now I'm really lost. What do I do? I can't go out there by myself. I've got no way to contact Burns, Nick or anyone else. I just have to wait until someone shows up.  
I turn around to go watch the bodies, but the humans are already here.

"It's one of them! Take it!" The woman shouts to the man.  
He jumps for me and pushes my arms behind my back. Immediately, I see stars. That hurts, he's pulling back my arms too far.  
"Please, please, listen to me. I..."  
They don't even listen to me and throw me into the bedroom, I stumble towards the bed and turn around. I try again.  
"Please listen to me. I took the Souls out of you. There are more hum-"  
"Shut up! I don't want to hear you talk! Somehow we were freed. We just need to figure out how to free the person inside that body."  
"_I_ took the Soul out!"  
The woman looks mad at me, but the man stops talking.  
"What?"  
I start to talk as fast as I can.  
"Remember. What is the last thing you remember before you came to? Linda and I, we invited you into our house. We told you we'd show you around and then you can't remember anything after that, right? We took the Souls out. We wanted to bring you back to your bodies."  
The man looks at me, he seems to be wondering if I'm telling the truth. But the woman just keeps looking mad.  
"Obviously, she's lying. Someone else must have come in and saved us and this one escaped the others. I mean, the other alien isn't here. That must be it."  
"I don't know..." The man starts, but the woman snaps at him.  
"Don't be deceived by it's innocent looks! We've been trapped in our own bodies for too long. You know what they did, what they do. We can't trust it."  
The man doesn't say anything, but nods at her. He agrees with her. And my heart sinks. I wish Linda would've stayed with me. I don't know what's happened to her. And I don't know if she'd be better of here with me, but I wish I didn't have to do this alone. I just know I won't be able to convince them. All I'm hoping for is that help will come soon.  
"So, how do we take it out? How have they done it for us?"  
"You can't. If you try to take me out of this body, all you will do is kill me and the body."  
"I would say that if I were you. Of course you want us to believe that."  
The man is physically more threatening, but this woman, she is more threatening in her words, her behaviour. I feel I need to be more scared of her than of the man.

We hear screaming outside and the woman and man run to the window. I desperately want to know what's going on, they don't seem to pay attention to me, so I walk to the other window. It's chaos. There are people running out on the street. They are going so fast I can't see whether they are Souls or human, but I guess humans, Souls don't act that way. Several front doors of houses are open. Some of them go into a house, I hear a few screams and then they come back out, two more humans joined them. Several of them have blood on their hands. And my stomach turns.  
They are killing the Souls. The humans have their bodies back and they are killing the Souls, one by one. I know it wasn't supposed to take this long before Burns and Nick came here. Something must've gone wrong with the plan. Of course these humans aren't taking the time to listen to the Souls, to consider the fact that Souls could be on their side. We are the enemy.  
Stupid body! Tears are flowing down my face. I don't want to cry right now, I can't cry right now! What do I do?  
The man in my room opens his window, but the woman shuts it again.  
"No! Come on, let's just take it and go outside!"  
The man takes my arm, and pushes me down the stairs, after the woman. My arm hurts, he's holding on that tight and I can't keep up with his speed. I stumble down the stairs and miss a step. I can feel and hear something snapping in my foot. We are outside now, I'm not even walking anymore, the man is just pulling me forward by my arm.  
The group has started to walk on, but the woman shouts after them.  
"Wait for us!"  
A few of them turn around.  
"Great, you've got another one!"  
The man let's go of me and I just slump down. I don't think I could stand if I wanted to. I lost a shoe along the way and when I just fell, I fell on my face, my cheek burns, I know it's bleeding.  
I look up to see the group coming towards me. I can't believe this went so horribly wrong. I must've shown too much faith in human kindness after all. And I know they won't listen to me. I know I'll die. I love you, Ian.

A car comes round the corner and the group of humans turns around to look. My heart jumps a bit. Maybe this is help for me. But only humans come out of the car. Humans carrying guns. Humans I don't know. But then the last one gets out. He steps out of the car, immediately sees me and looks me in the eyes. And then he points his gun at me.  
"I'd appreciate it if you'd not kill that one. We need her."  
"And who are you?" Someone asks him.  
"I'm the one who set up this whole plan. I didn't get caught once. I was never taken. And these four with me helped as well. There are more humans where we came from and like I said, it would be appreciated if you'd stop killing and came with us so we can explain everything."  
There is a group of about 20 humans around me. Not all of them seem happy at the thought, but I hear others saying that it would be nice to know what's going on, what happened. A few start to walk towards the car first and more follow.  
"Where do we go?"

No one even looks back at me, I'm just sitting here, but I feel I can't even manage that anymore, so I just let my body fall and lie down. I hear footsteps and I see a shadow. He stops right before me and looks down.  
"I'm so glad you're still alive, you know Ian would've held me personally responsible if anything would've happened to you."  
I look up at Jared.  
"You wouldn't be. He knows that."  
"Hardly the point, Wanda. Come on, I'll take you in the car."  
When I try to get up, the last thing I hear is a sigh, the last thing I feel is being lifted. And then everything goes black.

"You should have sent me to her! I should have been there!"  
"Be reasonable, it would have made both of you a target!"  
"I would have kept her safe!"  
"You would've tried. But with the way things blew up, they would've taken care of you as well. You know that, you realize that. You're letting your emotions cloud your judgement, which is why you weren't there."  
"You sent me to the other side of town, where I couldn't help her. How would you have felt if it were Mel?"  
"First of all, I wasn't with Mel, she was on your side of town. Second of all, you can't compare that, Mel isn't a Soul."  
"Exactly! Mel was safe! Wanda wasn't!"  
"And neither would you have been, had you been with her!"  
"Do you think I care!?"  
I have never heard Ian shout that loud.  
"Life without Wanda wouldn't be worth it. It's not important that I'm safe, if she wasn't safe to begin with."  
Melanie looks around the corner and sees I'm awake.  
"Well, she woke up now, so you better get in there, in stead of standing here shouting at my man."  
Ian rushes to my bed.  
"I agree with Mel." I tell him with a soft smile.  
"Naturally."

**Author's note; short chapter! Just one more I think. Sorry to have left you hanging! Things didn't go as well as planned after surgery.**

**Please review!**


	29. Chapter 29

**I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 29.**

We just sit in silence for a long time. Jared looked in and wanted to say something, but Ian just said 'No'. Nothing more, just that word. It worked, Jared left. After a while, I looked away. But I can feel Ian looking at me, I turn around and we both speak at the same time.  
"Tell me what happened."  
I giggle and Ian produces a small smile. He opens his mouth again.  
"You first, Wanda."  
"I think you should go first, if I know what happened, I'll be able to put the pieces together in my head."  
Ian sighs, but he takes my hand and starts talking.  
"Burns and Nick came to the bunkers. The day before, the people going up were already selected. Most of the men, but not all of them. But just like we needed a lot of Souls on our side up here to help us extract the Souls and get the bodies back, we also needed numbers in humans, to convince the humans waking up that the Souls were on our side.  
So, when it was dark out, we went outside and took cars to different locations. The plan was to divide us up as much as possible. To be there when humans woke up. When the Souls took over the humans, they could do it gradually, because we humans didn't know what was happening. But we had to do this all at once, the Souls would immediately notice if there were humans walking around."  
Ian takes a deep breath, he lost track of what I want to hear a bit, I already know this part. But I also know he wants to tell me the whole story, so some things will need repeating.  
"I was sent to a house where they had extracted four Souls. It was done by just two Souls. We felt help would be needed there most, where numbers in Souls were lowest. You were actually in one of the areas where the most Souls were. It was supposed to be safer for you there."  
Ian's voice trails off and he looks at me.  
"I don't know what I would do without you."  
"But still, help was supposed to come to us sooner than it did. Why didn't they show up on time?" I ask Ian.  
"Will." He grunts out.  
I don't get it, what has Will got to do with it? Ian is looking really mad now.

"Will decided he wanted to go looking for you. He wanted to know if you were safe. He was located with someone else, supposed to help that person extract the Souls and then wait for help. But he left, he left the Soul alone with four humans. He left to go and look for you, while he didn't even know where you were, Burns had not told him.  
Once Will left, three of the four humans woke up. And that's where things started to go downhill. The humans attacked the Soul. Burns and Nick dropped off the human's for that location, but they were just too late. Burns and Nick went to look for Will. We should have realised that that wasn't really smart either. It made them a target as well."  
I gasp. "Did they..."  
"They are fine. Nothing happened to them."  
Ian stays quiet after saying that.  
"And Will?"  
"Will wasn't that lucky."  
Oh, no! Will was wrong, he was, but I wouldn't wish him that.

Ian picks the story back up.  
"Because of Will taking off and Burns and Nick going after them, Jared had to take over sending humans to locations. Some humans weren't still trusting everything and decided to go in with more than two at a time, which meant we didn't have much numbers left. When the group got to your street, it wasn't the number of people we had planned for it to be. And they were late. They were supposed to arrive an hour earlier. I'm glad Jared kept overseeing everything, so at least he was there when they got to your street. It was good that there was an authority figure. I don't know what would've happened if he hadn't been there. He knew the plan, he could explain, fast and to the point to the humans. I don't think anyone else could have."  
Ian looks at me with guilt. He has to stop doing that, feeling guilty. It's not his fault. And I know that he knows that. I open my mouth to comfort him, but he talks first.  
"Your turn, Wanda."  
"You know what happened, I'm sure someone's told you already."  
"They have, but I want to hear it from you."  
I'd rather not, I don't want to add to his guilt. He knows what happened, he doesn't need to hear it from me.  
"I want to hear it from you, Wanda. It will help _you_ to talk about it. Sweetheart. Please."  
And at that, I start talking.

**Author's note: Way, way too short, I know. I thought about adding this to chapter 28, but felt that that would make that chapter too long. Then I wanted to make this and the next chapter one chapter, but that didn't work for me either. I just wanted to tie up loose ends here. There's only going to be one more chapter left. It's going to be short as well. But I didn't feel the content of both these short chapters (29 and 30) could go into one document. I hope to get the other one up in an hour or so!  
****As always, please review! I love to read what you guys think! About the story, the way it went, but also about maybe grammar stuff, because English is not my first language!**


	30. Chapter 30

**I do not own anything from the Host, it's all owned by Stephenie Meyer. I'm just using her characters for my imagination :)**

**Chapter 30.**

It's the strangest world. I never would have thought that this would go well. That it could go well. Humans and Souls living together, having peace. Of course, human emotions flare, not everything goes as peaceful as when it would be only Souls. But we have found a way to live together. To work together.  
Six months ago was when we took back the first village for the humans. We expanded since then. With the numbers we have, we have been taking over small villages around us. When we had the right numbers, we could move onto larger villages. It's going fast. The humans want it to go fast. When they were in the caves, when they were in the bunker, living very, very close to each other wasn't that much of a problem. It was needed, surviving. But now, on the outside, the humans want their privacy back, they want their own homes.  
For the first two months, I helped in taking back villages. We all went to help, we moved around a lot. And then Ian insisted that there were others who could do it as well. He said I've been helping humans long enough. We should go and settle down. I still wanted to help, but I liked the idea as well, so we decided to stay in this city. Kyle and Jodi live just a few houses a part from us, Ian and I are glad to have the company of them. Jamie is living in a house here as well, we all keep an eye out for him, even though it's not really needed anymore. Jared and Mel technically live with him, but they are still going to other places, taking back the world for the humans.

Even before I physically feel him touching me, I feel Ian's presence behind me. I'm standing on the balcony, looking at the view, Ian throws his arms around me and I lean into him. Both of his hands rest on my belly.  
"My two loves." He whispers into my ear, making me smile.  
When Ian wanted us to settle down, we talked.

_Sitting on the couch with Ian, in our home, it feels so good. I dread the idea of having to leave again. As if he knows what I'm thinking about, Ian starts to talk. _  
_"I think we should stay here."_  
_I sit up straight and look at him._  
_"What?"_  
_"I think this is where we should stay, we should settle down. You have done enough to help now. Sharon and Doc chose a place to stay. Kyle and Jodi decided to stay in this city. I think we should stay here as well, I'd like to stay close to Kyle, Jodi and Helen. I'd like our kids to grow up together." _  
Our_ kids? What does he mean?  
Ian knows I'm confused, he senses my questions.  
"This, this is the world I want to see my children grow up in Wanda. I've got the best Soul there is. We are living together in peace. I want our children to experience that. This is where and how I want to build on a family. A family with you."  
I don't answer him, but I don't need to. Ian knows how I feel. Even more so, I show him how I feel._

And so here we are, in a few months we will welcome our baby into this Strangest World.

**Author's note: Last one! Thanks for hanging in there with me! Thanks for your reviews, following, liking and even favoriting my story! I am hoping so, so much that you all liked it! I at least, loved writing it! It actually feels a bit bitter-sweet to be selecting the 'completed' for this story... LOL!**


End file.
